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- Story Listed as: True Life For Adults
- Theme: Love stories / Romance
- Subject: Relationships
- Published: 04/30/2016
PART 1
The day 8th march 2012 is tough to forget for me, as this was the day when we oxfordians were meeting probably for the last time. That day we were having our last examination of ICSE. After exam got over all the friends gathered near the garage which was just beside our school premises. Our campus was not too big so we decided to gather for the last time with all friends circle at that particular place. Here all friends don¡¦t mean the entire batch, only the male part. I don¡¦t know why but girls used to stay much far from us, even we didn¡¦t have conversation among us. I had noticed many times whenever I or my friends used to pass by the corridor our class mate girls used to stand apart and let us to go away first. I never got it whether the corridor was too small or they thought that we were from low class and untouchables. I never got this, though smile comes automatically when this permutation combination thought strikes me. There were only few fortunate to have female friend in our batch and the reason of their being fortunate was that, they were topper students. And I still remember that one of my friend yash kashyap was one of them, and more importantly he was been liked by most of the girls in our class, but unfortunately he didn¡¦t give a F**K to any girl in the class.
Barbie Doll!!!! Exactly; if you are thinking that why am I speaking about Barbie doll then let me clear you that she was one of the most beautiful girls in the class. She was quite similar to yash Kashyap, as she was a bit sensitive towards her studies and never gave attention to any guys; though all the guys were ready to make her ¡§Bhabhi¡¨ of their buddy¡¦s. She was damn hot, she used to put a lot of perfume and her fragrance killed everyone. I remember not a single day passed when we had not talked about her. Her name was as sweet as a fragrance she was Malaika mukherjee. Making you remember since I am praising about her it doesn¡¦t make a sense that she was in my heart; there was another beautiful angel who had already resided in my heart. I was a kind of boy who had no interest in any such girls except my beloved.
I remember she used to sit opposite to me in third row I used to look at her with my hidden eyes so that she could not recognize as I was staring at her. Her eyes ¡K.. so beautiful there was something special in them, something which attracted me every time, something which magnetize me, I wanted to hear what her eyes were telling me, the feelings, the truth of the moment, the ¡K¡K¡K. the ¡K¡K.. I don¡¦t know what it was. Coming to the point, here was the last few minutes we all friends were spending together taking snaps, exchanging phone numbers, hugging each other were the only few purpose of that evening; comparing to the universe we were the most saddest person since we were meeting probably our best friend for the last time and more preferably the school where almost all of our classmates grew up studying since childhood. We promised each other to be in touch with everyone on the social networking sites after biding goodbye to everyone we parted away.
PART 2
As ¡§Promises are meant to be broken¡¨ and my fatal friends proved that. Since it was a week I was not in touch with any of them. I felt the reason that it might be they were out of station, seeking for + 2 schools or they didn¡¦t want to be in touch with old friends, to get clarified of my factious thoughts I called them up some ones phones were switched off, some were out of reach and few of them didn¡¦t had cell phone yet. I was just like ill at ease either you may say a fish out of water. I was totally depressed, my behavior had rapidly changed I used to lock up my room and stay hours and hours in dark my meals were halved. Really my friends were salt in delicious food. I was totally alone at that moment. In Maslow¡¦s theory which says social needs are very important but I used to deny his theory according to me when we would have money and all kind of luxury stuffs then who cares of social needs but I was totally wrong.
I remembered it was 14th march 2012 around 11 am I was reading newspaper my phone beeped for 2nd time I rushed expecting to receive message from any of my friend but after I saw the name flashed on Facebook message I was surprised!!!!!!!!! It felt like first sunlight after a thousand of moonlight dark nights, my mouth remained opened for a couple a second I remembered as I dropped my chewing gum which I was chewing.
The message was none other than my girl whom I loved, first time she messaged me. I never massaged her though I used to check her timeline every day. I didn¡¦t have that much of courage so that I could message her. Actually I was quite afraid to do so as I was a bit shy guy and lacking lots in courage and the second reason for not texting her was that our parents were mutual friends and I would complete it by saying that my dad was very strict if he knew that I was doing all these sort of things then he would have definitely thrown me out from his house. Though I loved her but I was afraid.
As I clicked on the message to read out, my heart beat increased within a second it turned from 72 to infinite ƒº my network was of 2g, so it was taking time to open finally it opened, her text was ¡§wishing you many- many happy returns of the day Rahul¡¨ yes that day was my birthday and I was happy to have received her wish. My life had certainly been fueled up. I was thanking Mark Zurkenberg for creating such an app namely called Facebook.
Her second message was ¡§P. Saha sir ko v mere taraf se birthday wish kar dena¡¨. Mr. Saha was commerce teacher in our school and fortunately he used to share his birthday with me but who cares to inform him, P Saha was my private tutor and he stayed near by my house might she knows that.
My life was filled with fresh air. I was enjoying again I forgot my friends and started thinking what to reply her, started looking at her DP, started talking to my phone screen kissing on screen and so much crazy things I did that day.
The only thank you reply was needed but I was going mad that day, the only one text made me to do so many things if she became my life how to react never thought of that. After an hour I replied thank you with a big smile ƒº it was the first time I in boxed her, feeling was just awe!!!!!!!!!!! Butterflies were tickling in my stomach it energized me the very next moment again my phone beeped replied by my girl ¡§welcome Rahul¡K.enjoy your day¡K¡Kmajey karo¡¨ she said and I was enjoying a precious day with a beautiful feelings presented by a beautiful girl.
I didn¡¦t reply of her previous message coz my mind was forcing not to text her, as we were texting the first time. She might feel uncomfortable or not feel interested to talk with me etc. etc. and certainly there were many more reasons I was thinking off.
Noon passed and evening too after every 5mins my Facebook account was refreshed to check any message from her, but every time I was disappointed. My heart used to say that ¡§message karoge tabhi na reply aayega.¡¨ My mind told a big NO, there was big fight between my heart and my mind on this topic. But who cares of mind in matter of love my heart won and I did¡K I messaged her ¡§Hi¡¨ it was around 7:30pm she was online though she read my message but didn¡¦t care to reply. I shut my desktop down at 8:00pm and went to terrace. Things changed in the morning I was the happiest person of this universe but with the coming dusk it was seemed to be opposite. The girl who fueled me in the morning made break down in the lovely evening.
I was looking at the moon which was playing hide and seek with the clouds and feeling the breeze which was touching me in that mid of March. I was sad, the precious day ended with making me feel alone. I thought of friend and my girl and slept.
The next morning after a sound sleep I woke up at 9:30am I was still on the bed when I switched on my phone and enabled my data and after that I immediately logged into my Facebook account which showed me message from my girl. Again it felt like first bite of bread after hundred days of hunger. I was happy to see her name flashed in my inbox her message was ¡§hello ¡§ and added with ¡§sorry I was busy a bit so I couldn¡¦t reply you yesterday since my brothers were with me¡¨ her message was at 6 in the morning this message confirmed me that her family was too strict as of mine. She belonged from UP and up to my knowledge peoples from UP and Bihar are often too strict to their children¡¦s. So that was might be the reason that she didn¡¦t reply me the last night.
I wanted to talk to her so that she could know me well. Now days, most of the boys are not trustworthy and girls think that every boys are the same. Though I was not like the most.
I was much serious about her. And I needed to prove her that how much I loved her and for proving I needed to talk to her. Fortunately she was online at that moment; I dared to message her ¡§hi¡K..good morning¡¨ in the very next moment my message was seen I don¡¦t know whether she was waiting for my text or it was just a co incidence; may be that it was a co incidence though the 1st statement stuck me and increased my heart beat¡K..her text arrived my inbox wishing me good morning we started formal chatting like our ICSE exams, which schools she was joining, toughness of economics paper, results etc. ¡K¡K..etc. ¡K..Etc.¡Kit continued till 10 am. The time I was under blanket. From toes to head blanket was covering me, I was hugging a side pillow and only the breath and the heart beat was breaking the silence of my room.
She wanted to go somewhere... She clarified... ¡§Talk to you later on¡¨ and went offline. I wanted to talk more with her and wished to had supernatural powers of Bengali baba ka jadu and all so as I could stop her from going. I being normal human being couldn¡¦t rely on Bengali baba and all except could I do wait for her to come back online again.
A week later¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K
With passing days, she was knowing me well and I too, at some point we used to had informal communication too. She was adding bit and bit of water to fill the glass. We used to text for longer time but never gave a clue that I love her. I was afraid as our friendship relation might get in danger. She was at her ¡¥Nani¡¦s¡¦ house from the day ICSE exams were over. She used to be online most of the time not for the purpose of chatting but for playing online games. I couldn¡¦t remember the name of that girlish game. Every now and then her Facebook wall was updated saying can you beat my score, I scored this much.
It was 2nd April it¡¦s all about the day I was waiting for; I remember around 3 o¡¦ clock we were chatting and I was full of confidence on that day. The day I was going to express my love feelings for her, my confidence was full till the time come I got nervous. I gathered my full guts and said ¡¥I need to tell you something¡¦, she replied ¡§hmm bolo¡¨. I drank full glass of water and started telling my feelings for her. I planned lot of things to say her in a very romantic way but couldn¡¦t able to do so. I forgot everything which I prepared to say her. I typed ¡§jo main kehne jaa raha hoon use seriously lena, I am not joking at all¡K. Will you be my life partner? I want to share everything with you, tumhare sath apna future dekhta hoon, I love you. I love you lottttttt¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡Kand much more promises desire and love I added¡¨
After a silence of couple of minutes she said, ¡§Rahul aaj 1st april nahi hai¡¨ I replied ¡§aaj 1st april nahi hai tabhi to tumhe keh raha hoon, I really love you¡¨
She was shocked to know she went offline without saying anything. I don¡¦t know whether I did the right thing or did I make her upset? Will she ever talk to me? Where did she went I was tensed many things was striking me. In the evening at 7pm she came online and messaged me,¡¨ Rahul ye nahi ho sakta and I am sorry tum aisa kuch feelings rakhte ho mere liye mai kavi sochi v nahi thi¡¨, and went offline.
After her text I didn¡¦t respond anything and l left her to stay alone.
Days and days passed I tried to show her much I love her but every time she denied. I tried each and everything but didn¡¦t get a positive result. I failed¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K..
PART-3
Eight months later *************
¡§Babu why didn¡¦t you talk to papa regarding English tuition, you have promised me that you was going to talk this Sunday evening¡¨ Guys you must be thinking who is babu here? Then let me clear you ¡¥Babu¡¦ here is none other than me and the girl shouting those question is my queen, my life, my love, my baby, and more importantly my ¡¥Nishika¡¦ to whom earlier I confessed my feelings of love for her. Initially she denied my love but finally she accepted me as her love after few months of my proposal. We were in love. It sounds quite crazy but it¡¦s true. Many things happened within these eight months. After coming of her in my life my Facebook relationship status updated to committed, she became password of my Gmail and twitter id and my phone went to silent mode. After all she was mine now.
Nishika accepted me on 5th July and fortunately we were in the same school and Accounts tuition. I was so lucky to have her in my life; my happiness was beyond my limits, I never expected to get pampering and caring as she used to do. There were no such words to express how we were crazy about us. Sometimes it seemed that she loved me more than I did. I remembered in those chilling nights she used to go on the terrace just to have a talk with me; she shifted herself to her study room so that her younger naughty brother who couldn¡¦t disturb us from texting. Since childhood Nishika¡¦s family accompanied her every time she never stayed alone, her big phobia was darkness and butterflies. After coming of mine in her life she did unexpected things which were totally unbelievable. Nishika¡¦s family was a joint family, they stayed in a giant house they had a big car and lot of luxury stuffs. I came to know all about these after being in relationship. She was rich and her family was quite modern as compared to mine.
Nishika changed my life too; a poor boy in studies progressed to an average one, my talking skill changed, my anger was bit controlled, rarely I found myself in the cricket ground; where every evening I used to go. I preferred walking than taking bus; and started saving money to buy a present for my love. Monthly expenditure on phone increased though I loved to make recharges for her.
Our life was running perfectly on the track, we were the wheels of our future dreams and our dreams were smoothly moving to convert it into reality. After 6 months of being in relationship we moved to new phase where romance stepped in. The past six months we talked about everything except doing romance. We both were shy to start on this topic somehow I managed to speak on this. Guys, let me remind you that here romance doesn¡¦t mean we did in reality, it¡¦s just in chats (messages). In reality having romance was next to impossible. Even I never gathered courage to speak on these matters on phone calls, we relied on texts. Though I knew she won¡¦t allow me to speak orally on such topics. Nishika was different from all and this was one of the reasons for which I was mad for her.
On 26th December at 10:15 pm we were back at our respective living rooms. After our dinner we usually used to be online at sharp 10¡¦o clock once or twice in a blue moon; someone got sometimes late. We talked about the day we spent in school, we talked about the dinner and more importantly and compulsorily I asked her about the medicine which she took or not? Every day she used to forget and I made her remember. Nishika used to take medicine since last year, still her illness was not fully recovered I don¡¦t know how the doctor was; sometimes I felt to give that bitter medicine to that stupid doctor. I just hated him for giving much bitter medicine to my innocent baby.
When I asked her about the medicine she took or not, she replied ¡§babu aaj nhi na, plz I¡¦m in the room and don¡¦t wanna go down to take medicine again, tumhe chhod k nhi jana avi¡¨ I forced her to go but she said a single thing which made me to do whatever she wants ¡§Shona¡¨. I was killed whenever she used to call me by this name. Hardly my heart melts in the matter of medical though I allowed her what she wanted.
We started our conversation and at some point I said ¡§in today¡¦s accounts tuition u were looking damn hot on white top, mann kar raha tha sab k samne tumhe zor wala hugggg kar loon¡¨ she said ¡§ achaaaaa¡¨ with a big smile. I love the way she said ¡§achaaaa¡¨ and added ¡§himmat to hai nahi, aaye bada hug karne waley ƒº¡¨ . ¡§himmat ki baat mat karo, I can do anything¡¨ I said. Our chat continued in jolly mood it was around 11:30 pm and that moment something was happening to me which I wasn¡¦t able to express her. I don¡¦t know what I was speaking and doing my hands were shivering, my breath was fast I was filling thirsty where no water can put out my thirst, I was sweating at 10 degree Celsius. I said to my baby ¡§please come closer to me¡¨. She questioned me ¡§what happened?¡¨ I knew she also knew what was happening to me and I was quite sure that something the same she was facing there. When we were out of control she hugged me and I companied her, we kissed each other not the regular one it was special, my lips were locked into her. She was sleeping on me and I was moving my hand at her back. I kissed on her forehead followed by nose, chin, neck, and everywhere. We did everything that night. I wished to have those romantic nights every day and night. I was complete then we slept at 4 in the morning.
PART-4
After our class 11 exam got over I joined English tuition and kept the promise which I made her earlier. In that tuition there were not many chaos of students likes our accounts tuition. We were only three. Me, my love and her best friend Poorva Pandey. The environment of that room was cool and teaching experience of chandrakant sir was just awesome. We used to joke, enjoy and share our experiences, sir used to tell us how couples bunked classes where he used to teach, how Bengali kids reacted when he spoke in English and much more funny things were there which made us laugh. I and my love started spending time alone. We used to reach tuition earlier and her friend used to come late. Poorva helped us a lot to spend time with together. Sir knew everything about our relationship but never pretended. Sir left us alone till everyone joins.
Impossible itself says I am possible and our next to impossible thing turned possible in the mid of May. At 7:10pm Nishika¡¦s dad dropped her at English tuition. I was standing apart and waiting her dad to return. No sooner did he return than I followed to tuition. When I entered, the room smelled as usual of my love fragrance. I was habituated with the perfume which she used to put every day. I could seek my love among 1000s of people. The fragrance was very different; I have never smelt of that fragrance ever in my life. I don¡¦t know whether it was imported perfume or it was my love. When she stood up to let me go Inside, I started staring at her. She was looking something different that day. Her silky and soft untied hair was waving in the air, her large dazzling chocolate brown eyes were sparkling like stars and winking at me, her lips were blossom soft which was dabbed with baby pink lip balm, her beautiful chin made me fall every time I saw her; actually I didn¡¦t have words to write for her chin¡¦s beautiness, I like her chin the most. Her attire was black denim and fitted sky blue top printed with ¡¥happy birthday to me¡¦.
Softly she slapped on my hand and said ¡§bas karo ab jao bhi¡¨ I took my seat just beside her after that she added with sweet smile ¡§poorva called me up and informed that she wasn¡¦t coming¡¨. I was happy to get that news as we were going to spend full ninety minutes alone.
Dazzling of rain started and within minutes it rained like cat and dog. The rain was making me more romantic, we were viewing the showers through the window. Suddenly sir stepped in and said he was going to pick her wife from bus stand as she wasn¡¦t having umbrella and went away.
The very next moment we were alone, Nishika was siting just near to me and I was looking at her, she was reading her text book. I don¡¦t know whether she was nervous or uncomfortable. I called her ¡§Nishika¡¨ but she didn¡¦t reply. Her right hand was on her thigh so I smoothly grasped her hand with my left hand. Smiling at me mischievously she pulled my hand down. My heart was beating as fast as it seemed it would come out of my chest. Again I called her but she didn¡¦t reply, I shifted myself towards her and slowly turned her face toward me and asked ¡§are you comfortable na?¡¨ she nodded her head with winking of her beautiful eyes. Now her fingers were busy in tearing papers, I whispered I love you she smiled and made her eyes down which were still busy with the papers. I took the paper from her hand and kept aside, placed her beautiful soft hands between mine and promised her ¡§I¡¦ll love you till my last breath¡¨. I gathered courage and sweetly kissed on her soft hands. Slowly I pulled her face up to mine but her eyes were still stuck down. I went closer to her face and heard a rapid breath which she was inhaling. I kissed on her cheek but she didn¡¦t respond, again I dare to put my lip at her and gently rubbed it. Then she broke her silence and hugged me, her lips were into mine and we were sucking. It continued for more than a minute, I don¡¦t remember who closed the eyes first.
I pulled out my lips first as her hairs was tickling in my ear. After she arranged her hair again I passionately kissed on her neck, on chin, on eyes, on forehead. After I kissed on her ear she felt something which made us lip lock again. We were passionately kissing each other till the time we heard the horn of motorcycle. Nishika rushed from the chair arranged her hair and said ¡§aa rahe hain papa¡¨. Rain stopped so her dad came early to pick up, till sir didn¡¦t back. She packed her bag kissed me and parted. I too left as soon as sir came back.
PART-5
Happiness killed our hunger and we were online at 9:30pm. The girl who was silent few hours back was now talking lot, and as a good lover I was listening to her. At some point I asked her how she felt. She replied ¡§definitely bohtttttt accha, and you?¡¨ I answered in naughty way ¡§pata nahi next class mein jarur btaunga¡¨ she exclaimed ¡¥Hawwwwww Besharm!!!!!!!!! No next class ab¡¦ I laughed and she too. I said about the body lotion, lip balm and powder I inhaled that evening. She burst into laughter and asked me to describe the taste. I added ¡§lip balm toh fir v thik tha but the awful powder felt like I am in desert suddenly sweet breeze came and filled my mouth with sand not the actual one but the white one¡¨ she laughed carefree after knowing this and I joined her. She was very happy and as she was happy, I was happy too.
I was so mad about her that just to look her happy like she was then, I can intake bottle of powder without any hesitation. Our chat continued till late night but laughter predominated.
The next followed classes I didn¡¦t get the taste of powder; she gave up all the cosmetics, only she used to put was lite lip balm and kajal, still her beauty not moved by an inch. Our life was going perfectly on the right track we were the happiest couple of the universe.
PART-6
There is an old saying after every happiness sad comes. Since it¡¦s a part and parcel of life and hence it was proved in our relationship. It dropped like a dynamite on me when I read my baby¡¦s text ¡§mumma ko humare bare mein sb pta chal gaya hai, she took my phone anyhow I am messaging you, plz don¡¦t text or call¡¨. Her message freezes me from top to bottom, I didn¡¦t know how to react on it, my blood stopped flowing and my mind was not working. I rushed to my sister priyanka and narrated everything even she was much tensed than me. Though she motivated me and asked to call Nishika¡¦s friend to know exactly what happened. As her suggestion I called her close friend Ishita to know the matter what happened exactly and to know how my love was. Ishita narrated me everything and asked me to call Nishika¡¦s best friend Poorva pandey for more details. I immediately cut the call of Ishita and called poorva she described how Nishika¡¦s mother scolded her by saying ¡§school mein tum sab padhne jate ho yeh sb krne?¡¨ and much more things, she narrated and added ¡§Nishika ko bhtt tez fever hai¡¨ I was totally blank after knowing this I need to talk to my girl and how it was possible I don¡¦t know.
After every passing hours I used to call and text both of them to know the status of my love, but every time I heard ¡§Nishika se meri baat nahi ho pa rahi¡¨ I called more to Ishita than poorva. Ishita was bit closer to me than poorva. I knew I was disturbing her though my heart forced me every time and she was so sweet never spoke rude to me. She got scoldings from Nishika¡¦s mom still she tried every time whenever I asked her. I would never forget her favor for me.
In the evening I came to know from Ishita my love was bit fine yet and even I came to know that my loves mumma cried. I was feeling so bad for her. I prayed to God for making everything normal, for good health of my love and asked God to punish me if I did anything wrong and not to be so cruel to my love and her pretty mom.
The next morning at 10:00 Nishika called me up, she said hello in very soft voice from her low pitch voice any one can get that she was not well, I asked her how are you? She tried to say something but I couldn¡¦t get her. She was really not well, tear rolled from my eyes. Again she tried to speak and this time I got her. She said ¡§better from previous day and I will be all right within an hour, nothing had happened to me itna tension mt lo tum¡¨ and gave a smile. I knew it was a fake smile just to get energized. And added ¡§mumma is talking properly with me so everything would gonna be normal thoda time do, aur haan don¡¦t try to call me or text jab tk mera na aay, Aapna khyal rakhna babu¡¨ I said you too and she cut the phone.
I was the worst boyfriend that moment ¡¥chah kr k v kuch nahi kr pa raha tha¡¦ my girl was suffering from high fever at that crucial moment and how unfortunate I was as couldn¡¦t company her.
Within a week everything returned to normal condition, my love was doing well, her mom returned her cell back and again we were back to our previous stage where love, romance, care and new experiences made our relationship much stronger. I thanked God for accepting my prayer.
PART-7
The road diverged but I couldn¡¦t travel the both. After our ISC results declared we were in the different path Nishika chose B.com as she wanted to be a CA and my focus was in corporate sector so I went for my business management studies. We moved to different colleges, we were been taught different papers so there was no valid reason to take tuition together. We were been physically separated by nature though our bond was as strong as earlier. We use to see each other once in a blue moon, but our chatting and talking didn¡¦t reduce even it increased with passing days.
Without fighting relationship
Seems to be death and we never gave an opportunity for it. As every relationship we use to have small and silly argument and our anger didn¡¦t continue for more than couple of hours. We used to laugh after for the reason we were arguing after sort out. Mainly we argue for IPL matches as I was die heart supporter of Mumbai Indians and her team was Kolkata knight Riders, our argue on the basis Kapil sharma, made fun of her wife sumon, I love that and as a girl she doesn¡¦t like, her Facebook password named after SRK as a lover I was bit jealous so I used to say bad about him this is also the reason of our argument and lots of silly and cute reasons were there for our argument.
One of the biggest reasons for our argument was there too. It was not so silly, not so cute, not so funny and not so forgettable easily. Every time my heart include in this fight and the reason was not other than her best friend Poorva Pandey. Yes you are reading correctly, its Poorva Pandey!!! We use to have fight after every second week. As you all guys know that ¡§ yeh sala sab best friend ka chutiyapaah hai¡¨
Most of my friends and well-wishers used to advise me ¡§agar tum aapna future NJ k sath sochte ho toh NJ ko kaho poorva se dur rahe¡¨ here friends indicate male and female part, even poorva¡¦s closest friend used to say me. They used to tell ¡¥poorva can do anything for her mean¡¦ and ultimately poorva proved everything right as she used to leave Nishika in college and return back alone, she doesn¡¦t company her in need , poorva used to tell bad words for me ¡¥tu galt ki relation mein aa k¡¦ ETC¡K¡K. , she used to call Nishika every morning and talk very nicely so she could get pick up and drop up facility by her new scooty to respective CPT classes, and much more reason which I would not like to narrate here. I never wanted to separate them I just wanted to show the mirror of truth. My love was very innocent and I don¡¦t liked these things were happening with her.
PART-8
Truth never struggles to finds its way and I don¡¦t know why Nishika spread rumor about our breakup, we were perfectly doing well, I used to ask about this f***ing reasons she used to claim that she didn¡¦t want anybody knows about our relation. Quite strange!!! After 2 1/2years informed everyone about our separation. Though as a good lover I used to tell people as she asked me to describe and I stopped talking to those whom I scripted. I felt might be any family reason or any such that¡¦s why she was lying to everyone. My Nishika was not like that she never lied to anyone and even she knew I just hate dishonest people.
PART-9
Three years passed in our relationship things started deteriorating by passing days. Love and romance were much far from us. Our relationship stuck on DEMAND, ORDER and f***ing SORRY. Nishika joined new CPT tuition somewhere in Howrah maidan and there after her order to me was not to text her in the tuition and the reason was ¡§I don¡¦t wanna text in front of poorva pandey¡¨ after that I was been blocked everywhere Facebook, phone, messaging, hangout, Whatsapp and hike. After returning she used to unblock me, Nishika used to chat in front of her parents whom she scared a lot but never in her tuition. Blocking and unblocking continued¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K
The first time I was against my beloved whatever she forbade me to do I used to do the same. It was big mistake of my life. My curiousness made me to do every time. Whenever I was been ordered not to text and she blocked me then only I use to message her from way2sms where nobody can block me. I was bored with different reason wanted to know the exact reason why she blocks me? Why she avoid in front of poorva? What poorva wants? What poorva earing her up? Was poorva seeking for her new jeeju? One most important question did she love me? If yes then why was she avoiding me, if NO then why was not she clarifying it?
I believe her more than myself though lots of fishy thoughts were running in hard disk of my mind. I just needed to be cleared once. Guys I was so deeply in love with her just to see her happy I could do anything, if she had asked me to leave her as if she has started liking someone else there after without putting any full stop or coma I would definitely move from her life. But she was not clarifying anything which overloaded me lots of stress.
PART-10
28th July 2015 at 7:10pm, Nishika returned from normal classes and she was online. That day we didn¡¦t had chat since morning so I messaged her ¡¥hi¡¦ , she was online but didn¡¦t bothered to reply me, I thought she might be busy so after couple of minutes I nudge her two times and added ¡§busy ho kya?¡¨ she responded ¡§kya hai tumko?¡¨ I don¡¦t know the reason why she was angry after that I text her ¡§kya hua baby itna naraz kyun ho?¡¨ and again I typed ¡§tuition se wapas aa kr kuch khaye the?¡¨ she replied rudely ¡§tumse matlab¡¨. Our text average ratio was 3:1 after 3 or 4 message from me I used to get 1 reply. She was posing this attitude since last 2 months.
It hurted me lot whenever I was treated like that. I don¡¦t remember how much tears rolled from my eyes. I asked Nishika to unblock me on Whatsapp as multiple times shifting on hike and whatsapp making delay in message. Her feedback ¡§nahi karenge unblock kya kar lega tu?¡¨ and blocked me on hike too. I don¡¦t know what exactly was happening with me. I was sad and frustrated too. I wanted to know why I was treated like zoo animal? My anger made me to call her; though my number was blocked, I tried to call and text her from different numbers and through way2sms. Fortunately after 7-8 calls and 15 messages I was unblocked on hike and she said a thing which felt like thunderstorm felt at me, it felt like suddenly a racing car hit me. It paralyzed me I was half alive.
Her message ¡§I want break-up, don¡¦t wanna stay any more with you get lost from my life, And lot of things she added¡¨ Babu changed to Rahul, tum was replaced by ¡¥Tu¡¦, the girl who prayed for my healthy life now wished for my death and I was been abused. Things changed unexpected. Reason I don¡¦t know???????????????
A week later sawan brought the first shower of love. The season where couple gets more romantic, the season where distance are reduced, the season where millions of farmers are waited for. But this sawan I was alone, mohhabat didn¡¦t rained on me.
How could have I let my love go, I used to call her, text her, convenience her, beg from my love and as usual sorry for what I don¡¦t know, every time I was insulted but never bothered about that. The day of Raksha Bandhan Nishika was very happy in her happiness she said such a thing which made me more confused ¡§I love you but don¡¦t wanna stay with you Rahul¡¨ what kind of statement was that I really don¡¦t know. Beggigns and sorrys continued for 5 months. Every day and night I begged for one more chance, I promised her that I won¡¦t message her from way2, I was ready to do whatever she wanted, but every time I failed¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K
The water reached its height when I decided to move on permanently from her happy life, and kept a promise want to meet you for the last time after that I won¡¦t message or call you. She accepted my proposal and dates were fixed. This meeting didn¡¦t energize me as previous one, even it made me weaker.
Three days later I received her message, she denied of coming as she added her friend advised ¡§akele mt ja tu safe nahi hai, rahul tujhe harm krne k liye bula raha hai¡¨. It was like WTF!!!!! I don¡¦t care of her friend¡¦s advice but the girl who already knew me for more than 3 years how could she think like that??? I called for just to see her last time and nothing else. Then, First time I forced her for come and after an hour I got her message I will come but poorva will accompany me.
I don¡¦t know why poorva was coming with her even I don¡¦t call her at isolated place it was Haldiram¡¦s at Exide in the noon. While returning from college at evening I was not well and lot of tension were running in mind I took my cell out and typed a message ¡§Breakup toh karwa hi di mera ab jb main milne ja raha hoon last time toh v tumhe piche-piche aana hai, what you want yaar?¡¨ and this text was successfully delivered to my not so favorite poorva pandey.
After reading my text poorva pandey shaken up and replied ¡§shame on you rahul a girl left you, she deserve much more better than you, you were just playing game with her, you spoiled her life and you were getting benefit so you were in relationship and much more thing she said to me in very rude way¡¨ even I too. Every true lover would treat the same what I did. Even poorva said she will show my status. (Still those messages are with me).
I reported everything to Nishika but she didn¡¦t say anything to her best friend. I don¡¦t know what advantage had I taken? It might be Nishika¡¦s expensive gifts for me and I could not return her the same, might be that benefit poorva was talking about. I decided to return her gifts as I didn¡¦t want to keep any benefit on me. I called Nishika near my house and she came this time. I returned her unsealed parker pen, imported deo which was half used, romantic candle set, branded wrist watch, cards and everything she gifted me. Even I never asked to pay for me or recharge my number, whenever Nishika used to call me I cut her call and called her back then how could have I taken benefit from her??? It was out of syllabus, only poorva can solve it. Poorva compared my love with money. After I returned gifts I came back to home locked up my room and cried like anything, she might sob and someone celebrated.
23rd December was the last day I saw my love, I listened to her, I text her after that Nishika came only in my dreams. She made me happiest person just for 37 months and left me alone forever¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K.
Some days later I recharged poorva¡¦s phone as just some sort of benefit will be reduced from my head. She clarifies her intension was not so such. She spoke those words in anger. I don¡¦t know whether she clarified was true or not but that moment of time I said ¡§I forgive you¡¨ but is it possible guys to forgive the girl who separate me from my future? If poorva would abuse me or harm me then definitely I would turn her deed to my bad dreams, I can¡¦t forget the dirty game she played to me, even I can¡¦t take any action to her as she was my love¡¦s best friend. Except can I do is cursing her from my melancholy soul.
I don¡¦t know how Nishika is now? How she is doing? Is her illness fully recovered or not? Does she use to takes her medicine at time? I don¡¦t know anything about her. I don¡¦t have contact with her. I can¡¦t do anything except praying for her and missing her¡K¡K¡K
¡§Kaali kaali khali raaton se.. hone lagi hai dosti,
khoya khoya inn raahon mein ab mera kuch bhi nahi,
har pal har lamha main kaise sheta hoon,
har pal har lamha main khud se ye kheta rheta hoon,
tujhe bhula diya o¡K.tujhe bhula diya o o
fir kyun teri yaadon ne mujhe rula diya¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K.¡¨
The present
Somehow my days are passed but nights are bulk of pain, my cuts are recovering but wounds are still the same. After my relationship was been killed I moved to depression where I just eat to survive, speak to prove I am still alive. It¡¦s seems everything ended for me. I use to lock myself in room for most of the time, my sleep is reduced. This situation made my family to think about. My dad presented me a laptop so I could spend time on that; he sent me in a vacation of north and south India so as I can feel fresh. I was much surer that I would marry that girl so I use to narrate everything to my sister and after she left me, I stopped talking to my sister.
One my special friends Sikandar is helping me lot to come up with the situation, he use to come every day by skipping his valuable work just to make me laugh. I never laughed on his joke I just laugh when he use to laugh. His laughing is quite different from all. Exactly like ROFL. He is very good person.
My amitians friends Ankur, Rohit, Aditya, Sourav, Ranit and all are helping me and lot to cope up. They never give a feeling of loneness. Each and every time they use to call me, message me, use to send me a joke and many crazy things they are doing. Even they fools started seeking girl for me but they don¡¦t know,¡¨ no beautiful attraction can attract me now.¡¨
I thank all of them who really care for me and motivating me. Thankyou Arka for helping me whenever I needed, and thanks a lot for creating such a lovely cover photo. Thank you for reading my unrevealed love story. You can write me on [email protected] or follow me on twitter #followrahul_ray
Thank you.
April 2, 2016
Rahul Ray
The un-revealed love story(Rahul Ray)
PART 1
The day 8th march 2012 is tough to forget for me, as this was the day when we oxfordians were meeting probably for the last time. That day we were having our last examination of ICSE. After exam got over all the friends gathered near the garage which was just beside our school premises. Our campus was not too big so we decided to gather for the last time with all friends circle at that particular place. Here all friends don¡¦t mean the entire batch, only the male part. I don¡¦t know why but girls used to stay much far from us, even we didn¡¦t have conversation among us. I had noticed many times whenever I or my friends used to pass by the corridor our class mate girls used to stand apart and let us to go away first. I never got it whether the corridor was too small or they thought that we were from low class and untouchables. I never got this, though smile comes automatically when this permutation combination thought strikes me. There were only few fortunate to have female friend in our batch and the reason of their being fortunate was that, they were topper students. And I still remember that one of my friend yash kashyap was one of them, and more importantly he was been liked by most of the girls in our class, but unfortunately he didn¡¦t give a F**K to any girl in the class.
Barbie Doll!!!! Exactly; if you are thinking that why am I speaking about Barbie doll then let me clear you that she was one of the most beautiful girls in the class. She was quite similar to yash Kashyap, as she was a bit sensitive towards her studies and never gave attention to any guys; though all the guys were ready to make her ¡§Bhabhi¡¨ of their buddy¡¦s. She was damn hot, she used to put a lot of perfume and her fragrance killed everyone. I remember not a single day passed when we had not talked about her. Her name was as sweet as a fragrance she was Malaika mukherjee. Making you remember since I am praising about her it doesn¡¦t make a sense that she was in my heart; there was another beautiful angel who had already resided in my heart. I was a kind of boy who had no interest in any such girls except my beloved.
I remember she used to sit opposite to me in third row I used to look at her with my hidden eyes so that she could not recognize as I was staring at her. Her eyes ¡K.. so beautiful there was something special in them, something which attracted me every time, something which magnetize me, I wanted to hear what her eyes were telling me, the feelings, the truth of the moment, the ¡K¡K¡K. the ¡K¡K.. I don¡¦t know what it was. Coming to the point, here was the last few minutes we all friends were spending together taking snaps, exchanging phone numbers, hugging each other were the only few purpose of that evening; comparing to the universe we were the most saddest person since we were meeting probably our best friend for the last time and more preferably the school where almost all of our classmates grew up studying since childhood. We promised each other to be in touch with everyone on the social networking sites after biding goodbye to everyone we parted away.
PART 2
As ¡§Promises are meant to be broken¡¨ and my fatal friends proved that. Since it was a week I was not in touch with any of them. I felt the reason that it might be they were out of station, seeking for + 2 schools or they didn¡¦t want to be in touch with old friends, to get clarified of my factious thoughts I called them up some ones phones were switched off, some were out of reach and few of them didn¡¦t had cell phone yet. I was just like ill at ease either you may say a fish out of water. I was totally depressed, my behavior had rapidly changed I used to lock up my room and stay hours and hours in dark my meals were halved. Really my friends were salt in delicious food. I was totally alone at that moment. In Maslow¡¦s theory which says social needs are very important but I used to deny his theory according to me when we would have money and all kind of luxury stuffs then who cares of social needs but I was totally wrong.
I remembered it was 14th march 2012 around 11 am I was reading newspaper my phone beeped for 2nd time I rushed expecting to receive message from any of my friend but after I saw the name flashed on Facebook message I was surprised!!!!!!!!! It felt like first sunlight after a thousand of moonlight dark nights, my mouth remained opened for a couple a second I remembered as I dropped my chewing gum which I was chewing.
The message was none other than my girl whom I loved, first time she messaged me. I never massaged her though I used to check her timeline every day. I didn¡¦t have that much of courage so that I could message her. Actually I was quite afraid to do so as I was a bit shy guy and lacking lots in courage and the second reason for not texting her was that our parents were mutual friends and I would complete it by saying that my dad was very strict if he knew that I was doing all these sort of things then he would have definitely thrown me out from his house. Though I loved her but I was afraid.
As I clicked on the message to read out, my heart beat increased within a second it turned from 72 to infinite ƒº my network was of 2g, so it was taking time to open finally it opened, her text was ¡§wishing you many- many happy returns of the day Rahul¡¨ yes that day was my birthday and I was happy to have received her wish. My life had certainly been fueled up. I was thanking Mark Zurkenberg for creating such an app namely called Facebook.
Her second message was ¡§P. Saha sir ko v mere taraf se birthday wish kar dena¡¨. Mr. Saha was commerce teacher in our school and fortunately he used to share his birthday with me but who cares to inform him, P Saha was my private tutor and he stayed near by my house might she knows that.
My life was filled with fresh air. I was enjoying again I forgot my friends and started thinking what to reply her, started looking at her DP, started talking to my phone screen kissing on screen and so much crazy things I did that day.
The only thank you reply was needed but I was going mad that day, the only one text made me to do so many things if she became my life how to react never thought of that. After an hour I replied thank you with a big smile ƒº it was the first time I in boxed her, feeling was just awe!!!!!!!!!!! Butterflies were tickling in my stomach it energized me the very next moment again my phone beeped replied by my girl ¡§welcome Rahul¡K.enjoy your day¡K¡Kmajey karo¡¨ she said and I was enjoying a precious day with a beautiful feelings presented by a beautiful girl.
I didn¡¦t reply of her previous message coz my mind was forcing not to text her, as we were texting the first time. She might feel uncomfortable or not feel interested to talk with me etc. etc. and certainly there were many more reasons I was thinking off.
Noon passed and evening too after every 5mins my Facebook account was refreshed to check any message from her, but every time I was disappointed. My heart used to say that ¡§message karoge tabhi na reply aayega.¡¨ My mind told a big NO, there was big fight between my heart and my mind on this topic. But who cares of mind in matter of love my heart won and I did¡K I messaged her ¡§Hi¡¨ it was around 7:30pm she was online though she read my message but didn¡¦t care to reply. I shut my desktop down at 8:00pm and went to terrace. Things changed in the morning I was the happiest person of this universe but with the coming dusk it was seemed to be opposite. The girl who fueled me in the morning made break down in the lovely evening.
I was looking at the moon which was playing hide and seek with the clouds and feeling the breeze which was touching me in that mid of March. I was sad, the precious day ended with making me feel alone. I thought of friend and my girl and slept.
The next morning after a sound sleep I woke up at 9:30am I was still on the bed when I switched on my phone and enabled my data and after that I immediately logged into my Facebook account which showed me message from my girl. Again it felt like first bite of bread after hundred days of hunger. I was happy to see her name flashed in my inbox her message was ¡§hello ¡§ and added with ¡§sorry I was busy a bit so I couldn¡¦t reply you yesterday since my brothers were with me¡¨ her message was at 6 in the morning this message confirmed me that her family was too strict as of mine. She belonged from UP and up to my knowledge peoples from UP and Bihar are often too strict to their children¡¦s. So that was might be the reason that she didn¡¦t reply me the last night.
I wanted to talk to her so that she could know me well. Now days, most of the boys are not trustworthy and girls think that every boys are the same. Though I was not like the most.
I was much serious about her. And I needed to prove her that how much I loved her and for proving I needed to talk to her. Fortunately she was online at that moment; I dared to message her ¡§hi¡K..good morning¡¨ in the very next moment my message was seen I don¡¦t know whether she was waiting for my text or it was just a co incidence; may be that it was a co incidence though the 1st statement stuck me and increased my heart beat¡K..her text arrived my inbox wishing me good morning we started formal chatting like our ICSE exams, which schools she was joining, toughness of economics paper, results etc. ¡K¡K..etc. ¡K..Etc.¡Kit continued till 10 am. The time I was under blanket. From toes to head blanket was covering me, I was hugging a side pillow and only the breath and the heart beat was breaking the silence of my room.
She wanted to go somewhere... She clarified... ¡§Talk to you later on¡¨ and went offline. I wanted to talk more with her and wished to had supernatural powers of Bengali baba ka jadu and all so as I could stop her from going. I being normal human being couldn¡¦t rely on Bengali baba and all except could I do wait for her to come back online again.
A week later¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K
With passing days, she was knowing me well and I too, at some point we used to had informal communication too. She was adding bit and bit of water to fill the glass. We used to text for longer time but never gave a clue that I love her. I was afraid as our friendship relation might get in danger. She was at her ¡¥Nani¡¦s¡¦ house from the day ICSE exams were over. She used to be online most of the time not for the purpose of chatting but for playing online games. I couldn¡¦t remember the name of that girlish game. Every now and then her Facebook wall was updated saying can you beat my score, I scored this much.
It was 2nd April it¡¦s all about the day I was waiting for; I remember around 3 o¡¦ clock we were chatting and I was full of confidence on that day. The day I was going to express my love feelings for her, my confidence was full till the time come I got nervous. I gathered my full guts and said ¡¥I need to tell you something¡¦, she replied ¡§hmm bolo¡¨. I drank full glass of water and started telling my feelings for her. I planned lot of things to say her in a very romantic way but couldn¡¦t able to do so. I forgot everything which I prepared to say her. I typed ¡§jo main kehne jaa raha hoon use seriously lena, I am not joking at all¡K. Will you be my life partner? I want to share everything with you, tumhare sath apna future dekhta hoon, I love you. I love you lottttttt¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡Kand much more promises desire and love I added¡¨
After a silence of couple of minutes she said, ¡§Rahul aaj 1st april nahi hai¡¨ I replied ¡§aaj 1st april nahi hai tabhi to tumhe keh raha hoon, I really love you¡¨
She was shocked to know she went offline without saying anything. I don¡¦t know whether I did the right thing or did I make her upset? Will she ever talk to me? Where did she went I was tensed many things was striking me. In the evening at 7pm she came online and messaged me,¡¨ Rahul ye nahi ho sakta and I am sorry tum aisa kuch feelings rakhte ho mere liye mai kavi sochi v nahi thi¡¨, and went offline.
After her text I didn¡¦t respond anything and l left her to stay alone.
Days and days passed I tried to show her much I love her but every time she denied. I tried each and everything but didn¡¦t get a positive result. I failed¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K..
PART-3
Eight months later *************
¡§Babu why didn¡¦t you talk to papa regarding English tuition, you have promised me that you was going to talk this Sunday evening¡¨ Guys you must be thinking who is babu here? Then let me clear you ¡¥Babu¡¦ here is none other than me and the girl shouting those question is my queen, my life, my love, my baby, and more importantly my ¡¥Nishika¡¦ to whom earlier I confessed my feelings of love for her. Initially she denied my love but finally she accepted me as her love after few months of my proposal. We were in love. It sounds quite crazy but it¡¦s true. Many things happened within these eight months. After coming of her in my life my Facebook relationship status updated to committed, she became password of my Gmail and twitter id and my phone went to silent mode. After all she was mine now.
Nishika accepted me on 5th July and fortunately we were in the same school and Accounts tuition. I was so lucky to have her in my life; my happiness was beyond my limits, I never expected to get pampering and caring as she used to do. There were no such words to express how we were crazy about us. Sometimes it seemed that she loved me more than I did. I remembered in those chilling nights she used to go on the terrace just to have a talk with me; she shifted herself to her study room so that her younger naughty brother who couldn¡¦t disturb us from texting. Since childhood Nishika¡¦s family accompanied her every time she never stayed alone, her big phobia was darkness and butterflies. After coming of mine in her life she did unexpected things which were totally unbelievable. Nishika¡¦s family was a joint family, they stayed in a giant house they had a big car and lot of luxury stuffs. I came to know all about these after being in relationship. She was rich and her family was quite modern as compared to mine.
Nishika changed my life too; a poor boy in studies progressed to an average one, my talking skill changed, my anger was bit controlled, rarely I found myself in the cricket ground; where every evening I used to go. I preferred walking than taking bus; and started saving money to buy a present for my love. Monthly expenditure on phone increased though I loved to make recharges for her.
Our life was running perfectly on the track, we were the wheels of our future dreams and our dreams were smoothly moving to convert it into reality. After 6 months of being in relationship we moved to new phase where romance stepped in. The past six months we talked about everything except doing romance. We both were shy to start on this topic somehow I managed to speak on this. Guys, let me remind you that here romance doesn¡¦t mean we did in reality, it¡¦s just in chats (messages). In reality having romance was next to impossible. Even I never gathered courage to speak on these matters on phone calls, we relied on texts. Though I knew she won¡¦t allow me to speak orally on such topics. Nishika was different from all and this was one of the reasons for which I was mad for her.
On 26th December at 10:15 pm we were back at our respective living rooms. After our dinner we usually used to be online at sharp 10¡¦o clock once or twice in a blue moon; someone got sometimes late. We talked about the day we spent in school, we talked about the dinner and more importantly and compulsorily I asked her about the medicine which she took or not? Every day she used to forget and I made her remember. Nishika used to take medicine since last year, still her illness was not fully recovered I don¡¦t know how the doctor was; sometimes I felt to give that bitter medicine to that stupid doctor. I just hated him for giving much bitter medicine to my innocent baby.
When I asked her about the medicine she took or not, she replied ¡§babu aaj nhi na, plz I¡¦m in the room and don¡¦t wanna go down to take medicine again, tumhe chhod k nhi jana avi¡¨ I forced her to go but she said a single thing which made me to do whatever she wants ¡§Shona¡¨. I was killed whenever she used to call me by this name. Hardly my heart melts in the matter of medical though I allowed her what she wanted.
We started our conversation and at some point I said ¡§in today¡¦s accounts tuition u were looking damn hot on white top, mann kar raha tha sab k samne tumhe zor wala hugggg kar loon¡¨ she said ¡§ achaaaaa¡¨ with a big smile. I love the way she said ¡§achaaaa¡¨ and added ¡§himmat to hai nahi, aaye bada hug karne waley ƒº¡¨ . ¡§himmat ki baat mat karo, I can do anything¡¨ I said. Our chat continued in jolly mood it was around 11:30 pm and that moment something was happening to me which I wasn¡¦t able to express her. I don¡¦t know what I was speaking and doing my hands were shivering, my breath was fast I was filling thirsty where no water can put out my thirst, I was sweating at 10 degree Celsius. I said to my baby ¡§please come closer to me¡¨. She questioned me ¡§what happened?¡¨ I knew she also knew what was happening to me and I was quite sure that something the same she was facing there. When we were out of control she hugged me and I companied her, we kissed each other not the regular one it was special, my lips were locked into her. She was sleeping on me and I was moving my hand at her back. I kissed on her forehead followed by nose, chin, neck, and everywhere. We did everything that night. I wished to have those romantic nights every day and night. I was complete then we slept at 4 in the morning.
PART-4
After our class 11 exam got over I joined English tuition and kept the promise which I made her earlier. In that tuition there were not many chaos of students likes our accounts tuition. We were only three. Me, my love and her best friend Poorva Pandey. The environment of that room was cool and teaching experience of chandrakant sir was just awesome. We used to joke, enjoy and share our experiences, sir used to tell us how couples bunked classes where he used to teach, how Bengali kids reacted when he spoke in English and much more funny things were there which made us laugh. I and my love started spending time alone. We used to reach tuition earlier and her friend used to come late. Poorva helped us a lot to spend time with together. Sir knew everything about our relationship but never pretended. Sir left us alone till everyone joins.
Impossible itself says I am possible and our next to impossible thing turned possible in the mid of May. At 7:10pm Nishika¡¦s dad dropped her at English tuition. I was standing apart and waiting her dad to return. No sooner did he return than I followed to tuition. When I entered, the room smelled as usual of my love fragrance. I was habituated with the perfume which she used to put every day. I could seek my love among 1000s of people. The fragrance was very different; I have never smelt of that fragrance ever in my life. I don¡¦t know whether it was imported perfume or it was my love. When she stood up to let me go Inside, I started staring at her. She was looking something different that day. Her silky and soft untied hair was waving in the air, her large dazzling chocolate brown eyes were sparkling like stars and winking at me, her lips were blossom soft which was dabbed with baby pink lip balm, her beautiful chin made me fall every time I saw her; actually I didn¡¦t have words to write for her chin¡¦s beautiness, I like her chin the most. Her attire was black denim and fitted sky blue top printed with ¡¥happy birthday to me¡¦.
Softly she slapped on my hand and said ¡§bas karo ab jao bhi¡¨ I took my seat just beside her after that she added with sweet smile ¡§poorva called me up and informed that she wasn¡¦t coming¡¨. I was happy to get that news as we were going to spend full ninety minutes alone.
Dazzling of rain started and within minutes it rained like cat and dog. The rain was making me more romantic, we were viewing the showers through the window. Suddenly sir stepped in and said he was going to pick her wife from bus stand as she wasn¡¦t having umbrella and went away.
The very next moment we were alone, Nishika was siting just near to me and I was looking at her, she was reading her text book. I don¡¦t know whether she was nervous or uncomfortable. I called her ¡§Nishika¡¨ but she didn¡¦t reply. Her right hand was on her thigh so I smoothly grasped her hand with my left hand. Smiling at me mischievously she pulled my hand down. My heart was beating as fast as it seemed it would come out of my chest. Again I called her but she didn¡¦t reply, I shifted myself towards her and slowly turned her face toward me and asked ¡§are you comfortable na?¡¨ she nodded her head with winking of her beautiful eyes. Now her fingers were busy in tearing papers, I whispered I love you she smiled and made her eyes down which were still busy with the papers. I took the paper from her hand and kept aside, placed her beautiful soft hands between mine and promised her ¡§I¡¦ll love you till my last breath¡¨. I gathered courage and sweetly kissed on her soft hands. Slowly I pulled her face up to mine but her eyes were still stuck down. I went closer to her face and heard a rapid breath which she was inhaling. I kissed on her cheek but she didn¡¦t respond, again I dare to put my lip at her and gently rubbed it. Then she broke her silence and hugged me, her lips were into mine and we were sucking. It continued for more than a minute, I don¡¦t remember who closed the eyes first.
I pulled out my lips first as her hairs was tickling in my ear. After she arranged her hair again I passionately kissed on her neck, on chin, on eyes, on forehead. After I kissed on her ear she felt something which made us lip lock again. We were passionately kissing each other till the time we heard the horn of motorcycle. Nishika rushed from the chair arranged her hair and said ¡§aa rahe hain papa¡¨. Rain stopped so her dad came early to pick up, till sir didn¡¦t back. She packed her bag kissed me and parted. I too left as soon as sir came back.
PART-5
Happiness killed our hunger and we were online at 9:30pm. The girl who was silent few hours back was now talking lot, and as a good lover I was listening to her. At some point I asked her how she felt. She replied ¡§definitely bohtttttt accha, and you?¡¨ I answered in naughty way ¡§pata nahi next class mein jarur btaunga¡¨ she exclaimed ¡¥Hawwwwww Besharm!!!!!!!!! No next class ab¡¦ I laughed and she too. I said about the body lotion, lip balm and powder I inhaled that evening. She burst into laughter and asked me to describe the taste. I added ¡§lip balm toh fir v thik tha but the awful powder felt like I am in desert suddenly sweet breeze came and filled my mouth with sand not the actual one but the white one¡¨ she laughed carefree after knowing this and I joined her. She was very happy and as she was happy, I was happy too.
I was so mad about her that just to look her happy like she was then, I can intake bottle of powder without any hesitation. Our chat continued till late night but laughter predominated.
The next followed classes I didn¡¦t get the taste of powder; she gave up all the cosmetics, only she used to put was lite lip balm and kajal, still her beauty not moved by an inch. Our life was going perfectly on the right track we were the happiest couple of the universe.
PART-6
There is an old saying after every happiness sad comes. Since it¡¦s a part and parcel of life and hence it was proved in our relationship. It dropped like a dynamite on me when I read my baby¡¦s text ¡§mumma ko humare bare mein sb pta chal gaya hai, she took my phone anyhow I am messaging you, plz don¡¦t text or call¡¨. Her message freezes me from top to bottom, I didn¡¦t know how to react on it, my blood stopped flowing and my mind was not working. I rushed to my sister priyanka and narrated everything even she was much tensed than me. Though she motivated me and asked to call Nishika¡¦s friend to know exactly what happened. As her suggestion I called her close friend Ishita to know the matter what happened exactly and to know how my love was. Ishita narrated me everything and asked me to call Nishika¡¦s best friend Poorva pandey for more details. I immediately cut the call of Ishita and called poorva she described how Nishika¡¦s mother scolded her by saying ¡§school mein tum sab padhne jate ho yeh sb krne?¡¨ and much more things, she narrated and added ¡§Nishika ko bhtt tez fever hai¡¨ I was totally blank after knowing this I need to talk to my girl and how it was possible I don¡¦t know.
After every passing hours I used to call and text both of them to know the status of my love, but every time I heard ¡§Nishika se meri baat nahi ho pa rahi¡¨ I called more to Ishita than poorva. Ishita was bit closer to me than poorva. I knew I was disturbing her though my heart forced me every time and she was so sweet never spoke rude to me. She got scoldings from Nishika¡¦s mom still she tried every time whenever I asked her. I would never forget her favor for me.
In the evening I came to know from Ishita my love was bit fine yet and even I came to know that my loves mumma cried. I was feeling so bad for her. I prayed to God for making everything normal, for good health of my love and asked God to punish me if I did anything wrong and not to be so cruel to my love and her pretty mom.
The next morning at 10:00 Nishika called me up, she said hello in very soft voice from her low pitch voice any one can get that she was not well, I asked her how are you? She tried to say something but I couldn¡¦t get her. She was really not well, tear rolled from my eyes. Again she tried to speak and this time I got her. She said ¡§better from previous day and I will be all right within an hour, nothing had happened to me itna tension mt lo tum¡¨ and gave a smile. I knew it was a fake smile just to get energized. And added ¡§mumma is talking properly with me so everything would gonna be normal thoda time do, aur haan don¡¦t try to call me or text jab tk mera na aay, Aapna khyal rakhna babu¡¨ I said you too and she cut the phone.
I was the worst boyfriend that moment ¡¥chah kr k v kuch nahi kr pa raha tha¡¦ my girl was suffering from high fever at that crucial moment and how unfortunate I was as couldn¡¦t company her.
Within a week everything returned to normal condition, my love was doing well, her mom returned her cell back and again we were back to our previous stage where love, romance, care and new experiences made our relationship much stronger. I thanked God for accepting my prayer.
PART-7
The road diverged but I couldn¡¦t travel the both. After our ISC results declared we were in the different path Nishika chose B.com as she wanted to be a CA and my focus was in corporate sector so I went for my business management studies. We moved to different colleges, we were been taught different papers so there was no valid reason to take tuition together. We were been physically separated by nature though our bond was as strong as earlier. We use to see each other once in a blue moon, but our chatting and talking didn¡¦t reduce even it increased with passing days.
Without fighting relationship
Seems to be death and we never gave an opportunity for it. As every relationship we use to have small and silly argument and our anger didn¡¦t continue for more than couple of hours. We used to laugh after for the reason we were arguing after sort out. Mainly we argue for IPL matches as I was die heart supporter of Mumbai Indians and her team was Kolkata knight Riders, our argue on the basis Kapil sharma, made fun of her wife sumon, I love that and as a girl she doesn¡¦t like, her Facebook password named after SRK as a lover I was bit jealous so I used to say bad about him this is also the reason of our argument and lots of silly and cute reasons were there for our argument.
One of the biggest reasons for our argument was there too. It was not so silly, not so cute, not so funny and not so forgettable easily. Every time my heart include in this fight and the reason was not other than her best friend Poorva Pandey. Yes you are reading correctly, its Poorva Pandey!!! We use to have fight after every second week. As you all guys know that ¡§ yeh sala sab best friend ka chutiyapaah hai¡¨
Most of my friends and well-wishers used to advise me ¡§agar tum aapna future NJ k sath sochte ho toh NJ ko kaho poorva se dur rahe¡¨ here friends indicate male and female part, even poorva¡¦s closest friend used to say me. They used to tell ¡¥poorva can do anything for her mean¡¦ and ultimately poorva proved everything right as she used to leave Nishika in college and return back alone, she doesn¡¦t company her in need , poorva used to tell bad words for me ¡¥tu galt ki relation mein aa k¡¦ ETC¡K¡K. , she used to call Nishika every morning and talk very nicely so she could get pick up and drop up facility by her new scooty to respective CPT classes, and much more reason which I would not like to narrate here. I never wanted to separate them I just wanted to show the mirror of truth. My love was very innocent and I don¡¦t liked these things were happening with her.
PART-8
Truth never struggles to finds its way and I don¡¦t know why Nishika spread rumor about our breakup, we were perfectly doing well, I used to ask about this f***ing reasons she used to claim that she didn¡¦t want anybody knows about our relation. Quite strange!!! After 2 1/2years informed everyone about our separation. Though as a good lover I used to tell people as she asked me to describe and I stopped talking to those whom I scripted. I felt might be any family reason or any such that¡¦s why she was lying to everyone. My Nishika was not like that she never lied to anyone and even she knew I just hate dishonest people.
PART-9
Three years passed in our relationship things started deteriorating by passing days. Love and romance were much far from us. Our relationship stuck on DEMAND, ORDER and f***ing SORRY. Nishika joined new CPT tuition somewhere in Howrah maidan and there after her order to me was not to text her in the tuition and the reason was ¡§I don¡¦t wanna text in front of poorva pandey¡¨ after that I was been blocked everywhere Facebook, phone, messaging, hangout, Whatsapp and hike. After returning she used to unblock me, Nishika used to chat in front of her parents whom she scared a lot but never in her tuition. Blocking and unblocking continued¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K
The first time I was against my beloved whatever she forbade me to do I used to do the same. It was big mistake of my life. My curiousness made me to do every time. Whenever I was been ordered not to text and she blocked me then only I use to message her from way2sms where nobody can block me. I was bored with different reason wanted to know the exact reason why she blocks me? Why she avoid in front of poorva? What poorva wants? What poorva earing her up? Was poorva seeking for her new jeeju? One most important question did she love me? If yes then why was she avoiding me, if NO then why was not she clarifying it?
I believe her more than myself though lots of fishy thoughts were running in hard disk of my mind. I just needed to be cleared once. Guys I was so deeply in love with her just to see her happy I could do anything, if she had asked me to leave her as if she has started liking someone else there after without putting any full stop or coma I would definitely move from her life. But she was not clarifying anything which overloaded me lots of stress.
PART-10
28th July 2015 at 7:10pm, Nishika returned from normal classes and she was online. That day we didn¡¦t had chat since morning so I messaged her ¡¥hi¡¦ , she was online but didn¡¦t bothered to reply me, I thought she might be busy so after couple of minutes I nudge her two times and added ¡§busy ho kya?¡¨ she responded ¡§kya hai tumko?¡¨ I don¡¦t know the reason why she was angry after that I text her ¡§kya hua baby itna naraz kyun ho?¡¨ and again I typed ¡§tuition se wapas aa kr kuch khaye the?¡¨ she replied rudely ¡§tumse matlab¡¨. Our text average ratio was 3:1 after 3 or 4 message from me I used to get 1 reply. She was posing this attitude since last 2 months.
It hurted me lot whenever I was treated like that. I don¡¦t remember how much tears rolled from my eyes. I asked Nishika to unblock me on Whatsapp as multiple times shifting on hike and whatsapp making delay in message. Her feedback ¡§nahi karenge unblock kya kar lega tu?¡¨ and blocked me on hike too. I don¡¦t know what exactly was happening with me. I was sad and frustrated too. I wanted to know why I was treated like zoo animal? My anger made me to call her; though my number was blocked, I tried to call and text her from different numbers and through way2sms. Fortunately after 7-8 calls and 15 messages I was unblocked on hike and she said a thing which felt like thunderstorm felt at me, it felt like suddenly a racing car hit me. It paralyzed me I was half alive.
Her message ¡§I want break-up, don¡¦t wanna stay any more with you get lost from my life, And lot of things she added¡¨ Babu changed to Rahul, tum was replaced by ¡¥Tu¡¦, the girl who prayed for my healthy life now wished for my death and I was been abused. Things changed unexpected. Reason I don¡¦t know???????????????
A week later sawan brought the first shower of love. The season where couple gets more romantic, the season where distance are reduced, the season where millions of farmers are waited for. But this sawan I was alone, mohhabat didn¡¦t rained on me.
How could have I let my love go, I used to call her, text her, convenience her, beg from my love and as usual sorry for what I don¡¦t know, every time I was insulted but never bothered about that. The day of Raksha Bandhan Nishika was very happy in her happiness she said such a thing which made me more confused ¡§I love you but don¡¦t wanna stay with you Rahul¡¨ what kind of statement was that I really don¡¦t know. Beggigns and sorrys continued for 5 months. Every day and night I begged for one more chance, I promised her that I won¡¦t message her from way2, I was ready to do whatever she wanted, but every time I failed¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K
The water reached its height when I decided to move on permanently from her happy life, and kept a promise want to meet you for the last time after that I won¡¦t message or call you. She accepted my proposal and dates were fixed. This meeting didn¡¦t energize me as previous one, even it made me weaker.
Three days later I received her message, she denied of coming as she added her friend advised ¡§akele mt ja tu safe nahi hai, rahul tujhe harm krne k liye bula raha hai¡¨. It was like WTF!!!!! I don¡¦t care of her friend¡¦s advice but the girl who already knew me for more than 3 years how could she think like that??? I called for just to see her last time and nothing else. Then, First time I forced her for come and after an hour I got her message I will come but poorva will accompany me.
I don¡¦t know why poorva was coming with her even I don¡¦t call her at isolated place it was Haldiram¡¦s at Exide in the noon. While returning from college at evening I was not well and lot of tension were running in mind I took my cell out and typed a message ¡§Breakup toh karwa hi di mera ab jb main milne ja raha hoon last time toh v tumhe piche-piche aana hai, what you want yaar?¡¨ and this text was successfully delivered to my not so favorite poorva pandey.
After reading my text poorva pandey shaken up and replied ¡§shame on you rahul a girl left you, she deserve much more better than you, you were just playing game with her, you spoiled her life and you were getting benefit so you were in relationship and much more thing she said to me in very rude way¡¨ even I too. Every true lover would treat the same what I did. Even poorva said she will show my status. (Still those messages are with me).
I reported everything to Nishika but she didn¡¦t say anything to her best friend. I don¡¦t know what advantage had I taken? It might be Nishika¡¦s expensive gifts for me and I could not return her the same, might be that benefit poorva was talking about. I decided to return her gifts as I didn¡¦t want to keep any benefit on me. I called Nishika near my house and she came this time. I returned her unsealed parker pen, imported deo which was half used, romantic candle set, branded wrist watch, cards and everything she gifted me. Even I never asked to pay for me or recharge my number, whenever Nishika used to call me I cut her call and called her back then how could have I taken benefit from her??? It was out of syllabus, only poorva can solve it. Poorva compared my love with money. After I returned gifts I came back to home locked up my room and cried like anything, she might sob and someone celebrated.
23rd December was the last day I saw my love, I listened to her, I text her after that Nishika came only in my dreams. She made me happiest person just for 37 months and left me alone forever¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K.
Some days later I recharged poorva¡¦s phone as just some sort of benefit will be reduced from my head. She clarifies her intension was not so such. She spoke those words in anger. I don¡¦t know whether she clarified was true or not but that moment of time I said ¡§I forgive you¡¨ but is it possible guys to forgive the girl who separate me from my future? If poorva would abuse me or harm me then definitely I would turn her deed to my bad dreams, I can¡¦t forget the dirty game she played to me, even I can¡¦t take any action to her as she was my love¡¦s best friend. Except can I do is cursing her from my melancholy soul.
I don¡¦t know how Nishika is now? How she is doing? Is her illness fully recovered or not? Does she use to takes her medicine at time? I don¡¦t know anything about her. I don¡¦t have contact with her. I can¡¦t do anything except praying for her and missing her¡K¡K¡K
¡§Kaali kaali khali raaton se.. hone lagi hai dosti,
khoya khoya inn raahon mein ab mera kuch bhi nahi,
har pal har lamha main kaise sheta hoon,
har pal har lamha main khud se ye kheta rheta hoon,
tujhe bhula diya o¡K.tujhe bhula diya o o
fir kyun teri yaadon ne mujhe rula diya¡K¡K¡K¡K¡K.¡¨
The present
Somehow my days are passed but nights are bulk of pain, my cuts are recovering but wounds are still the same. After my relationship was been killed I moved to depression where I just eat to survive, speak to prove I am still alive. It¡¦s seems everything ended for me. I use to lock myself in room for most of the time, my sleep is reduced. This situation made my family to think about. My dad presented me a laptop so I could spend time on that; he sent me in a vacation of north and south India so as I can feel fresh. I was much surer that I would marry that girl so I use to narrate everything to my sister and after she left me, I stopped talking to my sister.
One my special friends Sikandar is helping me lot to come up with the situation, he use to come every day by skipping his valuable work just to make me laugh. I never laughed on his joke I just laugh when he use to laugh. His laughing is quite different from all. Exactly like ROFL. He is very good person.
My amitians friends Ankur, Rohit, Aditya, Sourav, Ranit and all are helping me and lot to cope up. They never give a feeling of loneness. Each and every time they use to call me, message me, use to send me a joke and many crazy things they are doing. Even they fools started seeking girl for me but they don¡¦t know,¡¨ no beautiful attraction can attract me now.¡¨
I thank all of them who really care for me and motivating me. Thankyou Arka for helping me whenever I needed, and thanks a lot for creating such a lovely cover photo. Thank you for reading my unrevealed love story. You can write me on [email protected] or follow me on twitter #followrahul_ray
Thank you.
April 2, 2016
Rahul Ray
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