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- Story Listed as: True Life For Adults
- Theme: Drama / Human Interest
- Subject: Aging / Maturity
- Published: 03/31/2017
A letter to my Old Friends.
Born 1951, M, from Wilmington NC, United StatesI haven’t written you guys in a long while. My brain trust!
However, I find myself sipping tea tonight and reflecting on some of my life, and my future. I always thought I would miss Comedy…I don’t. I went to watch a young Comedian do a benefit show the other night, he had a great set. In fact, for his age (32) it was a wonderful set, because I was one of the younger members of the audience and playing to a gulf of thirty years of experience that they have, and you …do not- is not easy.
I enjoyed the show, and only had a tiny twinge of wanting a crack at the audience. Mostly though, I just enjoyed the evening. People laughing at humor that doesn’t attack, just makes you laugh out loud- is its own reward. I was happy for him. Been there, done that, didn’t even enter my mind. I was an audience and not a colleague. It was freeing.
My friend Tim, and my new acquaintance Marc, are both super active folks. I don’t think I am cut out for that anymore. I do write a lot of stories, and I love my long walks, where I can think, daydream and percolate the meaning of life. LOL But I don’t want to DO anything anymore. I don’t know if that is a function of age, or just my own life slowing itself down to let how wonderful life is seep into my conscious mind. Life is remarkable. Really.
I look back at that little strange red headed kid standing on the sidewalk on a hot summer day in 1956 - playing with his cap gun, and later that day having my “jail” stolen by some creep along with my rifle, canteen, and knife. My fault for leaving it on the sidewalk when I went in to eat lunch. I did save my two silver pistols, and my western holsters though.
My mom told me that I wasn’t truly upset that someone took my stuff, but that I was actually happy that someone got some toys to play with. I think most of my life has been like that. I always got something good out of it, so much so, that I had stuff to give away.
Looking back at that same summer day, there is no way on this Earth that I could have known the life that lay in front of me. The people that would be in it, some for a bit, some for a long while, some forever, and some - only when needed. It has been a remarkable life, but then again, they ALL are. I know that now. Being alive is a miracle that is so common place we all forget it is a miracle. Not when you are old. When you are old, you know what a gift it is, and that may be one of the great gifts of age.
There are negatives, a slip, a fall, a diagnosis, and your health, money,resources and perhaps, even your life are forfeit. But I don’t dwell on those at all. Dying, believe it or not, does not frighten me at all, I could go tomorrow with a smile on my face. How I die, well that does frighten me. I am all for dying peacefully in your sleep. LOL
Don’t get me wrong, I do not want to stop living. I like life. I am just pointing out that I did live. And loved it. The world will go on quite well without me, and maybe we aren’t supposed to figure that out until later in life. That way whatever culture, society, or system we live in (or under) can confuse us with their needs and not our own.
Would you really work fifty years at a “job” when you could have been walking on the beach, thinking, or learning new things? For some of us the answer is “yes.” Because, like me, you loved what you were doing, so it wasn’t a job. Most folks don’t get that gift.
My best friend Ed, told me a long time ago- that after that first year or so of retirement, you change from proving you are still valuable, necessary, and alive, to a zen like state where every day is your day - period. Your mantra becomes: “Mañana.” How right he was, and is.
I find myself in much the same state I was in during summer vacations in my grade school days; a long glorious day filled with only the stuff I came up with to do that day. I ate when I wanted to, slept when I wanted to, and played, studied, or mingled, when I wanted to. The long days of summer seemed to melt together into a strangely paste of one wonderfully full day after another. Yet, at the end of the day, slipping into my pjs, I would be hard pressed to tell you what I did that day. Except that I enjoyed the hell out of it.
That is how I feel now. So far this year, I have had two things I had to do. And I have two more coming up. One in June, and one in September. And that is all I can handle. LOL If I want to do something - I do. If I don’t …well, I don’t. I can take a course on line and binge, or let it dangle there incomplete for weeks, either way , it doesn’t bother me. There is nothing hanging over my head.
I like this new found phase of life. The word busy is not necessary, nor is it accurate. My life is full, not busy. I don’t even need to prove I can still do things, just like the comedy show I went to. I am an audience now in my own life, and the show is just delightful.
Smiles, Kevin
A letter to my Old Friends.(Kevin Hughes)
I haven’t written you guys in a long while. My brain trust!
However, I find myself sipping tea tonight and reflecting on some of my life, and my future. I always thought I would miss Comedy…I don’t. I went to watch a young Comedian do a benefit show the other night, he had a great set. In fact, for his age (32) it was a wonderful set, because I was one of the younger members of the audience and playing to a gulf of thirty years of experience that they have, and you …do not- is not easy.
I enjoyed the show, and only had a tiny twinge of wanting a crack at the audience. Mostly though, I just enjoyed the evening. People laughing at humor that doesn’t attack, just makes you laugh out loud- is its own reward. I was happy for him. Been there, done that, didn’t even enter my mind. I was an audience and not a colleague. It was freeing.
My friend Tim, and my new acquaintance Marc, are both super active folks. I don’t think I am cut out for that anymore. I do write a lot of stories, and I love my long walks, where I can think, daydream and percolate the meaning of life. LOL But I don’t want to DO anything anymore. I don’t know if that is a function of age, or just my own life slowing itself down to let how wonderful life is seep into my conscious mind. Life is remarkable. Really.
I look back at that little strange red headed kid standing on the sidewalk on a hot summer day in 1956 - playing with his cap gun, and later that day having my “jail” stolen by some creep along with my rifle, canteen, and knife. My fault for leaving it on the sidewalk when I went in to eat lunch. I did save my two silver pistols, and my western holsters though.
My mom told me that I wasn’t truly upset that someone took my stuff, but that I was actually happy that someone got some toys to play with. I think most of my life has been like that. I always got something good out of it, so much so, that I had stuff to give away.
Looking back at that same summer day, there is no way on this Earth that I could have known the life that lay in front of me. The people that would be in it, some for a bit, some for a long while, some forever, and some - only when needed. It has been a remarkable life, but then again, they ALL are. I know that now. Being alive is a miracle that is so common place we all forget it is a miracle. Not when you are old. When you are old, you know what a gift it is, and that may be one of the great gifts of age.
There are negatives, a slip, a fall, a diagnosis, and your health, money,resources and perhaps, even your life are forfeit. But I don’t dwell on those at all. Dying, believe it or not, does not frighten me at all, I could go tomorrow with a smile on my face. How I die, well that does frighten me. I am all for dying peacefully in your sleep. LOL
Don’t get me wrong, I do not want to stop living. I like life. I am just pointing out that I did live. And loved it. The world will go on quite well without me, and maybe we aren’t supposed to figure that out until later in life. That way whatever culture, society, or system we live in (or under) can confuse us with their needs and not our own.
Would you really work fifty years at a “job” when you could have been walking on the beach, thinking, or learning new things? For some of us the answer is “yes.” Because, like me, you loved what you were doing, so it wasn’t a job. Most folks don’t get that gift.
My best friend Ed, told me a long time ago- that after that first year or so of retirement, you change from proving you are still valuable, necessary, and alive, to a zen like state where every day is your day - period. Your mantra becomes: “Mañana.” How right he was, and is.
I find myself in much the same state I was in during summer vacations in my grade school days; a long glorious day filled with only the stuff I came up with to do that day. I ate when I wanted to, slept when I wanted to, and played, studied, or mingled, when I wanted to. The long days of summer seemed to melt together into a strangely paste of one wonderfully full day after another. Yet, at the end of the day, slipping into my pjs, I would be hard pressed to tell you what I did that day. Except that I enjoyed the hell out of it.
That is how I feel now. So far this year, I have had two things I had to do. And I have two more coming up. One in June, and one in September. And that is all I can handle. LOL If I want to do something - I do. If I don’t …well, I don’t. I can take a course on line and binge, or let it dangle there incomplete for weeks, either way , it doesn’t bother me. There is nothing hanging over my head.
I like this new found phase of life. The word busy is not necessary, nor is it accurate. My life is full, not busy. I don’t even need to prove I can still do things, just like the comedy show I went to. I am an audience now in my own life, and the show is just delightful.
Smiles, Kevin
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