As I sit under this huge banyan tree to pen down my electrifying experiences in this detox Centre, I notice each branch embracing another in a tight hug.it resembled snakes making love as they hide away from human glare. Few days after my admission here in this camp, this tree has been my best friend. He knows when I am up or when I felt low. It may sound exaggerated but this is my own interpretation of its shedding leaves according to my mood swings.
I have got myself admitted to this health village cum detox center, few kilometers away from my residence. No one had prescribed me to get any sort of treatment but I myself felt the need to take a break from everything. Everything included my work, my folks and me myself in all respect. I wanted to forget who I am or who I want to be. I wanted all boundaries to loosen, letting my inner self flow to its own rhythm, feel my soul and break free without any limits. I wanted to wake up listening to the song of cuckoo, feel the earth, take bath in the lake, dance like a peacock and move around as if no one is watching.
I wanted to let my hair uncombed, leave my face with its natural shine on , let my bronze tinged lips breathe free without traces of my favorite lip color. I wanted to wear loose clothes, not clinging on to my curves, leave my feet as they were to sense moisture without nail paint. I wanted to laugh and cry louder without any reason and feel lighter.my skin shall now breathe easy as they won’t be subjected to stretching and itching during the waxing sessions. I wanted to sit on that rock and sing aloud with the mountains echoing my nasal tone back.
I wanted to pen down my thoughts for no one to read and judge. I wanted to make a paper boat and sail it in mud. I wanted to take a dip in that muddy river and emerge holier without my clothes on. I wanted to move with naked feet and lie down on the grass . I wanted to drape myself in unstitched saffron and not to bother as wind undrape its folds as per his needs.
I wanted to form an unnamed bond with the yogi in charge of this centre. The early morning yogas with him gave my body the heat it needed. His stretchable bare body gave new dimensions of intimacy which was alien to me.Every evening as I walked to the woods to take a round, I found him sitting on the rock with a stoic face as if waiting for me so that he can join. And the innumerable hugs he gave me in between made my body shiver.
The sixty plus yogi had well-built structure, strong and poised. His tight arms gave my wandering thoughts the shelter they needed. He taught me the secret of chakras in my body, his long pointed fingers drawing circles as he explained each chakra. He taught me the best way of using a bottle. He made me realize the best things of being a woman..
I wanted to feel unrestrained... feel Free...
I wanted to be freed...Felt...Caressed
I wanted to be let unjudged …
I loved this space of solitude...it gave me peace
It taught me to lead life in my own terms…unconditionally