Sighing sunshades and talking rocks(Dill McLain) Cedric was sitting there at 2500 meters altitude on a wooden bench in front of a mountain hut. He was leaning forward, with his head supported in both hands, his elbows resting on the wooden table. In front of him was a big empty beer glass. He sat there motionless for over two hours. He was staring down to the valley but did not see the breathtaking view over valleys and mountains, which delighted everyone on this day of splendour. He was sitting there alone. It was a rather hot day and most tourists would take the cable car from the mid-station to the very top of the mountain, stay there and later take the cable car back to the valley. A handful of hikers passed the hut on this afternoon for a quick stop and a refreshing drink, before they continued their route. About five small groups of exceptionally skilled mountain climbers, in perfect sports clothes and equipped with professional material, were already for over two hours climbing the extremely steep grey rock wall. This was practically vertical - and therefore highly appreciated - and at a certain distance filled the whole vista looking from the wooden, wind protected platform behind the hut.

Of course, he briefly noted all of these aspects. However, he could enjoy not even the slightest part of it, because his world – his private world - had collapsed about two hours ago. Now he was sitting there, alone and with a broken heart, and he was persuaded that this was the end.

Cedric was a sales engineer for sports equipment, and very successful in his job. He was the prudent boss of a small department, and in his spare time, he was a passionate mountain climber. He even regularly took part in ascents to high summits abroad, for example in the Himalayas and also in South America. For about five years he was engaged to an attractive young woman who he had met on a train trip in India. He had just come back from thrilling trekking in the Himalayas, while she had come from a six weeks stay in an Ayurveda resort. This had first shocked him a bit because he could not really understand how one could spend so many weeks in a place doing nothing - just being occupied all day long indulging one’s own body. But she had seemed endlessly excited and happy and had been talking with passionate eyes about her daily Ayurveda program for almost two hours, that she somehow had fascinated him. She, on the other hand, had been attracted by his very sporty and healthy appearance, and after learning about where he just had been, she had seemed very impressed and been looking at him with adoring eyes. The two then had spent a few wonderful days in Bombay and had fallen in love. Both had probably thought that this had been just a mad holiday love, which would not last. But they exchanged their addresses and departed smiling – still filled with the joy of the past days – at the airport of Bombay. She had taken a plane to Lyon in France, while he flew back to Geneva in Switzerland.

In the following months, they had maintained almost daily phone contact, shorter or longer conversations. She after six months, one day had arrived in Geneva with several suitcases and bags, without informing him before, and moved in with him as if it had been the most normal thing in the world. She had already had a new job at a private bank in Geneva that had been arranged with her employer, at a related bank, in Lyon. Despite the fact that Cedric had been rather overwhelmed by this sudden change in his daily life, he at the same time had felt flattered and, of course, pleased. Therefore, he had brought a tremendous amount of understanding, readiness and goodwill into this relationship, and he by nature was a warm-hearted young man. But one thing he had made very clear to her from the very beginning, namely, that he would never give up his passion for mountain climbing. She had been smiling understandingly and then emphasizing that in turn, she would never give up her passion for Ayurveda - as well as some other treatments for body and soul, which had not disturbed him at all.

And so the two had been living together for over four years, forming a happy couple, sharing in a great harmonious daily life with all its ups and downs. Everything had seemed so natural and obvious, so that Cedric had intended, at the next best occasion, to ask her to marry him.

During a weekend in Paris, on an evening cruise on the Seine, Cedric finally had presented his proposal of marriage, holding a wonderful ring with an amethyst, flanked by two tiny brilliants, under her nose. She had jumped around his neck full of surprise and joy, and screamed loudly, “Yessss, I will!” so that all guests around the ship finally had applauded.

To his great astonishment and pleasure, she on the next morning had explained to him, that she would like to learn to climb rock walls and therefore wanted him to introduce her into this sport and teach her. He had been speechless and finally suggested to first begin with several lessons over the next weeks in a sports center with a climbing wall, and later spend a long weekend in a mountain village near to a special place with a suitable rock wall where several climbing grades could be practiced. And so from this time on, the two spent also a considerable amount of their spare time together, and Cedric had been surprised how well his partner had made progress in climbing. After about ten weeks, she had then insisted to try out her abilities on the said famous rock wall in the mountains.

He had booked a very romantic room in a rural bed and breakfast in the valley. They had arrived after noon up in the middle station of the cable car, from where one could walk on a narrow path over to the climbing wall. After walking half the way, she had stopped and sat down on a rock. Then, without further introduction she had told him, ice-cold and well prepared, that it all was over. She would right now get back to the cable car and then get her bag in the bed and breakfast place. By no means should he follow her or try to change her mind.

Cedric had stood there solidified - with the two climbing ropes hanging left and right from his shoulders and a face expressing total disbelief. He had only managed to stammer a few uncontrolled words because he had been so shocked. But she had cut him off immediately and said in a demanding tone, “Stop it and leave me alone, please! I have met another man, he is running an exclusive Ayurveda place in Lausanne. We have been meeting regularly for several months. There is no way to change things, I want him not you! Sorry about that!” She had left, walked quickly back down the stony path and finally disappeared into the cable car station. Cedric had stood there for almost an hour because he had not been able to believe what had just happened. He had seen several cable car cabins coming and going, and he had realized that she would not come back. With shivering legs, he moved down the other path leading to a mountain hut, where he had let himself sink on a wooden bench at the far edge of the terrace.

He could not explain it, however! Somehow he always had feared that such a thing could happen, because their apparent harmony had been too simple. But right now, too many thoughts were circling in his head. 'Why the hell did she accept my marriage proposal then, if she already was dating this Ayurveda man? Why did she stay with me and play a happy bride? And why all this fuss about learning to climb a rock wall, if she, in fact, would prefer to have exquisite oil dripping in the front of her head and dive into a pool full of flower blossoms? Why? Why? Why?' And to finish this first block of trying to understand his sudden tragedy, he screamed as loudly as he could, “Go to hell, cruel monster! One should actually warn this Ayurveda king. But who cares, he must find out things for himself! What a cruel woman!” And after this, he broke out in tears. Heavy tears were rolling down his cheeks and his fists were hitting the wooden table in intervals. Never in his life before, had he been weeping like this. His whole world seemed to fall apart.

“It seems to be a dramatic afternoon up here today, there is already another person with a broken soul in one of the bedrooms. If it goes on like this, we will advertise a heart-robbing virus! Can I bring you something, how about a large beer?” came a female voice from behind. Cedric turned slowly around and saw a sporty looking woman standing there, wearing a T-shirt, jeans and jogging boots. Around her waist, she wore a short apron and her jeans were full of white powder around the knees. She introduced herself as the warden and explained that she was just preparing some fruitcakes. She came closer, patted his shoulder and asked again, “What can I bring you, a beer?” Cedric nodded and turned his head back. When she came with the beer, she explained that she had to go on with her work in the kitchen, because on the next day there would be a larger group of wall climbers and there were plenty of things to prepare.

Cedric drank the large beer in one go and then for a long while sat there almost motionless, staring down to the valley, without really noticing the stunning view. In his head - tons of thoughts were racing, mainly bad ones. A wave of negative aspects seemed to flush him away, and he saw a large black deep hole opening up right in front of him - despite the fact that it was not there - and somehow wanting to pull him inside and swallow him. A strange noise above his head distracted him, it sounded like a sharp and long sighing. For a moment he got away from his dark hole and looked up to find out the cause of the sighing noise. The red sunshades were the cause, the wind moved them back and forth and the framework holding the cloth turning around the pole produced these sighing sounds. Sometimes, it was short and sharp, then another time elongated and plaintive. So that for Cedric these sunshades formed part of a crew - accompanying him in these difficult hours and somehow participated in his deep grief. Tears were again running down his face. And he began to hate himself because he had let such a thing happen to himself. Also because he had made all these efforts to contribute to that relationship, just finally to find out the naked truth, namely that he was a total fool. These thoughts hurt him so much. It was like long and sharp knives cutting his body apart, so that he could hardly bear it anymore. The heavily sighing sunshades completed the sad aura and again, this dark Kafkaesque hole appeared in front of him. He felt an endless weakness coming over him, combined with great disgust. The dark hole seemed to come closer and closer. “Maybe it is all over and the best thing is to jump from a high rock down onto the scree slope. End, over, Amen!” Now he was weeping heartbreakingly, and the sunshades sang their sighing accompanying song.

Cedric turned his body to the right and moved his eyes slowly along the high climbing rock wall of light grey rock, lengthwise and crosswise full of dark grooves. Suddenly, some of these black grooves started to move, form a mouth and talk to him, one after the other. “No, you do not give up now, not at all!” and “You must overcome this as soon as possible!” and then “Forget her, concentrate on your life and give another woman a chance, you will see, it will work!”

This was too much for Cedric. He rose from the wooden bench wildly gesticulating and shouted in full force toward the giant rock wall, “Are you mad? Another try with another woman? No, never! Wasn’t this cruel enough, what I just two hours ago had to experience? I have enough of any females, believe me!”

He sank again on the bench, watching the grey rock wall - totally sceptical but full of hope for its wise answer after his last argument. But the rock kept absolute silence and let him wait for quite a while, so that Cedric finally triumphantly screamed, “You see, now you do not know what to answer!” and then reached out for the huge beer, that the warden had obviously placed in front of him without him noticing it while dialoguing with the rock wall.

He was just about to take this first sip of beer through the white foam on top when he felt a tugging on his right trouser leg. He held the beer in his hand and looked under the table directly into two huge, dark blue eyes in a child’s face. It was a very small girl with an extremely friendly face that was framed by blonde curls. She was wearing a pink overall over a pink white striped shirt, and she was barefoot. Now she continued to tug on his leg and smiling at him all over her pretty face. She beamed at him in such a way that he for a moment forgot his whole misery and a bit shyly smiled back. Then he took a sip of the fresh beer and placed the glass back on the table, without taking the eyes from the blond angel, who incessantly pulled on his trouser leg full of joy, and giving squeaky sounds. Cedric turned his head and looked around to find some adult person accompanying the child or maybe the parents, however, there was nobody far and wide. He then concluded that it must be the daughter of the warden. Now the little beauty stretched out both arms, giving him her wonderful smile and obviously wanted to be picked up. Cedric looked left, then right, and finally slowly moved her up on his knees, which apparently seemed to please her. After a quick glance over to the rock wall, he thought that one of the grooves in the huge rock wall moved and spoke, “You see, life can change quickly from hell to paradise!” In exactly this moment, the blonde angel screamed happily, pointing with one hand to his face, “Daddy!”

Cedric sat there electrified and felt tempted to immediately move the girl away from his body or give her back to some invisible adult. He meant he heard the rock wall whispering, “Daddy, Daddy, D-add-y!” and realized that it was the little girl sitting on his knees and full of joy singing and repeating this same word to him all the time.

“Oh, there she is, she must have climbed over the little fence I built in the restaurant to keep her contained while I was busy with baking the cakes for tomorrow. Could you take care of her for about half an hour?” came the voice of the warden from the entrance door to the hut. Cedric nodded, what else could he do, and anyway he had all the time in the world. And so he began to talk to the little angel, pronouncing the names of the mountains, then of the villages down in the valley. She seemed to really enjoy it and happily pointed with her small hands to wherever he pointed.

Then after quite some time, he felt that there was some movement at the entrance door and he turned around, holding the child with both hands, to see what was going on. On the doorstep stood another young woman barefoot, with long, dark blonde, totally dishevelled hair wearing a huge shirt – obviously a men’s shirt – and looking extremely unhappy. Her face was tear-stained showing some remains of make-up, she seemed to have been weeping for hours. She stood there with an expressionless face, as if she had come out of a lake in the fog, and then said with a half-broken voice in his direction, “Thanks for guarding my kid, sorry, I will come back in a moment, I must first clean myself!” and before she could move back and disappear into the hut, the blonde angel on Cedric’s knees, happily screamed as loud as she could, “Daddy! Daddy!” pointing to his face. He did not know what to do or say, and just held the child and sat there, shrugging. The sad looking woman glanced at him from head to toe, her face without expression, and then turned around and moved into the hut.

The little angel on his knees continued to smile at him and call him Daddy so that Cedric began to find the whole scenario a bit unusual. He looked over to the rock wall – maybe to find an answer from there – but the sun had moved along in the meantime. Longer shadows were replacing the vertical grooves that were speaking to him before, and the rock wall now apparently was getting prepared for the coming night. And so he tried to explain to the little girl on his knees that soon the night would fall and flowers, trees, rocks would then go to sleep, also the animals and most birds, with the exception of the owls. The child listened to Cedric, quite fascinated.

“Yes, apropos the keyword night, at this point I must tell you, that you missed the last gondola and will, therefore, have to spend the night up here!” the warden announced with a certain amused undertone in her voice, while she was closing the sighing sunshades above his head. Then she moved on to do the same with the other sunshades. Before she went into the hut, she stated with a smile, “We will then all eat dinner together inside, as soon as my husband arrives from his control tour at the climbing rock. We will have vegetable soup and apple cake, and a glass of wine!”

The warden disappeared inside the hut and Cedric turned his head back, looking at the little girl who now was leaning on his chest and playing with a beer mat.

And then suddenly appeared the sad looking woman from before and sat down next to him. But now she looked like a newborn so that he first almost did not recognize her anymore. She obviously had gone through a general washing and repair session and even had put on light make-up. She wore trekking jeans and a large white T-shirt with the inscription in big, pink letters on the front “I slept at Waikiki beach” and on her feet, she wore turquoise sport sneakers. Looking at her face, it became immediately clear, from where the little girl inherited the eyes and the pretty face. Overall, a very attractive young woman. She held a face towel and a small terry towel under his nose and stated, “Hi, my name is Riva, I think you should also wipe away the traces of your tears, you look a bit like hell!” She took the little girl from his knees and while walking to the door of the hut, she muttered rather dryly, “Something must be wrong with this bloody grey mountain, it seems to destroy certain people’s lives and then let them dive into gloomy abysses!”

Cedric cleaned his face with the wet towel and then buried his face for a moment in the soft terry towel, and noticed the scent of a wonderful perfume. He slowly got up, took his bag with the two climbing ropes that he had dropped to the ground when arriving, and went inside the mountain hut. The female warden pointed along the short corridor and told him that room number eight in the very back was ready for him. Cedric nodded and went to deposit his things and look for the toilet. When he came back, the others already sat at a round table. Next to the warden sat a sporty man with a very friendly, suntanned face and strong arms, obviously her husband.

As soon as Cedric sat at the table, the little girl happily screamed over the table, “Daddy, Daddy, Daaa-ddy-y-y!” pointing with her spoon in his direction. The husband of the warden smiled over all his face and said, “Aha, you then came back - and the world is now fully in order again, I’m glad for you two!” Riva looked up to the ceiling and rolled her eyes jabbing for air. The warden’s wife hit on her husband’s arm and explained with a rather impatient voice, “Holy crab, must you now cause such confusion, he is not her missing husband who is with another one! This man arrived much later separately, and also in a sad condition, but we do not know why, but you should not confuse things!”

Cedric had a full understanding for the warden’s husband and explained, “Well, I arrived up here on this hill with my partner, with whom I lived for four and a half years in a partnership, actually we wanted to get married. But on the way to the climbing rock wall, she told me that she had fallen in love with another man, an Ayurveda expert. And she left. I carried myself to the terrace here and the whole terrible misery I’m in let me break out into tears for quite some time and the world was falling on my head!”

They all looked at him and the little angel screamed again, “Daddy, Daddy!” The warden’s husband looked from Riva to Cedric, from Cedric to the little girl, and then to his wife, who gave him signs lifting her eyebrows, and he finally shrugged and finished his soup. After dinner, the warden’s wife suggested in direction of Riva and Cedric, “You two probably have a lot to tell each other, I’ll leave cake and wine on the table, good night!” She took her husband by the hand and then both disappeared in the corridor.

“A good idea, I will put my daughter to bed and will come back!” stated Riva. Cedric nodded and poured another glass of wine.

After Riva returned, the two toasted and then told each other their individual misery of this day. Riva had decided the day before to come up to this place to surprise her husband, who had told her that he was practicing climbing on this specific rock wall with a group of enthusiastic climbing friends. Since about six months he had used to join these friends for different climbing enterprises. The little girl had the day before begun to pronounce the first word, namely ‘Daddy’, and therefore, she had thought to please him with this wonderful fact. After arriving at the middle station, she had walked over to the climbing rock wall to look out for her husband. However, she could not find him. There had been four groups practicing, but her husband had been in neither one. A bit shocked, she had called him on his mobile phone and after he had answered right away, she had confronted him with the fact that she was now standing up there in front of this giant rock wall looking for him. He had stammered and been searching for words. Finally, when she had insistently questioned him, he had confessed to being at a wellness hotel with another woman who he had known already for about eight months. He had played the helpless man feeling, on one hand, guilty, but on the other hand, not being able to solve things or find a suitable solution. Riva had paused a moment and then announced that he could stay where he was in his wellness hotel. He should within a week pick up all his clothes and belongings from their common flat, otherwise, she would contract a firm to do it. He had begged like a little boy to give him another chance and let them discuss the matter. However, Riva had not the slightest portion of understanding for such a selfish and mean behaviour. She reminded him, that she was old-fashioned and believed in sincerity, and could never pardon him lying for so many months.

She finished her report to Cedric with the words, “Sorry, that my little girl has confused you and the others by her permanent screaming ‘Daddy’, but now you have the explanation!” Suddenly, large tears rolled down her cheeks, and she whispered fragments of phrases that actually wished her husband and his new wellness flame to hell.

Cedric put his arm around her and patted her shoulders. For a while, they sat there without talking. Then he said, “Well, I have an idea, we both have lost our partners, have about a week of holidays, and should by no means let these cruel happenings fully disturb our precious free time before we have to go back to work!” Riva looked up to him and he could see the question marks in her eyes, and he continued, “We could rent a guest flat somewhere in the valley and try to have a holiday. We can talk whenever we feel like it, we can go for walks and excursions, what do you think?” She nodded, stood up and kissed him on his cheek, and while moving to the corridor, she added, “Very good idea, I agree!”

On the following morning, they took the first gondola down to the valley. They had collected their baggage from their individual hotel rooms and brought it to the guest flat Cedric had organized online the night before. The flat was on the top floor in a huge wooden farmhouse, now transformed into a bed and breakfast pension, and they, disposed of a large balcony, could also sit in the garden and there was a playground for the little girl, who obviously by no way missed her real father, but immediately accepted Cedric as replacement, calling him ‘Daddy’ all day long. Within the next days, apart from ‘Mummy’, a few more words were added to her vocabulary.

The three formed kind of a family and spent a wonderful week together. Yes, there were some times filled with grief and weeping as well as thundering cursing of their previous partners. But Riva and Cedric always consoled each other as really good friends do. After this holiday, they continued with their own lives, he in Geneva, she and the little girl in Lausanne, but they kept in regular contact, and planned to spend the next winter holidays together.

Four years after this dreadful afternoon full of tears and hopeless thoughts on the middle station of the said mountain, Riva and Cedric got married and about a year later, the blond girl got a little brother.

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