UNCLE HARRY(Jane Lockyer Willis) UNCLE HARRY
By Jane Lockyer Willis

Have you seen Uncle Harry of late?
He lives, I am told, in Notting Hill Gate.
But he used to live here, next door to me
Until that dreadfully embarrassing calamity.

Uncle Harry wore coloured bow ties,
Yellow or green, blue or flame.
His chequered suit was as smart as could be
And he was always seen out with his walking cane.

If he met you passing in the street
He would raise his hat, make a cordial remark.
Often lunched at Claridges Hotel
Before going for his walk in Regent's Park.

Now I've heard, but of course it may not be true,
That whilst taking his constitutional,
The calamity I mentioned a moment ago
Befell Uncle Harry; but the facts are disputable.

One of the monkeys from Regent's Park Zoo
Had managed quite nimbly to squeeze through its cage.
It was in all of the papers and on the news too
That Maisie the Chimp was on the rampage.

A call was put out by the BBC
That if anyone spotted this female monkey
To report at once via phone, email or text,
As it was making the walkers extremely jumpy.

Uncle Henry sauntering by the lake
Noticed something furry and large;
He approached it with caution as ever one would
In case the animal decided to charge.

He untied his flamboyant yellow bow tie
And approached with caution this hairy beast,
With one nimble move he lassoed the monkey
And dragged her by force to the south east gate.

He handed her in to a park keeper chap
Who startled and muttered and stuttered and baulked;
This was no monkey, no Maisie the Chimp
But Lady Pontonsby-Smythe out for her walk!

*

By Jane: TEA AT THE OPALACO & OTHER STORiES e books and paper back
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Also: GUYS AND GHOSTS A fun novel https://tslbooks.uk/product/guys-and-ghosts-jane-lockyer-willis/

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