Lectroil.(Kevin Hughes) Erbert looked over at the Statue in the center of the park.
It was made of Shinoleum, and few things were made of pure Shinoleum. A single ounce of Shinoleum would take as much energy as an old style Hydrogen Bomb to produce- so to see a Statue more than five feet tall, made entirely of the exotic material, well…it would have caught anyone’s eye.

Erbert wandered over to see if there were any kind of hologram, projection, or the newer Reftmist lattice that mimicked reality to the point that, for all practical purposes, was real. Nope. It was what it looked like. A statue of a small man just over five feet tall…and made entirely of the rarest substance known in the Universe.

Who the heck warranted that as a monument? And when? Shinoleum lasted forever. The Egg Heads who work with the Quantum Generators say the stuff will outlast the Universe. Don’t ask me how that is possible, but they haven’t been wrong yet. That statue could be a day old, or older than Earth itself. Who knew?

Apparently he must have said: “Who knew?” out loud. Because the Statue did. And it told him so.

Erbert nearly shat himself.

*****

“Hello. You may not know me. Let me introduce myself. I am Victor Pram. (Erbert swore it cleared its throat.) A few thousand years ago I invented a substance you now take for granted.”

With that it paused, a dramatic pause. A pregnant pause. Erbert finally got the hint.

“What substance would that be?”

Erbert saw a faint smile form on the slippery mercury like face of the statue.

“Glad you asked. Lectroil.”

Erbert laughed out loud.

“Lectroil? Nobody knows who invented that stuff. Just some old legends exist.”

This time it was the Statue of Victor Pram who laughed out loud.

“Just so my friend. Legends like me. Tell me, who would build a statue out of Shinoleum for someone who never existed?”

The look that the statue gave Erbert made him take a step back.

“So you were a real person?”

The Statue sighed.

“Yes. I told you. I am Victor Pram. I invented Lectroil in the year 2037.”

For the second time in less than fifteen minutes - Erbert almost shat himself again.

“2037? 2037! That was six thousand years ago.”

“You don’t have to tell me…I know.”

This time the Statue had a bemused expression on its face. An expression that only a being that lived a long, and I mean really long long time, could make. A face colored with the experience of eons that had washed away all emotion so that all that was left was a bleached feeling of time. It was both sad and scary.

Erbert didn’t think…he just blurted it out.

“When were you built?”

This time the laughter was a short bark.

“I wasn’t built. I was…transformed. This is not a statue. It is me. Victor Pram. I will prove it to you.”

With that the statue jumped lightly down from its pedestal, walked over to Erbert and stuck out its hand:

“Hello. Victor Pram. Nice to meet you.”

This time, Erbert shat himself.”

*****

Erbert stepped out of the fresher. He was clean again. The formulator made him a new set of clothes- and a nice pair of matching boots. He thanked it…which is all the payment necessary. For anything. Anywhere. Money hadn’t existed since…well, since the year after Lectroil was invented, discovered, or however Mr. Victor Pram found it.

Waiting for Erbert to come out of the fresher was Victor Pram in all his shinoleum glory. He was smiling.

“Sorry about that. It has been so long since someone bothered to talk to me, I forgot how people react.”

Erbert wasn’t about to correct the small but formidable statue man. Erbert had been talking to himself, not to the stature per se.

“You mean people often react like I did?

Erbert managed a Hall of Fame blush to go with his words.

“Yes. Well, sometimes. Most times they faint, or run away bravely.”

This time the smile on the smooth surface of the shinoleum was littered with humor, or recollection, or both.

“So tell me how you discovered Lectroil.”

“Well, it was a different time. For example there were eight billion people on the planet then.”

“Eight Billion!”

Erbert didn’t believe that at all. The look of the shinoleum statue, person, Victor…whatever- changed again. It got darker, threatening, downright scary. Erbert made a verbal pirouette that saved him.

“My God, that is almost beyond belief. Why there isn’t a city on Earth that has even a quarter of a million people in it now.”

The shinoleum statue lost its hue of pending violence.

“Yeah. Another one of the side effects of the change over to Lectroil.”

This time, a single tear, made completely of shinoleum, trickled down the statues face to be reabsorbed before it hit the jaw line.

“It wasn’t a pretty change over from fossil fuels, nuclear power, and “sustainable” alternatives. Six billion died in that single generation from 2037 to 2051. The One percenters and Corporate shills, and most of the High Level Governments didn’t go quietly into the night, to quote an old book.”

Erbert kept his mouth shut. He would ask Q (the computer that ruled Earth) later about whatever a book might be…and a quote too.

With a much smaller voice, Erbert did ask a different question.

“Did you…did…well, were you alive through all that?”

The statue stopped. Cold. Its face frozen in place.

Erbert waited a while. Maybe that was it. Maybe it just froze in place until some other unaware bumping like Erbert came by to start it up again. When it finally spoke again, Erbert didn’t shat himself. He merely almost jumped out of his skin.

“You might say so.”

*****

I was a young man. Naive. Idealistic. I won’t bore you with the Physics or Math involved (which got a thankful nod from Erbert). Simply put, you can’t “make” more energy. You can only get it to change form, from matter to energy, or vice versa, but it always remains the same. What I discovered was that energy was also released any time a virtual particle popped into existence in the quantum flux."

Glancing over, the statue saw the glaze forming over the eyes of his companion. He changed tact.

“Think of it this way Erbert, when water goes from liquid to solid, like ice. Or when it goes from liquid to water vapor, it changes state. Right?

“Yeah, everyone knows that.”

Well each of those phases take energy. You have to melt the ice, heat the water, and cool the vapor. Lectroil doesn’t need any energy…the energy comes from the phase shift from Virtual to Real. It is that simple.“

“Wow. I never thought of it like that. But why did it change the world. I mean the world you lived in?”

This time the statue looked stern.

“I am still alive Erbert. Just in a different form. My name is Victor Pram. I would suggest you remember that.”

Erbert had never heard certainty in a voice like that before. He gulped.

“I will… Victor.”

This time the statute positively beamed.

“Thank you. Well, to answer your question would be beyond your understanding now. I am not being condescending either. You see Erbert, back then, energy wasn’t free. Or available for everyone, or everything. It was controlled by something called: Money. Money really was just a way to tell how much it took to produce the energy necessary to make something.“

“Wait. Wait. Back up. Not everyone had enough of this money to get energy?”

“No. In fact, some people had so little of this “money” that they starved to death. Others became violent either to get, or keep, money…so they could have the things energy could produce.

When I made energy free, limitless, and available. It got ugly.”

Erbert was emboldened by the bond forming between this statue creature and himself.

“Then why did they make a statue of you?”

“They didn’t make a statue of me, Erbert. I did.”

This time it was Erbert who froze.

After a time, Erbert could think and speak again.

“You made yourself into a statue? Why?”

“Ignorance. Sheer ignorance, my friend. This is what happens to the Human Body when you bathe it in pure Lectroil.”

Erbet whistled.

“Wow. But you are immortal. I mean look at you. You haven’t aged at all.”

“Only on the inside Erbert. Only on the inside.”

Erbert reached out and patted the Shinoleum Statue named Victor Pram. It was a truly human gesture. Victor shuddered with the weight of it…it showed him how far from Humanity he was, but that he was still Human. The touch of flesh and blood was warm to his shiny shinoleum skin.

“Thank you for that. You are very kind. I am glad I decided to speak with you. I haven’t talked to another person in ages. Eons even.”

Erbert was glad the shinoleum statue felt Human, even if it was for a brief moment. The statue must have been truly lonely for a long time.

“I guess I should tell you. In fact, I must tell you. It might help with the transition. Yes, I think I shall.”

“Tell me what? What Victor? What?”

The statue turned and looked up at Erbert. Another tear was forming on the Shinoleum features of Victor Pram.

“Lectroil comes with a price.”

“What price is that?”

The tone in Victor, the shinoleum statue person, was enough to freeze the blood in his veins solid.

“This." Victor Pram waived a hand to encompass his whole body.

“I don’t understand.”

“You will. You see, Erbert, tomorrow morning everyone on Earth will transition to my form. You will never get sick. You will never die. You will never change. I have waited thousand of years for the change to happen. I was bathed in Lectroil, you folks slowly accumulated it. It will only take a second. Too fast for anyone to either stop, or understand.
I won’t be alone anymore. You will be my first friend.”

This time, Erbert shat himself... for the last time.

Victor Pram led the stunned Erbert to the nearest fresher. It was the least he could do, for tomorrow he would have a friend.

Another tear formed on the shinoleum surface, this time it went down to trickle around the smile of anticipation and joy.

Victor had paid his price. Erbert…and the others, wouldn’t have to. They had a guide.

The Fresher door opened.

Victor would have shat himself, if he could have.

Erbert was now pure Shinoleum.

It was good to laugh again.

---