Me And You(Alwin Baiju) Author’s Note

Me And You is first and foremost, A work of fiction. Characters in this story are purely fictional. Any resemblance to the real world is purely coincidental. This story is a subject of my imagination and surroundings combined. I made it up. Many of my friends helped me during writing, and I’m thankful for it. I had massive support from my family and friends, for which I’m grateful.

Enough of the formalities...

I had a great time writing it. This story connects us with the adventures and life of a short life, that is, college. A Majority of us have gone through the phase of love in college or helped your friends by being their wingman. This is a story about one such couple who goes through an on/off relationship. They both loved each other like nothing. But one silly problem was enough to end it. They each deny a chance to be with each other again after a breakup and regret it. I assure you that this story won’t be like the one where the couple gets back together in the end. I won’t tell you any more details. I hope you enjoy this story. Leave a review back at my website: https://alwination.wixsite.com/official and tell your friends about it.

-Alwin Baiju




1. Baldwin College.

A New Day. A New, Fresh Life. High school will always have a place in my heart. That’s the funny thing about this. I was an awkward guy back then. I always hated the teachers and enjoyed arguing with them. The only teacher who liked me was my English teacher. Only because of my story writing skills. Well, I hope to have a fresh start at Baldwin College. This place is incredible, as I’ve heard. But my class, not so much. They didn’t like a newcomer in their class. I hope to change that view. I bet that after one week, all will change.

One Month Later…

THE CLASS LOVES ME! I became an instant favorite in the class. They look up to me as a hero because of the Drama Incident. Until then, they never even looked at me.
They all used to be like “sup.” But after The Drama Incident, they all became like “Hey Adrian.” That was a victory for me. They called me by my name. All of them were unique strangely and funnily. But there was this one character who caught my attention. Her name was Emma. She was the most spectacular girl I ever met... easy to talk to and fun to be around. I first met her when I was assigned to her group to do some project work. She was commanding, kind, and smart. When I was assigned to her group, she didn’t care because the group had already finished their work. All that was left was charts. Nobody cared about the charts. They were meant only to demonstrate what the project was. She handed them out to me and didn’t speak a word. I worked on it, doing the best I can to impress her. She would occasionally bat out an eye to me, thinking I wouldn’t notice.
But the first time we talked and worked together was during the Drama Incident.



2. The Drama Incident.

The Drama incident was something of a legendary event in our class. We had a horrible teacher, Mrs. Tracy. She was, in all sense, the worst teacher. If you begin to list her despicable deeds, I swear, there would be a long list.
One day, precisely a week after I joined, she made our class spend lunch break doing painful yoga postures. My back hurt like hell. To make it worse, she said that it was a welcome gesture for me by the whole class. By then, half of the class hated me. It was like a competition for us to impress her. Our theatre halls were not suitable, either. During the plays, either the lights would stop working or props would go missing. At times, Mrs. Tracy would give us awful stories. She didn’t care. All she wanted were grades. She was the type of teacher who gave more importance to grades. If she had any domestic problem, she would vent out the anger on us. One day matters sprung out of control. Emma messed up her acting here and there. If she had done more, Mrs. Tracy would’ve ended her. Mrs. Tracy spoke rudely to her. I could tell by the looks on her face that she was about to cry. Her eyes watered. Her reactions were forced. She tried her best to keep it in. She was about to cry at any moment now. I couldn’t bear to see her like that. I immediately made a reason to divert Mrs. Tracy’s attention towards me. And it worked. Emma excused herself to the washroom, and I stood there, taking in all of Mrs. Tracy’s worthless yap.

*Brrrrrring*
The bell rang. There was a sense of relief. We went back to class. Emma came to class after a while. She sat down. In between the class, she called me.
“Hey,”
“Hey,”
“Thanks,”
“For what?”
“For the drama,”
“What drama?”
“The one where you messed up deliberately.”
“Hehe. Sure. Anything for a friend,”
That was the first time I felt a spark when she spoke to me. 2 weeks after that, Mrs. Tracy was suspended. The whole class came together to achieve it. It all began the day after Emma almost cried. We decided to send a letter to The Dean. I wrote the letter, the class signed it, and we sent it the next day, but there was no effect. The next day, Mrs. Tracy stormed in, her face bursting with anger. In her hand was a piece of paper.
“Who wrote this?”
We all remained silent.
“I won’t repeat this. Who wrote it? If you don’t come forward, I’ll punish the entire class.”
All of us remained still until I surrendered.
“I did it, ma’am,” I said boldly. At this time, Emma excused herself to the nurse room. The next 5 minutes were hell.
“Oh. It’s you again.” She said. She went to the desk and took a long ruler from the drawer. I couldn’t help but laugh. I don’t know why. My classmates signaled me to stop, but I couldn’t.
“You think this is funny?”
“Sorry, ma’am. I’ll stop laughing,” I said. But I couldn’t.
She hit me with all her force, right below the knee. It hurt. But I didn’t show it. Before she could beat me once more, The Dean entered. He witnessed her hitting me. And standing with him was Emma.
“What is this, Mrs. Tracy? Is this how you treat the students?”
“Sir, you don’t ---”
“Stop it. This is the 3rd time this week I’m getting a complaint about you. If it weren’t for Mrs. Emma here, I would’ve ignored it.
You are officially dismissed. We cannot tolerate this kind of behavior. Come to my office to collect the dismissal papers,”
“Yes, sir,” Mrs. Tracy spoke with a low tone.
She left the class. Emma came over to me.
“Well planned, Adrian,” She said.
“Thank you,” I said.
The class wanted to know what happened. She narrated:
“When Mrs. Tracy came in with the letter in her hand, looking all angry, Adrian threw a small piece of paper at me. It read “Convince the Dean to come to our class,”
I excused myself to the nurse room when, in fact, I was headed towards the Dean’s office. I told him about Mrs. Tracy and what she is doing. He seemed convinced. So then I followed him to our class where he caught her hitting Adrian,”
“Yo, Adrian. Are you okay?” Jake asked.
“Yeah, man. Don’t worry. Besides now we don’t have Mrs. Tracy,”

The whole class cheered.
“Great planning there, Adrian. Very swift,” Emma said.
“Thank you. Wouldn’t have worked if you weren’t there.”



3. Chat.

I got a text from an unknown number.
“Hi! Adrian. It’s Emma,”
My heart froze. How did she get my number? What would I talk with her?
“Hey,” I replied.
“What are you doing?” She asked.
“Watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S,”
“You watch it too?”
“Of course. Who doesn’t love it?”
“I know. We should watch it sometime together,”
“Sure,” I agreed.
“This is your official number right?” I asked, just to confirm.
“No. This is my sister’s number. Of course, it’s my number dumbo,”
“Ohhk… ??,”
“Okay, then. Byeeee,”
“Byeeeee,” I replied.

Conversations with our favorite people are not just conversations. It's an emotion. Sometimes silly and dramatic, sometimes emotional and deep, sometimes romantic and funny. They are a package full of memories. They make our souls smile. This chat with Emma was truly worth remembering.



4. Truth Or Dare.

Let's start with the game of Truth or Dare. Most of the teachers were absent today. It was me, Emma, Mark, Zoey, Jake, and Molly. Jake spun the pen. The nib pointed in my direction. That meant I had to do/answer. The opposite side pointed towards Zoey.
“Truth or Dare Adrian?”
“Dare”
“Here’s your first dare:
Dare 1 - Lick the blackboard from one end to another.
Dare 2 - Announce to the class that you’re gay.
Dare 3 - Propose to anyone here other than me.”

Dare 1 and 2 were tight. Dare 3 was easy. If I propose to anyone in this game, that can quickly be gone. So I proposed to Emma.
“Emma, I like you. Ever since I saw you, It was love at first sight. Will you be my girlfriend?” I said, trying to make it as cheesy as possible. But when I proposed, it felt like I was doing it for real. I was hoping for her to say yes even as a joke.
“I’ll think about it,” She said, chuckling.
Zoey spun the pen this time. The nib pointed at my direction again, and the opposite side pointed towards Jake.
“Truth or Dare?” He asked.
“Dare,” I answered.
“Hmmm. Here are the dares:
Dare 1 - Let someone from this group draw a mustache on your face.
Dare 2 - Open the window and throw your id cardholder or lanyard.
Dare 3 - Throw your pouch to anyone.”
I chose Dare 3 again. But I should’ve chosen wisely. Throwing that pouch created a huge fight. Soon, paper balls, erasers, and pencils started flying here and there. Soon, Mrs. Boris came in, hearing the boisterous class. She was a calm teacher who didn't like to punish anyone. “Children's plays,” she would say when she came across such situations. She politely asked us to remain quiet and left. We did so for 5 minutes. After that, a new phase began. There were some leftover charts in the corner. We cut ‘em and rolled them to play sword fight. It was fun, but after a while, it got boring. We continued our game. I spun the pen this time. The nib pointed towards Emma, and the opposite side pointed towards Mark.
“Truth Or Dare,” He asked.
“Truth,” she answered.
“Hmmm. Let me think.” He said.
“We don’t have the whole day, Mark. Just ask something,” said Molly.
“Okay. Fine. Emma, Confess your crush to us and we promise not to reveal it to anyone else,”
“No. I don’t have a crush,”
“There’s no point in lying, Emma. Tell us,” Mark said. She kept denying it. This went on for a long time. Finally, Mark changed the question to something else.

*Brrrrrring*
The bell rang, and Mrs. Boris had the next class. We settled down. After the class, Jake called me.
“So… Adrian, you wanna talk about your proposal?”
“During the dare?”
“Yep”
“What about it?”
“We both know it was real.”
“What? No. Never. Emma is a good friend,”
“Dude. I’m your best friend. There’s no use in lying.”
“Fine. I like her. But please don’t blabber about it to others.
“Don’t worry. Do you think about doing it for real?
“Actually, yes. I thought of proposing to her after the game. But I couldn’t. I was scared if that would ruin everything.”
“Hmmm. Okay,”



5. Hate/Love Story.

We were on our way to the theatre for a new play. I decided to ask her out on the way.
“Hey, Emma,”
“Yeah?”
“Uhh…--” I got cut off. Her friends called her for an “emergency” at the theatre. The prime actor in the play fractured his hand and couldn’t appear. So they were looking for a substitute. The story the play was based on was a terrible one. Emma suggested my name. At first, I opposed it. I had two reasons:
1 - I’m not a splendid actor. Drama is way out of my league.
2 - Emma knows I hate acting. She purposely gave my name.
But then I recalled that Emma was the lead actress. I get to play beside her. So without further objection, I signed up. I was sure Emma didn’t expect that. Let me just say, her acting sucks. Not that I’m a splendid actor, but the crowd didn’t like our show. They didn’t like her performance. I overheard some students talking about her bad acting. And I couldn’t agree more. I even joined them at one point. After the show, something came over me, and I finally gathered the courage to ask her out. Jake, my best friend, warned me, and I quote, “You are making the worst mistake a teen can make. Don’t ruin what you have with her”. I didn’t care. I took her backstage and asked her out. Outside, I was calm. But inside, I was burning with the highest form of fear. I thought she would give me the worst curses there were. But instead, she said yes! I didn’t know what to do next. I was totally unprepared. When you think of something thoroughly, there’s bound to be some faults here and there. It turns out she too had feelings for me. She covered it by ignoring me.
“Ok. Cool,” said me. I sounded like an idiot. There wasn't a better time for me to mess it up. I wanted to slap myself for saying that. I could make out from her face that she felt awkward.
“Umm, Emma. You alright? You look nervous,”
“No. It’s nothing,”
“It’s fine. You can tell me,”
“Well… I know this might be hard to believe, but it’s my first time being in a relationship,”
“What?? You’re bluffing, aren’t you???”
“Yeah, I knew you wouldn’t believe it,” replied Emma.
“I know this might be hard for you too, but um… this is my first time in a relationship too,” I said, just to be on the safe side.
“Hmmm. Not with that attitude you can,”
“Excuse me?” I retorted.
“No, no. Not in like an awful way, but you could use some change.”
“Hmmm. Ok, fine.” I responded with a smile growing out of my lips.
The next month was a blessing. Every day I woke up with the thought that Emma was my girlfriend. It gave me the boost I needed for that day. It was fun to hang out with her. Many of our friends were against it. But we didn’t care. She was funny, crafty, and cute with a hint of toughness, and she trusted me more than her friends. We did theatre together despite her horrible performance. And it sucks that I couldn’t tell her about it.
One day, things were off. Emma had a bleak look on her face. She was angry and didn’t talk to me. I asked Zoey and found out the bitter truth that she overheard me talking to Jake about her acting. I felt so guilty and went to her to speak, but she was still mad. Then I tried to justify it, which I shouldn’t have done.
“Emma. Come on. Talk to me. Are you angry with me because I said your acting sucks? It’s just your acting, nothing else,”
“Adrian, acting is something that I liked to do from a very young age. After my parents, acting was the next thing on my list. I’ve heard others say that my performance isn’t good, to my face. But when I heard it from someone I loved, it hurt me. More than the others,” said Emma, with tears pouring down her cheeks. I felt like crying too. My heart was burdened with guilt. It’s the first time a girl loved me back purely. It hurt me that I broke her feelings. I felt guilty. But I didn’t know how to patch it up. Nothing is worse other than the feeling of guilt that you are the reason your loved one is hurt. So I just left. The next day, she didn’t even look at me. I would go to her, but she would leave. This kept going on for several days. One night, I decided to end it and texted her.
8.30 PM
“Hey” I texted
No reply. “She must be chatting with someone,” I thought
9.15 PM
“Are you still angry with me?” I texted again.
Still, no reply.
9.30 PM
*Notification Bell*
The double grey ticks turned blue immediately.
“Hey, sorry. I was studying. And no, I’m not angry with you.” She texted.
“Are you okay? I’m sorry for telling you that your acting sucks.” I apologized.
“I’m sorry, too,” she replied.
“For what?”
“I was an idiot. You just expressed what you felt,” said Emma.
“When I saw your tears, I realized how much you love me.”
“Next time you have something to say about me, tell it straight to me,” said Emma.
“Ok. I promise. Good night”
“Good night.”
*Last seen today at 9.51 PM*



6. Brownies.

“Hey, Emma. Do you wanna go to the cafeteria?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Great”
Emma walked up with me to the cafeteria. You either had to bring your own food or eat theirs. The former was preferred for those who lived nearby. I took a paper bag from my bag. Inside that bag was a Chocolate Brownie. They were my favorite.
“Where did you get that?” Emma asked excitedly.
“I have my sources.”
“Hmmm”
“You like brownies?” I asked.
“Are you kidding? I love them. Who doesn’t? There’s this bakery near Baldwin. They serve the tastiest chocolate brownies I’ve ever tasted,” she said with excitement.
“I know. I got it from there. You wanna share?” I asked.
“Are you sure?” She asked.
“Yeah. Why not?”
“Okay,” She said shyly.
I took out two spoons, and as I gave one to Emma, it fell. So now, we had only one spoon. I let her have it while I went to get another spoon. There was a long queue. By the time I came back, I had thought she must’ve finished at least half of it. But she didn’t. She never touched it.
“Why didn’t you eat?”
“Just thought of waiting for you,”
I sat down and just looked at her, knowing that she was the one that I’m meant to be with. My mind was playing the love songs I’ve heard. If it were anyone else, the cake would’ve been half-eaten. She could’ve eaten while I went. But she didn’t.
“What?” She asked.
“Oh, Nothing,”



7. Breakup.

We broke up, a month ago. I’ll come straight to the point.
It started like this. One day at the playground, she came up to me and said:
“We need to talk,”
“Hey, what’s up,”
“Who is that girl?”
“Who?”
“The one you were talking to in the canteen.”
“Oh that, she is my close friend, Jenny,”
“Hmmm,”
“Why what happened?” I asked.
“Oh, Nothing. Listen, will you do something if I ask you to? Promise me,” asked Emma shyly.
“Okay. I promise. What is it?” I asked.
“Hug Me,”
“Huh??” I said, surprised.
“What? Are you a chicken? You promised. And I saw Alex and Janice doing it.” said Emma.
“Uhh... ok. Fine,” I replied with slight excitement.
I hugged her. I never hugged her before because I thought it would be awkward. But it was lovely.

Over the days, I noticed her face was gloomy again. So one day, I sat down and talked to her back.
“Hey, Emma. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing”
“No. There is something. Tell me. What is it? Is it something I did?”
“Kinda,”
“What did I do?” I asked.
“Every time I see you, you’re hanging out with your friends. You are not serious about us. The first month was great. But now you only spend time with me if I call you or if you notice me. You’re not serious about us. Like now. You came here only because my face looked sad, ”
“That’s not true. I care about you,”
“You are more of a childish character. You wanna have fun. But I’m not like that. I want to enjoy calmness. I just want you, not your childishness,”
“Are you asking me to change my character? You know I can’t do that. It’s who I am. Why should I change it just because someone told me to?”
“I just thought that it would be best for both of us,”
“NO. There’s a long history for my childishness. You wouldn’t get it,”
“What long history? It’s just a character. Nothing more. You’re talking as if your childish character was rescued from a danger… Alright. Fine. If you want to be childish, be. I don’t care. Just remember that I won’t be there with you,”
“Wait. Are you serious?”
“I never thought that it would end like this, But it has to. You were my first love, but we are opposites. There’s nothing common between us. There’s no spark,”
At first, I thought she was joking. But then realized that she wasn’t.
“What about drama, cheesecake?”
“You name three more, and I’ll be with you,”
I thought. I thought and thought. Nothing. Emma looked at me, reading my face. She knew I was blank. Finally, she said it.
“Let’s break up,” she said with resistance.
“Oh….okay. Fine,” I gave up. Without further delay, I agreed with her decision. I was willing to look needy just to keep her. But this can’t go on further.
She left, and I remained there, thinking about whether I’m to blame for my insecurities. It was awful to see her go.



8. Awkward.

Things have not been great since the breakup. Emma sits right behind me, and things have not been the same. We never talk like we used to. When our friends shipped us even after our split, I would get annoyed. And I’m sure that she felt annoyed too. They didn’t know about our breakup. Once I got so angry that I slapped Mark. It was a bit too much from my side. I said sorry, but he didn’t care. He said that he’s used to getting whacked. After a while, they came to know. My love for her was slowly fading away.
At times, I used to think about what I loved about her. But the more I thought, the more my love for her increased.
One day, she talked to me! I felt that she wanted to say sorry and be friends, but no. She wanted to brag about her recent boyfriend, Matthew. To be honest, I was somewhat jealous. But I can’t show her that because that’ll make me look like a desperate fool. So I came up with a plan. I met Matthew in the canteen. The guy was a simpleton. That made my task easy. I fed him with false info, and sure enough, the next day, Matthew broke up with Emma. But I might have taken it a little too far. Emma came toward me and yelled at me. I could have yelled back, but I chose not to.
“HOW DARE YOU? HOW DARE YOU TELL MATTHEW THAT I’M A LESBIAN?!”
“What? I didn’t tell that.” I said, chuckling.
“I never expected such behavior from you,”
I couldn’t control my giggling. Emma was still bitter at me. I didn’t like to see her like that, especially after the breakup.
So I told Matthew everything and asked him to forgive me. And he did. But there was just one condition. I had to stay away from her… forever. I denied it at first because I knew I couldn’t do it. You would not believe what he did after that. He was evil in all sense. He went to Emma and told her that the reason he broke up was Me! According to him, I forced him to do it, and if he didn’t, I would beat him up. It shocked Emma. Heck, even I was in shock. I never expected that move. Emma’s anger towards me magnified.



9. New Start.

Three months have passed since that incident. Till now, Emma hasn’t noticed me. Usually, she would at least make some stupid joke about me. But now, she’s changed. This breakup really turned her.
I now knew I would never get Emma. So I decided to move on. I now have a new girlfriend, and her name is Amanda. She’s okay. I mean, she’s not as good as Emma. Emma knows when to stop talking, whereas Amanda continues to blabber. You know when you date someone, you think about your ex(s) to make sure you don’t mess this one up. But it also crawls up in your head and gets stuck in there until you realize you are making a wrong choice.
Anyways, I tried to talk to Emma, but she resisted. I knew she wouldn’t speak to me, so I asked her best friend to convince her to leave their relationship in the past and start a new one.
That’s the one thing I like about Emma. She always prioritizes friends and family before anything. She wouldn’t deny her best friend’s request. If she does, then the problem is so severe that only God can solve it. I asked Zoey to talk to her.
“Hey Zoey, can you help me?”
“If this is about Emma, then no,”
“Come on, Zoey. Please. Tell her to give me a chance,”
“She’s still bummed out about Matthew, Adrian,”
“Listen. Do you think I would do that to Matthew? He did it upon himself because I refused not to see or talk to Emma again,”
“Why should I believe you?” Zoey asked.
“It’s your choice to believe it or not. Right now, I only care about Emma,”
“If what you’re telling is true, then why didn’t you tell about it to Emma,”
“No. Emma can never know that I still have feelings for her. You understand, right?”
“Yeah. Don’t worry. My lips are sealed,”
Zoey did it. Emma decided to give me one more chance. But it kind of felt awkward starting from a new foundation when you already know a lot about her. So we decided to talk about what we did since our breakup.
“Well, after Matthew, I’ve hit rock bottom. You know because of the--”
“Yeah. I know. And I’m sorry,” I said before letting her finish.
“What about you?” she asked, with her fingers twirling her hair.
“I’m in a relationship right now. Her name’s Amanda.”
“Oh! Wow. So, how is she?” she said with a surprised look.
“She’s okay,” I said without thinking much.
“Okay? Why?”
“Well… She’s a talker. And a bit annoying at times.”
“Hmmm.”
Then there was a long pause of silence, which was broken by Emma’s question.
“Just because we haven’t talked in months doesn’t mean that I don’t think about you or I’ve forgotten you. I’m just scared to talk and realize that it’s not the same between us anymore,”
“After all, we were friends before. Why don’t we become one again?”
“Yeah. Sure. And let’s make a pact never to be a couple again,” she said with small confidence.
“Yeah. That sounds good. Let’s just be friends,” I agreed.


Next Day

Today was the day. Emma and I became friends. I made sure that I didn’t mess up. Thankfully, fate lined my way to assure that. Amanda heard about my new friendship with Emma and didn’t like it. She complained about me “going” to spend a lot of time with her.
“Adrian, just promise me that you would spend time with me too,”
“Of course. Oh my god, why are you like Emma?”
“What? Now you’re seeing her in me?”
“No. What I meant was that she also didn’t like me hanging out with anyone else,”
“Oh. Great. That's just great. I don’t think this works out. I’m breaking up with you. Goodbye.” And she left.
My prayers were answered. Amanda left me. I think this is the least painful breakup ever for me now that I don’t have to hear stupid gossips. Now that she’s out of the picture, I have time for Emma. As I sat on a bench under the shelter of a tree, Emma approached me. She saw Amanda breaking up with me.
“Well, good that she’s gone,” she said, slowly walking towards me.
“What do you mean?”
“She’s not your type. You are more into girls who are understanding. What did you see in her? Maybe I can help,”
“Whoa. Are you setting me up? With who? And what’s the catch?”
“Do I need an excuse to help a friend?”
“No. But seriously, what’s the catch?”
“Just make me straight in front of others. It’s kinda hard being a lesbian.”
I laughed. So did she. It was good to hear that sweet laughter after three months. After a few weeks, we both found new dates. She set me up with Megan, who joined our class recently. We had many things in common. I found Shawn for her, who is a friend of mine. Interesting story. Shawn was kind of my enemy. I found out that he had a crush on Emma and would chat with her occasionally. Emma spoke about this to me. She hadn’t seen Shawn at that time. They would just chat. So I did some digging and found him in room 10-J. She asked me to stay out of this. But you know me, the messer upper. I decided to chat with Shawn. Back then, we didn’t even know each other.

7.30 PM
“Hey,” I texted
“Hey,” He texted back.
“I’m Adrian,” I introduced myself.
“I’m Shawn. Do I know you?” He asked
“Nope. But I know you. I’ll ask you one question. Answer it truthfully,”
“Sure, man. What is it?”
“Do you like Emma?”
“Who’s that?”
“Oh, shut up. I know you do.”
“WHAT!!? WTF”
*Last seen today at 7.37 PM*

That’s when I realized something. I made a big mistake. I realized he would ask Emma about who I am. I started to get messages from him. So I decided to block him. Moments later, I received the news I was expecting from Emma.

7.42 PM
“Adrian. What did you do?”
“I’m sorry. I wanted to make sure that he loved you,”
“I told you before to not interfere in this. And why do you care if he loves me or not?”

7.43 PM
“I know. I’m an idiot. I’m sorry. Promise I won’t do it again,”
“Nope. I can’t trust you again. You broke it,”

7.46 PM
“Are you there?” I texted.
“Just don’t talk to me again,”
“Why? I swear, I won’t break it again,”
“I don’t care. Just don’t talk to me again. I thought we were friends,”
“But we are,”
*Last seen today at 7.48 PM*

I watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S when I’m gloomy. There’s no more excellent feeling than watching that show. It has everything. As I was watching season 4 again, I realized something. Not to sound like an idiot, but Emma and I were like Ross and Rachel. We are on a break ;). We often have arguments. Just like Ross, I too have feelings for Emma, despite everything.

But, after a while, all was forgiven. That’s one of the qualities I like about her. She too agreed it was a stupid reason to fight over. One day, She was with Shawn. Megan was absent, and I had nothing better to do. Emma sits behind me. So to pass the time, I checked her bag and desk for some books to read. If anyone reads books more than anything, It’s Emma. I found no book. But I found her diary. I know its invasion of privacy and all, but I was curious about what she wrote. So go ahead. You have all the right to blame me. I opened the book, and it turns out, she wrote a whole story. Reading in between the lines, I understood what she was writing about. I remember every word she wrote even now, mainly because I have an eidetic memory.

10. Emma’s Diary.

1) Day: 12th March 2019

A week back, there was a new admission in my class. His name was Adrian. He seemed cool. At first, no one paid attention to him. He sat in front of me. Adrian was different. Not like in a wrong way, but in the right way. He didn’t care for what others thought. He was funny and had a good vibe. However, he is a talker. Every day, he used to find some topic to talk about. I hope we have a good relationship.

2) Day: 20th March 2019

Today, during the drama hour, Adrian planned a swift move against Mrs. Tracy, which resulted in her getting suspended. He designed it, and I executed it.

3) Day: 26th March 2019

One game of Truth Or Dare. Till then, I didn’t have him on my mind. During the game, Adrian proposed to me like a dare. The way he said it, It’s like he truly loved me. I wanted to say yes at that moment but didn’t. And I don’t know why but I regret it. After that, Mark asked me to confess my crush. I denied a lot until he changed the question, and If I continued to, I couldn’t bear it.

I stopped right there. I saw Emma by the door and kept the book back where it was. She didn’t suspect a thing.
That night, instead of watching a movie as I planned, I was writing her diary from memory. Jake kept shouting at me to turn off the lights. And I kept shouting back. For about ten minutes, Jake and I had a big fight. Eventually, I lost. For a moment, I went blank. I don’t know how I lost. So I used my phone’s flashlight. I didn’t choose to live in a hostel. I had to. Baldwin was far from where I lived. So I stayed just like others. So did Emma. Anyways, I read her diary, and I never realized her point of view until then. Most of what she wrote is a brief description of what I wrote previously. So If you want, you can skip the first few parts.

4) Day: 31st March 2019

I’ll never forget this day. It’s the day my dream came true.
Mrs. Tracy got dismissed. All thanks to me… and Adrian. It was his swift plan that helped. And for that, I’ll be really thankful.

5) Day: 2nd April 2019

Something unexpected happened today. Adrian took me out backstage and proposed to me. I said, yes. It was like he read my mind. This proposal was something I hoped to do. But I could never, not without the courage he had.

6) Day: 4th April 2019

Today was magical. It was like fate had a hand in this. Most of the teachers were on leave today. The whole day was ours. We had a blast. Adrian is much better than I expected. But I kinda ruined it in between by cracking lame jokes. I hope he didn’t mind them.
There was a long gap after that. She didn’t write anything.

7) Day: 15th May 2019

I didn’t expect this from Adrian. Out of all the people, he had to be the one. Today, as I came back from the canteen, I overheard Adrian talking to Jake. At one point, he mentioned my name. This piqued my interest. But I wish I hadn’t heard it. It broke my heart. I mean sure, my performance was shitty, but at least he could’ve told me. Instead, he decided to bitch about it to others.

I knew she cried when she wrote the last one. When I read that page, I saw a dried up mark of a water droplet. I didn’t read after that. That’s when Emma came.
The next day, I waited for her to go with Shawn. I planned to read a little bit fast to cover more. I had it all planned out. But there was one miscalculation. I forgot that I had a girlfriend. Along with Shawn, Megan also came. So I had to improvise. I suggested that we four should play a game.

“How about we play something?”
“Like what?” asked Megan.
“I don’t know. How about Hide-And-Seek?” I suggested.
“Isn’t that a bit childish?” Emma asked.
“Sounds like a good idea. Sure. Let’s play.” agreed Shawn.
“I’ll count first,” suggested Emma.
“Okay,” I agreed.

While she counted, We all hid in different places. I hid in the class, while the others were in the field. After reading a couple of parts, I stopped and resumed the game.
8) Day: 25th May 2019

I decided to forgive Adrian. He is a clumsy fellow, bound to make mistakes. But that’s not the only problem I have now. Seeing our fight in class, Jake, Adrian’s best friend, proposed to me. He thought that Adrian and I broke up. I maintained that thought and said I’ll think about it. I don’t know what came over me. I still loved Adrian. After all. He is my first love. But if Adrian finds out about this, he’ll never see Jake or me the way he does now.

Reading this section kinda made me lose faith in best friends for a while. I never thought Jake would do this. Out of all people, it had to be him. I can’t believe he waited for a chance as soon as he saw us fight. Next Day, As Jake sat beside me, I asked him about Emma casually.
“So, Jake. Listen, Emma is looking for someone to date. You know someone?”
“N-No. Why would I know,” He said, with a rapid eye movement.
“Hmmm. She said she needed someone like you”
“WHAT? ME?”
“Yep. You remind her of a secret lover she had before I came to Baldwin,”
“Huh,” He exclaimed, letting out a heavy sigh.
It was fun for a while. He would act weird around her. But then, I grew impatient and cut to the point.
“You proposed to Emma, right?”
“WHAT? What are you saying? I’m your best friend. I would never do that.” He said, stuttering here and there.
“Let me rephrase that. You proposed Emma when we had our first fight, right?” I said with a wave of small anger.
“Yeah. I did that. And I’m sorry,” he revealed, with a saddening look, unable to bear the pressure anymore.
“Why? I thought you’re my best friend. How long were you waiting to propose to her?”
“Since I met her. But ever since you came, she never even minded me. And besides, don’t worry. She still loves you. When I proposed to her that day, She said she’ll give an answer the next day. But the next day, she said that she still loved you and if she accepts anybody’s proposal, it would be yours,”
“Oh.”
I didn’t know what to say next. I apologized to Jake. But he didn’t mind that. He just asked if we could be friends like before.
I responded to that happily. Back to Emma’s Diary:

9) Day: 2nd June 2019

News Update: Adrian and I broke up. I guess I expected a lot. This was the one thing I had full faith in. All I asked was to change his character. But no. He refused. Why? Is his character God? That’s when I realized we didn’t have anything in common. How can you love someone if you don’t find a common link?

That settled it. I decided that I’m going to tell Emma why I'm childish. If you ask anybody in my class to describe me, they would Say childish or immature. But there’s a past behind that. One that I don’t enjoy. It may sound silly, and I’m not making it dramatic. The next day, I turned back to talk to Emma like I used to.

“So, What do you wanna talk about today?” I asked.
“I don’t know. You once told me that there was a past for your childishness? What is it?”
She took the words right out of my mouth. I didn’t think that she would bring it up before I did. So I denied it at first.
“Why?”
“Just tell,”
“No,”
“Come on. I won’t tell anyone. I promise,”
“Okay. Don’t laugh,”
“Sure,”
“It started back in high school. There was this girl I had a crush on. Her name was Amy. She was optimistic, beautiful, and funny. I was a nerd back then. My hairstyle was so different. One day we were all playing truth or dare. I spun. The pen’s nib pointed at me, and the other end at Amy. She asked me:
“Truth or Dare?”
“Truth,” I answered.
“Do you have a crush in this class?”
“Nope,”
“Are you sure?” she asked to confirm.
“Yeah. No one,” I denied
*brrring*
The school bell rang. There was a 15 min recess. When others asked, I had no problem in denying. But when she asked, it was a different feeling. I needed someone to talk to it about. At that time, my close friend was a guy named Andrew. At first, he seems decent, but after a while, he’s a trust-breaking idiot.”

“Oh, so like you?” Emma interrupted.
“That was one time Emma, ONE TIME,”
“Okay fine. Continue”
“Yeah. Where was I… Oh yes. I told Andrew about Amy. He told me to confess it to her. I thought so too. So that night in the orphanage, I prepared to confess--”
“Wait… Orphanage?” She asked, confused.
“That’s a different story. Anyways, I went to school the next day, but I wasn’t prepared to face what happened next. Amy’s friends gathered around me and asked if I loved Amy. My heart skipped a beat or two. How did they know? The only person I told was Andrew. And I knew he wouldn’t tell anyone, or so I thought. They said to me that Andrew was the one who told them. This infuriated me. I excused myself and went to Andrew. Without thinking further, I slapped him. It was my first time slapping someone.
“WHAT THE HELL?” He shouted.
“WHO ASKED YOU TO TELL AMY’S FRIENDS?” I shouted back.
“It just slipped out of my mouth, man. I’m sorry,”
“You can say sorry. But I’m the one who has to pay for it,”

I was at a point where what I do will only result in bad for me. But I decided to do it like a man. Parker, my good friend, called me to class one day after P.E and there I saw Amy, along with her friends, waiting for me. I didn’t know what to say then.
“What do I say?” I asked Parker.
“Say, yes.”
“What?”
“Just say yes,” He said.
“Yes,”
“Yes,” she said.
That feeling was a new one. It hit straight through me like a bullet. Word soon spread around the class, and everybody congratulated me. The next day, we started dating. But there was one problem: We didn’t know what to talk about. We just stood there saying ‘hi’ occasionally
and asking small questions like ‘What’s your favorite color?’ or ‘What’s your favorite song?’, etc. After one week, Summer Vacation started, and on the last day, She bought me a keychain as a gift. It was a bright red keychain in the shape of a heart, with the words ‘Love You’ inscribed onto it. I loved it. I didn’t get her anything, and it’s something I regretted that day. The next week, vacations started. She didn’t have a phone, so we weren’t able to keep in touch.

One Month Later…

The summer vacation was over. I learned many dating tips. Usually, the first day after vacation is supposed to be a fresh start. But for me, it was a painful one. Amy broke up with me.”

“Oh, no. I’m sorry, sweetie,” She spoke, feeling sad for me.

“It’s fine. I’ve been through worse. But this was the first time someone broke up with me. I felt truly lonely. She was the only girl I liked then. I kept hold of the keychain, thinking that she would change her mind. But she didn’t. But that’s not the worst part. I soon learned that she never even loved me. Her friends forced her to say yes. Since then, I have had trust issues. It’s ever since I came here that I decided to become childish. You know, change me. It helps me forget my old friends. Others may think its absurd, but only I know why I’m me.,”

Emma didn’t speak after that. She just felt sad for me and apologized for forcing me to change my childish behavior.

The next day, Megan was absent again. So when Emma left, I read her diary. Her latest entry was of the previous day:

10) Day: 16th November 2019

I think Adrian is lying to me about his childish behavior. Talk about drama. I wanted to laugh out so hard. During our conversation yesterday, he said he was in an orphanage. His backstory was a bit funny. I understood why he refused to change himself. It’s because he was insecure. But that’s not what’s bothering me. I’m worried if my feelings for him have resurfaced. I don’t know what to do. But I hope, whatever happens, It should not affect my friendship with Adrian.

I shouldn’t have read Emma’s diary. It was a mistake right from the beginning. I can’t tell anyone about it either. She still has feelings for me. My mind was made up the day we agreed to be friends again. But now… I don’t know. Well… Shawn broke up with Emma. And guess who he went with? Megan!! She is double-dating and thinks I’m stupid. Emma doesn’t know about it. So to speed things up, I broke up with Megan and let her be Shawn’s. We have camp next week. Emma opted out, but I persuaded her to join, mostly because I would miss her. And mostly because I want her to hear my stories during campfire. I don’t like to brag, but in high school, I was voted “Storyteller of the year” thrice.



11. Camp.

November 22nd of 2019. A rather terrifying day in my life. I wasn’t prepared for what was about to happen.
Our bus arrived an hour late, and we were standing under the scorching heat. Once the bus arrived, all of us rushed in like animals. We all wanted a taste of the A.C inside. But none of us got to experience it. Instead, all we had were A.Cs without power and Chinese paper fans. The Camp counselor brought Chinese paper fans for some activity. But we’ve found a much better use. All the girls sat in the front, whereas the boys sat on the throne, The Backseat. The counselor sits along with the driver at the front; the girls in the middle, talking gossip and playing K-pop and heaven is where all the boys do whatever they want with no restrictions. At one point, there was a bet between the boys and girls to see who can act better in charades. I opted out because I thought it was stupid.
I expected Emma to take part in this, but she opted out too. So I went over to her.
“Hey,”
“Hey,”
“May I sit here?”
“Yeah, sure,”
“So, what do you wanna talk about?”
“Anything. Just keep me distracted from the circus behind us,”
“(Chuckling) Okay. How’s Shawn,”
“Oh. We broke up,”
“Oh, no. What happened?” I asked. I knew why he broke up. But she doesn’t know that I know what happened. So I went with the flow.
“I don’t know. Maybe that’s how it is. Maybe I’m destined to be single,”
“Now come on. I was your boyfriend. I liked you. Just because we broke up doesn’t mean we hate each other,”
“But why did we break up? Because of me. My stupid demand. I’m sure Shawn broke up because of something I did,”
“Now, now. Stop thinking about him. He was useless. Friends are better than relationships. Think like that,”
“How do you remain calm and jolly even after realizing that you’ve been denied love because of something?”
“I uhh...I don’t know. Maybe I got used to it. I don’t know. I know that there is that special one for me. That’s what kept me going. But I’m afraid of not identifying her, even if she’s sitting beside me,”
“Hmmm. Anyways, chuck that. Let’s have some fun,”
“Yeah,”
She got up and joined the bet with the others. I, too, got up, but I didn’t join. I stayed there and watched her act. I must say she has improved. I listened to my music which I smuggled.
Once we reached camp, the bet was off. No one knew who won. We entered the Runestone Camping site. The air was moist with the fresh smell of the forest. We set our site somewhere in the far end of the woods. By then, nighttime rolled. We all gathered around the campfire and told stories. There was another bet between the boys and girls to see who can narrate the best story. I took part in this one because I knew very well that the boys would win with me on their side. We even changed our names. The Girls
were The Gals. The boys were The Dudes. The Dudes started first. I volunteered to tell a story.
“Some of us are afraid of being in the dark. For such people, this is not a story for you.
There was once a boy in an orphanage.
He was just like us, the same age. He had always been afraid of the dark, right from when he was sent there. No one knows why. There was a special repelling force between him and the lonely darkness. One day, his friend asked him why he was like that. He spoke up. The young boy was sleeping in his bed on a usual night. He was at the time, eight years of age. He hears footsteps outside his door and peeks out of his eyes to see what is happening. His door swings open quietly to reveal a black patch of shadow appearing out of nowhere. He ran back to his bed, covering himself with his blanket. The door slowly opened. The shadow, with its fingers, wrote something on the walls. It then hid under the child's bed. An hour passed, and his eyes are adjusting more and more to the darkness. He tries to make out the words, but it’s a struggle. He gasps when he finally makes out the sentence.
“I know you’re awake.” He feels something shift underneath his bed.
“SISTER MARIA. SISTER MARIA,” He screamed. Sister Maria rushed in on, hearing his screams.
“What Happened child? Why are you screaming?”
“There’s someone under the bed,” “Now Now child, Let me check,” She bent down and found no one. He pointed towards the wall where the shadow wrote. Sister Maria didn’t find anything. But the boy knew what he saw. To this day, the being comes out and haunts him, but with each time, the horror magnifies… The End” “Wow. Just… wow. I think we have a winner,” said one of the girls. That settled it. We won. But I didn’t know what we won. I still wasn’t clear on what we placed the bet. After a couple of stories and songs, we decided to eat. All the others were standing and eating. Emma, who skipped dinner, came over. “Hey,”
“Hey,”
“May I sit here?”
“Yeah, sure,”
“Why are you not eating?”
“I’ll eat afterward,”
“Hmmm”
“Tell me something. And be honest,” she asked
“Yeah, sure,”
“You’re an orphan, right?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Just asking. The boy in your story, it’s you, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. Don’t tell anyone. It was actually a nightmare I dreamt of. Till now, It haunts me,”
“What’s your story, Adrian? You are the one person in the whole class I’m still unclear of,”
“There’s no story. I’m just an orphan. That’s it. I’m living in a hostel because the orphanage is far away,”
“Okay, I believe you,”
“Why are you not eating?” I asked, changing the topic.
“Meh. I’ll eat afterward. Oh, and by the way, what do you think of my diary?”
“Diary? What, Diary?” I asked, with my heart pounding faster than usual.
“No need to pretend. I found out,”
“When?”
“When you hid in the class during our game of hide-and-seek,”
“You saw me?”
“No. Zoey did,”
“I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have. You have every right to blame me.”
“Oh, no. It’s fine. If someone else were to read my diary, It should be you,”
“Why?”
“I trust you now,”
“Oh...Thanks for trusting me. It means a lot,”
“Sure. Now, let’s eat,”
“I thought you don’t want anything,”
“I changed my mind. Let’s eat,”
After eating, we all went to our tents. Jake was my partner. He got up 20 minutes later saying that he had to go take a leak. But he didn’t return. I was scared of going out. Just like in my dream, I opened the tent to check where he was. I didn’t see him anywhere. I gathered my remaining bravery and got out with a torch. The light of the torch wasn’t bright enough. This scenario was just like a camp horror movie. I went over to the campfire site to see if there was anyone present. But no. If this lasted for 10-15 minutes tops, I swear I would’ve cried. But thank god it didn’t. I turned back to go back to my tent when Emma caught me by surprise.
“Hey, What are you doing here?” Asked Emma.
“I’m searching for Jake. Have you seen him?”
“Nope,”
“What are you doing here?”
“Grabbing a midnight snack. I’m hungry,”
“I thought you ate. I saw you grab two bowls of mashed potatoes,”
“Don’t judge me,”
“Okay. Now… If you don’t mind, can I come with you?” I asked shyly.
“Uhhh… Okay. Sure,” I thanked her from the bottom of my heart… in my mind. I cannot tell her that I’m a scaredy-cat. I went with her to the cafeteria. The forest was dense, and the route to the cafeteria was simple. From the campfire, you go 5-steps straight, then take 9-steps left and 12-steps right. But Emma didn’t take that way. She took 12-steps straight, 9-steps right, and 14 steps left. I asked Emma where she was going, but she didn’t respond. We finally stopped. Emma stood still. I spoke to her, but she didn’t respond. Just then, I heard the sound of a twig snapping. I turned back and what I witnessed scared the crap out of me. I saw lots of shadows slowly walking towards me, just like my dream. I almost cried when someone grabbed my hands from the back. It was Emma. I screamed in horror. A few seconds later, The shadows appeared more human. I almost fainted.
“SURPRISE!” everyone screamed. Everyone rushed in. The shadows were my friends. Jake was with them. He planned it all out. Emma was the bait. Her midnight snack was just a scam.
“WHAT’S GOING ON?” I screamed.
“Nothing, bro. It was all a prank,”
“A PRANK?” I screamed again.
“It’s kinda our tradition. Every year, it is the tradition of our class to prank the newbie(s). Someone new joins our class. And on the day of the camp, a bet is placed between the boys and girls on who can tell the best story. The person who volunteers to tell the story is the target. Emma, with her midnight snack story, guides them here, and we wait. But you bro, you screamed like a girl,”
“Hehe. But still. What the hell?”
“Chill, Adrian. You’ve just proved you’re a scaredy-cat. No need to speak more. Now… do you wanna join us to prank Megan?” Emma said, laughing.
“Oh, hell yeah,” I said. We all had a good laugh.

The next morning, early at 5 AM, we went trekking. Not so much of trekking, but a long walk. I was still sleepy. On top of that, it was chilly. We played Never Have I Ever, but instead of drinking water, we had to do two pushups. Mark was the one who was exhausted from the game. He had done many things that I estimate he did at least 26 pushups. We all had a fun time. The trekking was the last activity, and that was it. After that, we had to make breakfast with the provided ingredients. Some of us made gruesome stuff. I’m pretty sure Molly spent the rest of the trip on medications. Overall, it was great. I closed my eyes and leaned back, listening to music when Emma came over.
“Hey,”
I didn’t respond.
“Adrian,”
I still didn’t respond. She shook me. I removed my earphone and greeted her.
“Oh. Hey. Wanna listen to some music?”
“Nah. Listen, there’s something I wanna talk to you,”
“Sure. What is it? Is it a guy for you? Then I found the perfect one,”
“About that. I’ve found him,”
“Really? Who is it? Is it Emil? Or Oliver?”
“No. But I’ll give you a clue. He is a very dear friend of mine,”
I thought about it. She had many best friends. Both boys and girls.
“Jake?”
“No”
“Ben?”
“No”
“Liam?”
“No”
“Ajay?”
“No”
“Peter?”
“No”
“Adam?”
“No”
That was it. The only one who I could think of other than them was the obvious guy, me. That is if she considered me as one. I didn’t wanna ask. I was scared. But I didn’t know why. Maybe because I didn’t wanna ruin this friendship again. But I asked, anyway.
“Me?”
“Yes”
My fear came true, and I didn’t know how to reject it. I liked her… a lot. She was a good friend. And a good girlfriend. So I did something that I knew I would regret.
“Emma. I’m sorry. But right now, I’m not ready. Not that I like you, but you’re a great friend. I don’t wanna lose you as I did before. I hope you understand.”
“Oh… I understand. It’s fine. I too didn’t wanna risk our friendship. Glad I heard it from you. Still friends?”
“Of course. Wanna hear music?”
“Ah, What the heck. Sure,”
We shared the earphone and listened until we reached Baldwin. She fell asleep by then. I woke her up. We said our byes and went to the hostel. Our class was given a week’s holiday after camp.



12. Luke.

Emma hasn’t talked to me since she confided. I didn’t talk to her too, assuming that it would feel awkward. But a slight part of me wished to speak to her and patch things up.
“Hey,”
“Hey,”
“What’s up?”
“Nothing much, what about you?”
“Meh. You wanna talk about it?”
“About what?”
“About your confession,”
“Nah. I know you. You will think about it more than anything,”
“Hmmm. We agreed to not date anymore, but umm... if you wanna, I’m ready,”
“No. No need. Let’s just be friends. Promise me that you’ll never talk about this to anyone. Not even me,”
“Sure. I promise.”

It was a tough one to keep. But I managed it for one day. Zoey came up to me interrupting my reading.
“Hey, Adrian. I’ll ask you something. But you shouldn’t feel awkward about it,”
“Yeah, sure. What’s up?”
“What do you think of Luke?”
“The new kid? What about him?”
“He seems nice, doesn’t he?”
“Yeah, I guess. Why? You wanna date him?”
“No. Was asking for a friend,”
“Why did you ask me?”
“Simply,”
“Zoey. Tell me. Why did you specifically ask me?” I asked suspiciously.
“Nothing. Just asked,”
“Okay,” She took off, and I continued to read. I still had my suspicions. Why did she ask me about Luke? I had my spy bring me the info I needed. And by the spy, I meant my best friend Jake. It turns out, Zoey asked me about Luke because Emma asked her about him. So after a while, I went over to Emma and asked her.
“Hey,”
“Hey,”
“Heard you were interested in Luke,”
“Yeah. He’s a charming fellow, right?”
“Yeah. Sure,”
“You don’t have a problem with that, right?” she asked.
“No. No problem. I’ll support you no matter what,”
“Thanks. And if you don’t mind, would you talk nice about me to him or near him,”
“No. I won’t do that. Make him interested in you by yourself,”
“Come on. Please?”
“No,”
“Please,”
“Ok fine. I’ll do it,”
I went to Luke during recess. A fascinating fellow. He liked to sit alone. I didn’t know what to talk to him as I barely knew him.
“Hi,”
“Hi” Luke smiled.
“So… Why are you sitting alone?” I found the words to talk about.
“Sometimes loneliness is better than a big company”
“Wow. Philosophy,”
“No. Just a thought in my mind,”
“May I sit?” I asked.
“Sure,”
I smiled and sat beside him. We talked for a long time. He was not bad. For Emma, he was… Perfect. If there were a competition between Luke and me for Emma, he would win hands down. Both of them had many things in common. We talked about relationships. I spoke of Emma to him. He seemed interested. The more I talked about her, the more he was impressed.
“She sounds like my type,” he said, in between. That caught me off guard. I screamed… inside my head. He developed feelings for Emma.
“Hmmm. Listen, I would love to chat, but I gotta go, okay?” I said, trying to leave this conversation.
“Sure,”
I have found my competition.



13. Wingman.

Let’s not talk about me for a while. Let’s talk about Jake, my best friend. He too has a love life which he never talks about. In all his time, he has dated only one girl. But that was long back in high school. Whenever we ask him if he has a crush at least, he would deny it. But one day, the unexpected happened. On our way back to our hostel, Jake confessed that he had a crush. That was a mind-blowing piece of info. Heck, What he said was beyond mind-blowing. He said that he had a crush on Sandy. Sandy was the class techie. She was that non-dating type. The only one she dated was Peter, the class flirt. But that was because she lost a bet. She never liked him. And she never will. Their breakup was the funniest in the class. Since then, Sandy had been single. Getting her to date someone is equivalent to her losing a competition, which is impossible. But it was my responsibility as his best friend to get him what he wants if he feels it’s right. So I asked him twice to make sure he won’t turn back.
“Bro, Are you sure?”
“Yeah,”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, man. What you say or do won’t change it,”
“Okay. Fine,”
I made it my mission to get Sandy to date Jake. I won’t force her. But if she gives him a chance, she won’t regret it.

We came up with a plan on how to make it the perfect date. We came up with one masterplan which would beat any other plan out there. But there was still one problem. Jake didn’t know what to talk about to her. I told him to talk about anything they both share a common interest in. But he was too shy. We planned about it for days, but the only problem in front of us was him. Finally, we were ready. The plan was ready. We waited. I trusted him and left it all to him.
After a week, I asked him how it went. You won’t believe what he said. He was shy. HE WAS SHY. I spent more effort on this plan than anything. And he abandoned it because he was shy. I gave him a mouthful. He told me that it wasn’t time yet. I took matters into my own hands now. Without Jake’s knowledge, I went over to Sandy and told her about him. She seemed interested. But then again, she didn’t wanna date again. I asked her to give Jake a chance, and she agreed. I told her to talk to him. She said no. I then explained my backup plan to her. My backup plan was a plan made in case Jake screwed something. She agreed to talk.
“Sandy, don’t mention my name to Jake. He doesn’t know that I’m talking to you about this,”
“Fine,”

One Week Later…

Mission Accomplished. Sandy underestimated Jake. She pictured him as Peter. That’s where she was wrong. Not all are what you expect them to be. It’s nice to see them be happy.



14. Competition.

“What happened?” Zoey asked.
“Nothing,”
“Come on. Tell me”
“Nothing. Now can you please go away.”
“Okay fine. You don’t have to be rude,”
I just found out that there was going to be a drama competition among the classes. Each class was split into two groups to determine who all are going to represent the class. Luke and Emma were on the opposite team. Jake, I, and Zoey were on the other side. During this time, the class was made to sit according to the group members. Jake and I sat together, and Zoey sat behind us with Molly. Luke and Emma sat at the corner. Both groups had to come up with a play based on Shakespeare’s works. My group chose the Midsummer Night’s Dream, which I had no clue about. Emma’s group chose King Lear. Molly explained the story of Midsummer Night’s Dream. It’s great. But long, which is why I decided to be the understudy. All I have to do now is pray that the guy who plays Oberon doesn’t fall sick or get hurt.

What I hoped happened. I didn’t have to practice or take part. But not in a way I anticipated. I didn’t think that I would have to spend my time in a hospital for that.



15. Accident.

Let’s recall what happened. There was a drama competition among different classes. And to represent our class, it was divided into 2 groups. My group chose the Midsummer Night’s Dream. Emma’s group chose King Lear. I was bored and decided to help the teachers who were in charge of props for the stage. Luke must’ve seen me coming. He too volunteered to help. I was asked to climb a ladder to set up a banner reading “Welcome To Baldwin College." Luke offered to help me, but I refused. There was still bad blood between us. Only he didn’t know that. I regret it. The next thing I know, I fall off from the ladder breaking my leg. Luke was the first one to come to me. I cried in pain. The teachers carried me to the infirmary and, from there, to the hospital. The next thing I remember is waking up on a hospital bed with one leg plastered, hanging. Sister Maria stood beside me.
“Are you alright, son?” She asked with her sweet voice.
“Yeah. How long do I have to wear this?” I asked.
“I don’t know. Months maybe,”
“Shit,”
“I can’t stay here for long, Adrian. Hope you don’t mind,”
“No. It’s fine,”
“Don’t worry. I’ve asked the school to help you. They will send two friends to you. You can choose who you want to call,”
“Thanks a lot, mother,”
“Sure, dear. Take care. Bye.”
She left. The next day, I asked for Jake and Emma. They both were happy to help me. Mostly since they can bunk class, it was fun having them around while I was in that bed.
Emma cracked lame jokes. I often spilled water over myself. Jake was clumsier than usual. All in all, it was fun. At times, Jake would roam around the hospital. That leaves me with Emma. She didn’t talk that much. She kept writing in her diary.
“Why do you write it there?”
“You mean the diary?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“I don’t know. I guess to relive those happy moments in a day,”
“What if there’s no happy moment in the day?”
“I relive them too. So I can face them without hesitation next time,”
“Smart,”
“I know,”
“Does anyone else know about it?”
“No. Only you,”
“Noice. If you don’t mind, can you get me a milky way from the vending machine downstairs?”
“Sure. Are you afraid of being alone?”
“Hell Nah,”
“Okay then,”
She laughed and left for the vending machine. I found myself nothing to do other than reading Emma’s diary as it was the only book near me, or for that matter, in the whole room.

11) Day: 12th December 2019

Aiden broke his leg. He fell from a ladder while setting up props. That’s what the teachers said. But that’s not all. Another surprise awaited. Luke proposed to me. I didn’t say anything. I told him I’d answer tomorrow.

My heart sank. Luke proposed to her the day I was injured. I can’t believe it. I was starting to feel Luke isn't my rival, after all. But no. He proved it himself. Emma walked in, holding 3 Milky Way bars in her hand. She saw me reading that diary and chose to ignore it. I decided to ask her about Luke.
“So… How’s Luke?”
“He’s fine. Why do you ask?”
“Simply. It seems to me that there is a spark between both of you,”
“Oh please,” She almost blushed.
“So, what would you do if he proposed to you?” I popped the question.
“I don’t know,”
“No. You have to tell me. Yes or No,”
“I don’t know. Can we change the topic?”
“No. I need an answer right now. YES OR NO? I pressured her. My voice was slightly raised. I felt wrong in doing so, but I needed to know. Every part of my body burned when I did that. It was like something else in me took charge.
“Yes,”
“Wh-what?” Her answer caught me off-guard.
“I’d say yes,”
“Ohh… okay,” I said, lowering my voice.
“And why do you care?” She asked, raising her voice now.
“Why can’t I care?”
“Who are you to care about my love life?”
I didn’t know what to say.
“On the bus, I asked you directly if you wanna be with me again. And you said no. Do you know how much that broke me? Zoey kept telling me to wait. I’ve waited. Not anymore,” She continued.
I can’t blame her. What she says is true. It’s my fault. Jake rushed in, hearing our conversation.
“Whoa Whoa. Emma, Adrian, What happened? I could hear your conversation from the end of the hallway,”
“It’s nothing, Jake,” Emma said, walking away in anger.
“Adrian. What is it? I’ve been gone for five minutes. What happened?”
“Nothing,”
“No. When it involves both you and Emma, It’s not nothing. Tell me,”
“I found out that Luke proposed to Emma right after I was hospitalized,”
“Oh. And?” He asked.
“What do you mean?” I asked, puzzled.
“Is that why you both were shouting? Come on. Seriously?”
“You don’t get it. Luke did it right after I was away. Why didn’t he do it before?”
“Alright. Point taken. Why did Emma shout?”
“I forced her to tell if she would choose Luke over me,”
“And? What did she say?”
“She said yes. She asked why I cared about her life.”
“You can’t blame her. You were her ex. She can and will say yes to Luke. I thought you were okay with being friends,”
“I thought so too. But a few weeks back, Emma asked me if I was ready to be back with her again. And I denied,”
“WHAT? Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I didn’t want to ruin what we had already“
“You can’t blame her for that,”
I thought about that. Again, I was the one to blame at. All she did was say she’s gonna say yes. Emma came back after half an hour or so.
“Where were you?”
“Why do you care?”
“Listen… I’m sorry. I thought about it, and I’m at fault here. I’m always at fault---”
“Why did you raise your voice?” She asked, jumping right into that.
“I was upset,” I replied.
“For what?”
“I read in your diary that Luke proposed to you,”
“Is that your problem?” She asked in the most calming way.
“No. My problem is that he did it on the day my leg broke,”
“Why is that the problem?”
“I don’t know. The fact that he could’ve done it anytime, but he did it right when I wasn’t there,”
“Wait… are you considering Luke as a rival? Why? All he’s ever done to you is be kind to you,”
“I don’t know. Something about him doesn’t feel right. Nobody is that good. He must have a secret,”
“Not all people are what you want them to be,”
“Hmmm,”
“Luke is a good fellow. I don’t care if you say yes. Do it,”
“You sure. It won’t make you angry or jealous?”
“Nah,”
Our fight ended right where it started. And it finished quicker than before.

Two months later

Not much changed after two months. Other than the fact that Luke and Emma were a thing. I wasn’t a fan of it, but when Emma looked at me, my mind would change, and I would think that maybe it’s for the best. But in the deepest parts of my heart, secluded from showing its true nature, it knows I can’t accept her decision.
I tried my best. At times, I would accept their relationship and be okay with it. But later on, I forget about that. That’s the funny thing about me. I can’t forget anything, but I forget that one promise I make to myself. If you ask what my current mood is, I would say I wanna disappear from this world just once and see if someone cares about my absence or not.



16. Me And You.

Emma and I used to sit on the hostel rooftop and stare at the stars and never got tired. This was her favorite place. We used to come here when we dated. Now, only I come here to be alone and with me, a smuggled bottle of beer. This started the day I returned. I would often cry, thinking about how everyone enters my life and leaves shortly afterward. On some nights, I would remember her beautiful memories from the past, and sometimes, I'd remember the decisions that I regret making which led me here. Sometimes, Jake accompanied me. I looked at the stars and would blame The One Above All for doing this to me. I would tell him that I loved Emma and would do anything to take her back. I used to think that If we crossed paths again as lovers, I hoped to find her happy. After all, that’s why she left me.

One day as I was continuing my routine, Emma walked up from behind me. Jake called her and told her about this.
“Adrian, what is wrong with you?”
“Nothing. And why do you care?”
“Just tell,”
“Alright. You wanna know, here it is. I cared for you. I loved you from the day I arrived like nothing else… But my only problem was not showing it. When we broke up, I tried to do whatever it takes to get back again. But you resisted. And each time you kept quiet, It broke my heart. But then, you wanted to be friends and I was okay with it. But when you proposed to me on the bus, You don’t know the pain I endured to reject it---”
“Why didn’t you accept?” She asked.
“I-I was scared. I was scared that we might lose what we have of this friendship. Besides, I want to ask. What is so great about Luke? What does he have that I don’t?”
“Who’s Luke?” She replied.
“What do you mean who’s Luke?”
“Ohh. That Luke. My cous---” She said speaking like she found the answer to a forgotten question and then forgetting it again.
“Emma. What is it that you’re not telling me,” I asked doubtfully.
“I guess it’s time. I was faking it with Luke. He was my cousin from abroad who came to study here and we never dated. He was happy to help when I told him about it. Think about it. Have you seen Luke and me dating once? We would tell that but then go in our separate ways later,”
“Why? Does anyone else know about this?”
“Zoey does. And so does Jake. I did it because I know you loved me. I wanted you to accept it,”
“I do love you. And I always will. And what I said before was not because of the beer. I meant it. I rejected you on the bus because I feared that our friendship will be gone once more,”
“Promise me that you won’t leave my side even if it means risking our friendship,” said Emma.
“I promise. It’s Just Me and You,”
We hugged. I wanted to scream out in joy. My heart was at its highest form of happiness. We then sat down and she stared at the stars.
I thanked Him and apologized for blaming Him before. I tossed the bottle in my hand vowing to never drink again.



17 (i). Memories...

I woke up. My face on a pile of papers. My eyes cleared slowly as I adjusted to the beam of sunlight shooting at my face. The alarm continued to beep. I woke up slowly.
8.05 AM It showed. I got up and washed my face with cold water. I grabbed my bag and headed for my restaurant. On the way, all I could think of was what I saw. Was it a dream or a memory? I couldn’t make out the distinction. It felt so real like I’ve lived it.
I walked through the street with my bag. It was less crowded today. On my way, I called Jake to set an appointment. He was my Therapist and lived two blocks away. He often reminded me to call him if I got any “unusual dreams” or “felt-too-real-to-be-a-dream dreams.”
“Tell me the names of those characters you saw. Describe them to me how you saw.” Asked Jake.
“Uhh… it was the usual me, but younger. You were there. So were Zoey, Sandy, Luke. All of us were in our college time. There was a girl too. I kept calling her Emma. She had a sleek medium hairstyle, a sweet voice, and a beautiful smile. We were in love in that dream,”
“Emma? Oh...”
“What is it, Jake?”
“It’s Emma,”
“What do you mean? Who is Emma? And Why do I feel like I’ve known her for a long time?”
“You still don’t know?” Jake said, worried.
“No,” I replied, without having a clue of what he’s speaking about.
“Alright. Close your eyes. I never thought of doing this, but the time has come. Take deep breaths. Focus on what I speak.”
He talked about it to me. All of a sudden, it hit me like a bolt of lightning.
Four years ago…

Two years after college, I started a restaurant, and the business skyrocketed. Emma lived with me in my apartment. She was the senior product supervisor for Urban Decay. Few months after my business took off, Emma introduced me to her parents. Emma’s Mom liked me the moment she saw me. But her dad… not so much. At first, he didn’t like me because of the belief that I wouldn’t pay her much of my attention because of my business. After a week or so, he saw how much I loved her even when my restaurant went through a crisis. He saw that and treated me like his own son. After years, the warm welcome of a family greeted me and it felt great. But God shouldn’t have given me hope. He shouldn’t have given me a family and taken them away. Why? Why did it have to happen to me? But the thing that harms me the most is that what happened was my error.

Emma’s family offered to take us to a fancy restaurant to celebrate our 4th anniversary. It was lovely. Her dad was drinking and offered me one. I rejected it politely.
“No, Uncle. I don’t drink,” I said.
“Why? Is it to impress me?” He asked.
“No. No. I stopped it long ago,” I justified.
“Hmmm. Okay.” He said, letting go of that topic
Emma and her mom were laughing a lot. To this day, I cannot remember what it was they were laughing about. Dinner began with four plates of steak with mashed potatoes and fries on the side. The steak was huge and I’m pretty sure Emma didn’t finish hers. ‘Twas time for dessert. Emma ordered her favorite Chocolate Brownie. I ordered the same.
“Uncle, What do you wish?” I asked Emma’s Dad.
“I’ll have cheesecake,” I ordered one cheesecake. After dinner, Dad offered me a ride along with them. We didn’t talk much in the car. Once we reached the house, Emma’s Dad hit us with a surprise. As a gift, he gave us his car. And not just any car. A Porsche 718 Cayman 2022 model. This thing was the beast. I couldn't even afford it if I sold my restaurant.
“Boy, Let me tell you something.---” As he spoke those words, a swarm of questions filled my mind. What would he say? What did I do?
“---Emma is lucky to have you. She told me everything about your friendship right from college: your first date, your first hug, breakup, everything. I’ve never seen her this interested in someone else. You played a big role in her life. You placed her needs before yours even at times of crisis. Not everyone I know does that. And now I’m confident that she’s safe in your hands,”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Oh and also, don’t call me uncle. Call me dad. ”
Tears started to form in my eyes. I’ve never been happier. No amount of sadness can bring me down. I hugged dad for the first time, and he appreciated it. It was night. Dad gave us the keys.
“Dad accepted you. Why don’t we go for a drive to celebrate,”
“Sure,” I said with excitement.
Had I known what would happen next, I never would’ve agreed. We took it out and drove through the woods. Peaceful and fun. The wind was whistling, and leaves were falling. Emma’s face bore happiness. One that I’ve never seen before. I stared at her, admiring that smile. She noticed me looking at her.

“What?” She asked.
“Oh, Nothing,”
Moments after that, I don’t remember anything. It was all a blur. I remember the car being upside down and bad in condition —blood dripping. My head was ringing so hard like never before. I was holding on to something. It felt soft, kinda like someone’s hand. I turned to look. It was excruciating. I could barely move my neck. But I did it. I turned and saw her holding my hand. She was unconscious.
“Emma?” she didn’t respond.
“Emma?” I called again. Her eyes twitched. But she didn’t open them.
“EMMA,” I yelled with all my force. She woke up. Her eyes slowly opened.
“Adrian,” She spoke feebly.
“Everything is going to be fine. Lemme see if I can find my phone,” I assured her.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be with you,” she said, becoming more feeble.
I tried to find it by stretching my arm as far as I can. But to no avail, I couldn’t find it. Emma held on to my other hand, and I didn’t let go. But after a while, Her grasp began to loosen up.
“Emma? Wake up,” She didn’t hear. I shook her hand. She didn’t respond.
“Emma. Emma. Please wake up. I don’t wanna lose you too. Please,” I cried. She didn’t hear. I didn’t let myself believe that she was gone. I couldn’t. Even if I had the strength to move a mountain, I wouldn’t have enough to accept a world without her.
“I’m sorry,” -My last words to her before blacking out.
I don’t remember when exactly the ambulance arrived. I remember hearing the loud wailing of sirens. Also, the bright light of the day flashed in my eye. The next thing I remember is a bright light flashing again in my eye. This time, I see myself being separated from Emma as she is taken away in another gurney. She was still unconscious. Her hand looked like it was trying to reach me. It hurt me to admit that I’m the reason this happened to her.



17 (ii). The End...

“Why don’t I remember any of it, Jake?” I asked.
“I’m the reason,” He replied.
“What did you do?”
“Don’t freak out,” He tried to calm me down.
“WHAT DID YOU DO?”
“Calm Down. Listen to me. You listed me as your emergency contact. The hospital contacted me, and I arrived as fast as I could. They told me Emma didn’t make it and it broke me. When I enquired about you, they said you were on a thin line between life and death. A miracle was the only thing that could save you. You attained severe head damage. In between treatment, you once lashed out, screaming Emma’s name. During that time, your brain activity decreased, almost causing brain death. If this happened a couple more times, nothing could save you. As a therapist, your doctor advised me to hypnotize you to remove any trace of Emma from your memory as it was the only way to save you. They weren't sure to do shock therapy worrying that it might damage your brain even further. Before you got back to your apartment, I removed everything belonging to Emma. I don’t know how, but your memories are resurfacing. If you have a breakdown again, I can’t help you,”
“When did this happen?” I asked with fear.
“Two years ago,” His voice grew fainter.
“How could you?” I asked furiously.
“What do you mean?” He confusingly asked.
“How could you remove everything that reminded me of the woman I loved?”
“Be rational, Adrian. If I didn’t do this, you could’ve died,”
“I don’t care. If I died, then I died. But you shouldn’t have done that,”
It was a lot to process. I stormed off and walked back to my apartment. I got in, locked the door. Tears started to roll off my eyes, slowly making their way down the cheeks and finally plop into the floor. I wiped them, but they never stopped. Jake kept on calling me, but I rejected it. The first thing I did was search the entire place to see if there was at least a speck of dust, which helps me remember more about Emma. But I couldn’t find any. I searched day and night, but couldn’t find any. Eventually, I gave up. I sat in a corner, trying to recollect everything I can about Emma. The tears were back again. That’s when I noticed something near the coffee table. I had dropped some books there. It was glitter. I got a feeling and went up to check what it was. And I found it.
It was Emma’s Diary. I don’t remember how it looked, but I remember reading it. I opened it. Her last entry was a year ago.

12) Day: 5th February 2023

Today I’ve decided to introduce Adrian to my parents. I’m sure dad won’t like him at first. Let’s say one week. But my mom, she’ll love Him. I just hope that everything goes well.

13) Day: 13th February 2023

It worked… My Dad is liking Adrian. He invited us for dinner, which is more than enough. Now everything’s up to him. If he excels at this dinner, I don’t need to worry anymore.

I remembered her writing this. It was the previous day before the accident. She was up late. I asked her what she was up to, late at night. She just replied:
“Nothing. Just making an entry,”

She would’ve wanted me not to let Jake take the blame for what he did was right. All he did was care for me. I can’t blame him. So the next day, I called him.
“Hey, Jake,”
“Hey,”
“Listen, man. I’m sorry for yelling at you. It was just difficult for me to process everything that happened,”
“I won’t blame you. I would’ve done the same thing,”
“How’s Sandy and Evan?”
“They’re doing well. Let’s meet up somewhere. How about a bar?”
“Sure. Send me the location. I’ll be there,”
We met at the bar and recounted the old memories of Emma. It was fun talking about college over beer.
“What made you change your mind about me?” He asked.
“I was reading Emma’s diary. It had an impact on me,”
“Diary? What diary?”
“Emma wrote a diary. Only I knew about it. She liked to write about her feelings in it. You didn’t know about it. Hence you didn’t take it outta our room,”
“Good thing I didn’t,”
“What did you do with her stuff?”
“It’s safe. I kept it in a storage locker. I’ll give the keys to you later,”
“Okay,”
“Let’s go somewhere tomorrow,”
“Where?”
“It’s a surprise. But be ready,”
“Okay,”
The next day, Jake and Sandy received me from my apartment. He still kept it a surprise.
Sandy and I talked. On the way, Jake stopped by to pick up Zoey. It was like a mini Alumni in a Volkswagen 2019 Atlas. In between, we stopped for snacks. Eventually, we reached. The place caught me by surprise. It was a graveyard. We walked straight and stopped in front of a tombstone. It looked new. In it, The words -

RIP
In Loving Memory Of-
Emma Blair
Born: 5th August 1998
Died: 22nd September 2022
Loved by All, Will Live In our Hearts
Forever.

My heart sank. Jake and the others left from there. I was alone with Emma.
“Hey,” I spoke. I talked to her about where I was and what all has happened. After a while, Jake returned with a bouquet and placed it near her tombstone.
“Bye,” I spoke and left.
Jake was taking me somewhere else again. When I asked, He kept saying that it was a surprise.
We reached in front of a house. The gardens were lined with flowers.
“Go in. We’ll wait here,” Jake said.
I went and rang the bell. A familiar face opened the door. A familiar face because I’m remembering it all. Emma’s mom stood before me.
“Adrian? How are you? Where have you been?”
“Hi, mom. How are you” I replied.
“Fine, son.”
“Is dad home?”
“Yeah. Come on in,”
I entered. It was pleasantly quiet. Dad was out in the back reading a magazine under the sun.
“Adrian! How long has it been?” He asked happily.
“Hi, Dad. How have you been?”
“Fine. Where were you?”
“It’s a long story,”
“I take it that Jake told you,”
“About what?”
“The hypnotism and stuff,”
“Not exactly. I had a dream of Emma and me during our college life. That’s how I found out. Jake told me what he did, afterward. Did you know about it?”
“Yes. Jake told me he would have to do it to save your life. I’ve already lost one child. I can’t afford to lose another,”
“But I don’t understand why now?” I asked.
“It shows the love you have for her. No matter what, She can’t be erased from your life like that,” He said.
We talked a lot. Both dad and mom were happy. We said our byes and I left.
On the way back, Jake handed me Emma’s old photos. I spent the time looking at them all. The last photo I had was of the final dinner we had with dad and mom.

The End...

---