Congratulations !
You have been awarded points.
Thank you for !
- Story Listed as: Fiction For Kids
- Theme: Action & Adventure
- Subject: Adventure
- Published: 07/31/2021
Message in a bottle
Born 2010, F, from Cork, IrelandOf all the places in the world, I never thought I would be here. Let me start from the beginning. Every year on my birthday, which is the 1st of July, my dad takes me to a place I’ve never been before. We stay in this place for a week and I can choose to go anywhere I want. The only rule is, it has to be somewhere I haven’t been to yet. One of the things on my dad’s bucket list is to visit all the places in the world before he is ninety. One year, we went to the Sahara Dessert which was really, really hot. Another year, we went to Sydney, Australia. Last year, we spent the week renting a minibus and driving all around South America. But this year, I wanted to spend my 11th birthday in absolute luxury. I decided that we would go to Hawaii.
Once we had checked in to the five-star hotel by the beach that we were staying in, and I had changed into my new pink bikini I got for my birthday, I ran straight for the water with my lilo. I splashed about for a while and then, I lay down on my lilo and floated around on the water. Soon enough, I fell asleep. I was tired from the long flight because I had been too excited to take a nap. But it would prove to be one of the most misfortunate things that ever happened to me.
About five or ten minutes later, I woke up and found myself much too far away from the beach. I could just make out a little figure in the distance franticly running around on the beach, sometimes stopping at the other little stick people. They looked like insects. I realized that the tiny little figure was probably dad looking for me and I started to panic. What would he say when I got back? He would be very angry with me and that would ruin the whole holiday. But more importantly, how was I supposed to get back? I looked down. The water seemed a different colour from the water around me and it seemed to move quicker and calmer. Something was wrong but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Suddenly, it came to me. I was caught in a rip tide!
Now I was really panicking. ‘What am I going to do?!’ I thought over and over again. Then, I tried to remember what we had learned in school about rip tides. I pictured the leaflet in my head. Rule number one: don’t panic. ‘Well, that’s useful,’ I thought with sarcasm. Number two: try to swim parallel to the rip tide. Do not attempt to swim against it as it will only lead to exhaustion and panic. I did what the leaflet had said and tried to swim parallel to the current. The thing is, I’m not a great swimmer and this rip tide was very strong. In other words, I failed miserably. I was growing very desperate. Number three: shout and wave your hands in the air to attract attention or blow a whistle if you have one. I looked at the beach. The stick figures had turned into dots. My heart sank. I waved so much, I nearly took my arm off and I shouted so much, I lost my voice - but it was no use. Even if I had a whistle, nobody would have heard me from here. My heart sank even further and I did what any other person my age would do - I started to cry. I cried and I cried and I cried till my eyes were swollen purple. I managed to stop crying for a minute and look up to find that the beach wasn’t visible any more. I cried even harder. It wasn’t fair! I was here on my birthday holiday. I definitely didn’t deserve to be lost at sea on my special day.
About twenty minutes later, I found that the rip tide had led me to an island that was the size of a big trampoline. I heaved myself up on the patch of sand. My situation hadn’t improved very much but it was better to be on solid ground than to be floating on a lilo to God knows where. I took a deep breath and stopped crying. I noticed the crumpled piece of paper in front of me and a small blunt black pencil beside it. On the other side of the piece of paper, there was a large bottle with a cork. And since I had nothing better to do, I decided to write this letter.
Message in a bottle(Tara Callinan)
Of all the places in the world, I never thought I would be here. Let me start from the beginning. Every year on my birthday, which is the 1st of July, my dad takes me to a place I’ve never been before. We stay in this place for a week and I can choose to go anywhere I want. The only rule is, it has to be somewhere I haven’t been to yet. One of the things on my dad’s bucket list is to visit all the places in the world before he is ninety. One year, we went to the Sahara Dessert which was really, really hot. Another year, we went to Sydney, Australia. Last year, we spent the week renting a minibus and driving all around South America. But this year, I wanted to spend my 11th birthday in absolute luxury. I decided that we would go to Hawaii.
Once we had checked in to the five-star hotel by the beach that we were staying in, and I had changed into my new pink bikini I got for my birthday, I ran straight for the water with my lilo. I splashed about for a while and then, I lay down on my lilo and floated around on the water. Soon enough, I fell asleep. I was tired from the long flight because I had been too excited to take a nap. But it would prove to be one of the most misfortunate things that ever happened to me.
About five or ten minutes later, I woke up and found myself much too far away from the beach. I could just make out a little figure in the distance franticly running around on the beach, sometimes stopping at the other little stick people. They looked like insects. I realized that the tiny little figure was probably dad looking for me and I started to panic. What would he say when I got back? He would be very angry with me and that would ruin the whole holiday. But more importantly, how was I supposed to get back? I looked down. The water seemed a different colour from the water around me and it seemed to move quicker and calmer. Something was wrong but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Suddenly, it came to me. I was caught in a rip tide!
Now I was really panicking. ‘What am I going to do?!’ I thought over and over again. Then, I tried to remember what we had learned in school about rip tides. I pictured the leaflet in my head. Rule number one: don’t panic. ‘Well, that’s useful,’ I thought with sarcasm. Number two: try to swim parallel to the rip tide. Do not attempt to swim against it as it will only lead to exhaustion and panic. I did what the leaflet had said and tried to swim parallel to the current. The thing is, I’m not a great swimmer and this rip tide was very strong. In other words, I failed miserably. I was growing very desperate. Number three: shout and wave your hands in the air to attract attention or blow a whistle if you have one. I looked at the beach. The stick figures had turned into dots. My heart sank. I waved so much, I nearly took my arm off and I shouted so much, I lost my voice - but it was no use. Even if I had a whistle, nobody would have heard me from here. My heart sank even further and I did what any other person my age would do - I started to cry. I cried and I cried and I cried till my eyes were swollen purple. I managed to stop crying for a minute and look up to find that the beach wasn’t visible any more. I cried even harder. It wasn’t fair! I was here on my birthday holiday. I definitely didn’t deserve to be lost at sea on my special day.
About twenty minutes later, I found that the rip tide had led me to an island that was the size of a big trampoline. I heaved myself up on the patch of sand. My situation hadn’t improved very much but it was better to be on solid ground than to be floating on a lilo to God knows where. I took a deep breath and stopped crying. I noticed the crumpled piece of paper in front of me and a small blunt black pencil beside it. On the other side of the piece of paper, there was a large bottle with a cork. And since I had nothing better to do, I decided to write this letter.
- Share this story on
- 12
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Shirley Smothers
08/11/2021Scary and interesting. Kept me on edge. Hopefully she will be found. Thanks fir sharing.
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Kevin Hughes
08/11/2021Aloha Tara,
Having swum in many oceans, and living just fifteen minutes from the beach...where we lose some folks to riptides almost every summer...your story chilled me to the bone. Will she be found? Or will the note in the bottle be her legacy? The unaswered questions leave hope running wild.
But the story itself is one that many unsuspecting swimmers (and floaters) have discovered to their dismay. Wonderful scary.
Smiles, Kevin
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
JD
08/10/2021Yipes! That was a scary situation. I sure hope they find her, now that she has landed on an island. A believeable case scenario too... it seemed like it was really happening and I could imagine it. Well done. Another great short story from you, Tara! Thank you, and happy short story STAR of the day! :-)
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Martha Kang
08/02/2021I loved your story, Tara! It is a very intense situation and I have been looking a for a story like yours!
Cheers,
Martha Kang
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Radrook
07/31/2021Very interesting. I have heard about those rip tides and how they can pull a person far from shore. I felt the fear of the protangonist as the people gradually became smaller until they were barely visible. The story left me wondering what the message in the bottle was.
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Radrook
08/01/2021Well, it is still a very interesting story and written in a very engaging fashion-that's for sure. Also, please note that I did consider that the message mentioned in the story was the story itself but I wasn't sure becausse I had a hard time imagining the protagonist calmly sitting on that island writing. LOL! BTW Thanks for expanding my vocabulary. Now I know that I went camping and we slept on lilos. We just called them air mattresses. But "lilo" sounds far more exotic and dignfied and I prefer that to air mattress. Regardles, if we are swept far out to sea on one, what it is called will be the least of our worries. Sharks would be on my mind as well drowning. Very tense situation indeed. Thank God it never happened to me.
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Tara Callinan
08/01/2021Radrook, you do have a point. The letter in the bottle was the story I wrote but it is a bit unclear. If you meant the lesson learnt by the narrator, there is none. Well, unless you count ‘don’t bring a lilo to the beach’ a lesson learnt. You could say that she learnt to be more careful, but that wasn’t really what I was aiming for. The girl is simply writing down her woes. She isn’t trying to send some big message. She merely wants to be remembered by someone if she does die on the island. I don’t say this all in the story but your thought might lead to that. However, it is still unclear. Thank you for your comment. You have left me with some things to think about.
COMMENTS (7)