He Was There All Along(Kayla Teague) They say we find strength in our moments of weakness… we truly find ourselves when we’re lost. Some people can go their whole lives being lost… entertaining this idea that their life is the way it’s supposed to be and they see no need in changing it. Then there are others who need the constant change because they can’t handle stability. But tell me who wants to look over their shoulder and see no one walking along with them? Life is lonely, and that is something that is undeniable. Life is hard and nothing will ever make it easy. Faith can be broken but it can also be restored. All the bad things can be worth it if you find someone to always walk along this path with you, through the bumps and turns, through the good and the bad.

Take me for example… no I don’t have experiences that are so terrible that I can’t recover from, and my problems are not and will never be as bad as some this world offers, but like every one I’ve had my fair share of hard times. When I hit rock bottom there was no one to find standing beside me, I just fell… and I fell hard. No matter the weight of the pain, it’s doubled or even tripled when you have no one there to catch you. I had no one, or so I thought… I didn’t see everyone who was just waiting for the invitation to walk along with me (bare my corniness). I didn’t see my family who would go to war for me without a second thought, and I didn’t see a God who was there all along and just needed me to tell him I needed him. I cried myself to sleep for months begging for the answers and wondering why the sky was falling down on me?

I won’t go into details about what happened, only those closest to me know and understand, but no one understands like God does. You see, I’m a huge believer in God, not because I was told he was good and almighty, not because I went to church every Sunday and I had someone telling me my faith, not because I read the Bible nightly, but because when I fell he reached down and picked me back up. When I cried every night begging for the answers, he sat there with me and let me cry, because he knew my heart was breaking - but at the same time it was opening all over again…when I needed a miracle he gave it to me without me ever asking or probably even deserving it. He saved me when I couldn’t save myself. When I talked I just knew he was listening… it's honestly unexplainable, and actually I wouldn’t want to try to explain it, because that’s kind of our special bond… I talk, he listens to all my crazy thoughts. Ha-ha. So, one day I woke up went to school and it wasn’t so hard anymore. I could finally look over my shoulder and there he was. I was a runaway who was brought back home again.

I know, like so many people, you see me how you want to, and that’s okay. Because I can’t sit around spending my whole life trying to make you see the “real” me, because you have your opinion and you’re completely entitled to it. Yet, I’m not what you think, and I’m not who you see me as. If you’ve ever thought about me in a certain way, or had these made up fantasies about who I am, what I’m made of, who my friends are, or who I love, then you’d be wrong. What makes us who we are can never be determined by one conversation or someone’s opinion of us. We spend our whole lives deciding who other people are and miss out finding who we are. We miss out on what we have… family, friends, and love. Everything that makes you who you are is right in front of your eyes you’ve just got to take a look around.

Someone great once told me, “Actions speak louder than words”, and that’s more true than anything I’ve ever been taught. See, you can be called a snob or a dork, but words mean nothing because you show who you are by your actions. I was told I was nothing and no one cared about me, and I was hurt, broken, but I was not lost. Against what I was told I was, I took action and I got out of bed, wiped away the tears, and moved on with my life. People don’t have the power to break you, only you have that power to give away.

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