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- Story Listed as: True Life For Teens
- Theme: Mystery
- Subject: Revenge / Poetic Justice / Karma
- Published: 03/28/2022
“You are so unappreciated, why can’t you tell that I am trying to help?”
“NO, I am not, YOU just don’t let people be who they ARE!” I screamed back to mother as I slammed the door and went into my room.
My name is Carlos, I am 18 years old, and my mother hates me, she hates everyone. She is always trying to change who they are just because they are not “perfect”, she criticizes everyone outside the family. The only person inside the family she criticizes is me, I am the middle child in a family of 7. In my family, there is my mom who criticizes me, my dad who is a bystander and goes with what my mom says. My sister who is always stuck doing homework for doctor school in her room, my older brother who is a spoiled brat who my mom adores. Then there is me, I am hated by everyone in the family because I don’t want to be a dentist or a doctor, which is unfair. Right after me there are my younger brothers, the twins, they are spoiled but are no brats they actually support me. I woke up early that day, I was packing for college I could see everyone ready for a party, they would probably do it, I know they won’t miss me.
I went back home 4 years later, I know I should be happy to see my family, but I was not. I was so excited to be in college and wanted to go back, but I wanted to get a job, so I came back. When I got home everyone just started criticizing me, mostly mom, she said things like
“Why can't you just be a doctor!”
“You are just not successful in life.”
“You know you are a loser, right?”
I know that she will keep going on and on about me, but I have learned to ignore her. Later that night we had a fancy dinner celebrating the twins graduating from high school, we had a lot of food and then the chaos started. My big brother started being the brat he is.
“Mom, I hate this food,” He yelled
“You know that I wanted mac n cheese!” He continued
“This is a celebration for your siblings,” she yelled back, “now stop ruining it”
“But I told you I wanted mac n cheese.”
“And you will have it tomorrow now shut up!”
She looked so angry that he stopped and left, everyone went back to talking, but I could still feel the tension between me and her, and him and her. I was getting sleepy, so I said I was going to leave immediately my mom exploded again,
“See,” she said, “He is such a bad son he is leaving right in the middle of dinner”
“I am sleepy!” I responded, “I want to go to bed.”
“I don’t care,” she interrupted, “you are a bad son and a bad brother to the twins!”
Then all of a sudden I exploded too.
“I am not a bad son!” I yelled at her “you have a problem with me and I don’t care, but I am
not a bad son nor a bad brother, and I don’t care anymore!”
I ran upstairs and started kicking things, I was so mad. A few minutes later, I heard everyone going upstairs, so I went to the neighbor's house, he was like my best friend. His house was so colorful and joy full, ll he understood me 100%, and I loved hanging out with him. We want to play cards, so we started and finished almost at 12:00 am. I was walking back from my neighbors, and he was with me, we were talking about my mother he told me he hated her and was mad at her because he heard what she told me, but we obviously couldn’t do
anything. After about 5 minutes, we could hear my mo cry, and we were all in her room,
watching her, then we noticed she was dead. My dad called the police and the next morning
they started investigating. After a week the police and investigators found nothing, so they
decided they were going to do a trail to really see if they could find something so that day
every one of us went to court. At court, the judge started talking first.
“What happened that night?” she asked my dad
“Well the twins had just graduated from high school, so we had dinner.” he answered back
“Did something happen in that dinner?”
“Yes,” He said, “we had a couple of fights first about the food my older son did not like it, so he complained, and then my wife started criticizing my other son, so they fought too.”
“Anything else?”
“Well after the dinner she and I had a discussion, I told her it was not okay for her to criticism our son like that, and she apologized to me for that.”
“Okay, now everyone is going to tell me what they were doing 10 minutes before that, you first” said the judge as she pointed to my sister
“I was doing homework in my room, mom and I had no problems before that.” she answered
“You next” repeated the judge, and she pointed at my older brother.
“I had a fight with my mom because she did not make my favorite food, but he went to play
the guitar in his room.” he answered
“You are next” She said pointing at me
“My mom and I had a fight,” I answered, “then I went to my neighbor house, but I was entering the house.”
“You two are next” she said
“We were playing cards!” exclaimed, the twins ate the same time.
“Okay, I will discuss it and in 5 minutes we will tell you our answer” she told us.
After a while the judge came back and talked to me, my older brother and my dad. She asked us some questions. We were asked if we had killed our mom, and we all said no, they decided we were right because most people feel guilty and come out and say it. Three days later we were told that the case was closed and that mom had died because of something else.
But there could be a murderer in the family, even worse in the house.
The Killer(Mariana)
“You are so unappreciated, why can’t you tell that I am trying to help?”
“NO, I am not, YOU just don’t let people be who they ARE!” I screamed back to mother as I slammed the door and went into my room.
My name is Carlos, I am 18 years old, and my mother hates me, she hates everyone. She is always trying to change who they are just because they are not “perfect”, she criticizes everyone outside the family. The only person inside the family she criticizes is me, I am the middle child in a family of 7. In my family, there is my mom who criticizes me, my dad who is a bystander and goes with what my mom says. My sister who is always stuck doing homework for doctor school in her room, my older brother who is a spoiled brat who my mom adores. Then there is me, I am hated by everyone in the family because I don’t want to be a dentist or a doctor, which is unfair. Right after me there are my younger brothers, the twins, they are spoiled but are no brats they actually support me. I woke up early that day, I was packing for college I could see everyone ready for a party, they would probably do it, I know they won’t miss me.
I went back home 4 years later, I know I should be happy to see my family, but I was not. I was so excited to be in college and wanted to go back, but I wanted to get a job, so I came back. When I got home everyone just started criticizing me, mostly mom, she said things like
“Why can't you just be a doctor!”
“You are just not successful in life.”
“You know you are a loser, right?”
I know that she will keep going on and on about me, but I have learned to ignore her. Later that night we had a fancy dinner celebrating the twins graduating from high school, we had a lot of food and then the chaos started. My big brother started being the brat he is.
“Mom, I hate this food,” He yelled
“You know that I wanted mac n cheese!” He continued
“This is a celebration for your siblings,” she yelled back, “now stop ruining it”
“But I told you I wanted mac n cheese.”
“And you will have it tomorrow now shut up!”
She looked so angry that he stopped and left, everyone went back to talking, but I could still feel the tension between me and her, and him and her. I was getting sleepy, so I said I was going to leave immediately my mom exploded again,
“See,” she said, “He is such a bad son he is leaving right in the middle of dinner”
“I am sleepy!” I responded, “I want to go to bed.”
“I don’t care,” she interrupted, “you are a bad son and a bad brother to the twins!”
Then all of a sudden I exploded too.
“I am not a bad son!” I yelled at her “you have a problem with me and I don’t care, but I am
not a bad son nor a bad brother, and I don’t care anymore!”
I ran upstairs and started kicking things, I was so mad. A few minutes later, I heard everyone going upstairs, so I went to the neighbor's house, he was like my best friend. His house was so colorful and joy full, ll he understood me 100%, and I loved hanging out with him. We want to play cards, so we started and finished almost at 12:00 am. I was walking back from my neighbors, and he was with me, we were talking about my mother he told me he hated her and was mad at her because he heard what she told me, but we obviously couldn’t do
anything. After about 5 minutes, we could hear my mo cry, and we were all in her room,
watching her, then we noticed she was dead. My dad called the police and the next morning
they started investigating. After a week the police and investigators found nothing, so they
decided they were going to do a trail to really see if they could find something so that day
every one of us went to court. At court, the judge started talking first.
“What happened that night?” she asked my dad
“Well the twins had just graduated from high school, so we had dinner.” he answered back
“Did something happen in that dinner?”
“Yes,” He said, “we had a couple of fights first about the food my older son did not like it, so he complained, and then my wife started criticizing my other son, so they fought too.”
“Anything else?”
“Well after the dinner she and I had a discussion, I told her it was not okay for her to criticism our son like that, and she apologized to me for that.”
“Okay, now everyone is going to tell me what they were doing 10 minutes before that, you first” said the judge as she pointed to my sister
“I was doing homework in my room, mom and I had no problems before that.” she answered
“You next” repeated the judge, and she pointed at my older brother.
“I had a fight with my mom because she did not make my favorite food, but he went to play
the guitar in his room.” he answered
“You are next” She said pointing at me
“My mom and I had a fight,” I answered, “then I went to my neighbor house, but I was entering the house.”
“You two are next” she said
“We were playing cards!” exclaimed, the twins ate the same time.
“Okay, I will discuss it and in 5 minutes we will tell you our answer” she told us.
After a while the judge came back and talked to me, my older brother and my dad. She asked us some questions. We were asked if we had killed our mom, and we all said no, they decided we were right because most people feel guilty and come out and say it. Three days later we were told that the case was closed and that mom had died because of something else.
But there could be a murderer in the family, even worse in the house.
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Paola Probert
03/30/2022Wow! I personally think that Carlos is the murderer. I think your story is very creative and love that it ends on a cliffhanger. I love that you based the story somewhat on your own life! Your big family, being a middle child, having your own hobbies and likes, and you put it all together to make a really nice story! I do wonder who was the killer, Carlos? The sister? the twins? Suicide?
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Mariana
03/30/2022don't give pi
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Shelly Garrod
03/29/2022Quite an interesting story Mariana. I wonder who the killer could be! Nice job.
Shelly
COMMENTS (2)