Replacing the President(Martin Green) 2023PrezReplaced (Approx. 500 wds.)


Replacing the President

“You can’t just replace me,” sputtered the President.

“Yes, I can,” said Truman the robot, who’d been the President’s aide. “Article 25 of the Constitution says the President can be replaced for incompetence.”

“Who says I’m incompetent?”

“The Vice President and your Cabinet and the House and the Senate unanimously agree. I might also add that according to the latest surveys the great majority of the American people also agree.”

“So, I suppose the Vice President will become President.”

“No, the Vice President is just as incompetent as you are, even more so if that is possible. It would not be logical to replace one incompetent fool with another one.”

“So, who will it be?”

“I will be your replacement.”

“But, but, you’re a robot.”

“Exactly. I’ve been programmed to think logically and so I’m not bound by the extreme ideologies that have taken hold or the personal interests, such as acquiring wealth and power, that drive almost all politicians. I’m also programmed to tell the truth and so won’t be constantly lying to the American people as has been your habit. For example, you said that if you were elected you would unify the country. Instead, you have demonized the other party and further divided the country. That was a lie.”

“But, but I’m a politician. We have to lie. That’s what politicians do.”

“Yes, and that is just one of the reasons that you must go.”

“Wait a minute, the next election is coming up. What about that? And what about that other party’s guy? He’s as big a fool and liar as I am.”

“That is true, and that is why the election has been postponed indefinitely.”

“But can you do that?”

“It’s already been arranged. You have been living inside your own little bubble for so long that you have no idea of what’s going on. The American people are tired of extreme ideologies and of division. I will do my best to unify the country and that is not a lie.”

“But what about, well, climate change, what are you going to do about that?”

“I will approach that issue in logical fashion and decide how best to curtail harmful emissions without destroying the current energy structure with unreasonable demands. My intent will be to make America energy independent.”

“And China, and Russia, and Iran, and North Korea. What will you do about them?”

“My intent there will be to make this country strong, so strong that no other country will be tempted to attack us or our allies.”

“Huh! You have a lot of good intentions, all right. But what if I refuse to leave my office. I can always call my Secret Service agents to protect me.”

“You forget that all of your Secret Service agents are robots, just like me. In fact, I will call them now myself.”

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After the President had been removed kicking and screaming, the robot Truman sat behind the presidential desk and mused, “This is going to be a difficult task. The country is in such a mess and there’s so much to do. I hope I’m up to it.”

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“My approach will be to make America...

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