Pain Is In The Brain!(Cam Rascoe) “Let’s go! You’ve got to push yourself boy! Never show weakness! Pain is in the brain!”

Football coach Ralph Morgan screamed into the teary eyed face of the sophomore walk-on. Ralph was determined to break him. He resented having to waste his time coaching and drilling local boys who had dreams of playing football after high school. He was used to having scholarship players that he needed to focus on. Coach Morgan didn’t appreciate being forced to do things. Since being released from a second division one NCAA University in the past five years this is where he landed. In the mountains of Southwestern Virginia, he found himself coaching at a first year NAIA program. Once a defensive coordinator in back-to-back major bowl games, Ralph despised having to answer to lesser coaches and as a position coach at this tiny college. His coaching style he refused to change no matter how much they tried to punish him. Now he was extra abusive due to his frustrations over his failures.

Not all of the players were locals or kids drafted from Florida or the east coast of Virginia. The year was 1991 and some ex-military and older transfer players from larger universities made their presence known during the inaugural training camp. Ralph cut no one any slack. He didn’t care about where any of them came from or what they had been through. He was the boss and they had all better fall in line.

“C’mon on GI Joe pick those damn feet up boy. This ain’t no weak ass boot camp full of sissies. Only real men make it out here boy. Now pick those damn feet up!”

Morgan’s tough guy act was wearing thin on a lot of the older players. He had most of the freshman and sophomores shook but the other guys could recognize fake toughness when they saw it. They could tell that Coach Morgan just got a kick out of throwing his weight around. He wasn’t trying to mold or shape them into better players or men. The portly man was just getting off on the ill-treatment he subjected them to.

Some of the players had been through real boot camp and even saw combat. Morgan was a joke to them. They shared their feelings with one another.

“You know that little fat coach thinks he’s a tough guy.”
“Yeah he tries to ride you harder than anyone else because he’s weak.”
“I’ve seen ten times tougher in basic training. That guy’s a joke.”

At the same table quietly eating his lunch was Larry Kilgore. Larry was fresh out of the Marines after doing two tours. He didn’t say much but he observed all. He, like the other three men at the table didn’t care for weak abusive men. Larry’s ill feelings towards the coach went even deeper. He could become violent at any moment. His post traumatic stress syndrome caused him to become fearful and then angry often. Larry wasn’t the greatest football player but he was in great shape and could fight like nobody’s business.

As training camp came to a close, the coaches announced who had made the team. Surprisingly enough, Larry made the team. The coaches liked his hustle and the fact that he followed every order without question. He would be used primarily as a practice dummy or maybe sometimes a special team player. Larry was on the team to serve at the coaches pleasure. One coach in particular would make sure to full advantage.

“Hey tackling dummy, get over here and hold up this pad.”

Larry Kilgore sprinted over and did like he was told, all the while the fire in his belly was smoldering. Linebacker after linebacker plowed into him but Larry stood strong, holding the pad, taking each blow. His reward for a job well done was another insult from his trainer of torment. His ex-military teammates understood him following orders but never could bring themselves to accept the abuse he was taking. They felt like Larry was one of theirs so they decided to go by his dorm room and talk to him about it.

“Larry, why you take so much shit off of that Morgan guy? His little act is getting old with us.”

Larry scrubbed away at his boot; without looking up he answered them shortly.

“I’m just following orders.”

“You ain’t taking orders son, you’re taking abuse. That ain’t football. That’s just some fat little man getting his rocks off on treating you like shit. We don’t like it man. You need to stand up to him before somebody does something to him.”

Larry looked up at his teammates briefly.

“I don’t care for the man but I have to respect his position and authority. When he crosses the line, I’ll deal with it.”

His answer was satisfactory to the group so they nodded and bid him a due. Larry continued to clean his boots. That night he was early to bed, the next morning early to rise and early to class. He was determined to get his degree. It was a promise he made to his now dead mama. She had a heart attack while he was away at war. He didn’t learn of her demise until five months after her death. Being a from a small dysfunctional family there weren’t many points of contact and his mother was buried in the small town of Wise by members of her congregation. Larry returned to an empty house with his only sibling drugged up living couch to couch two towns over. He enrolled in college and joined the football team. He knew that would make his dear mama happy. Larry loved his mama, she was all he had, since she passed on a big void was left in his life.

As the season dragged on, the team’s morale dissipated. They were losing more games than they were winning and the temperature was steadily dropping. Every game it got tougher and tougher to play in those frigid mountains. Larry never let the cold or losing bring him down. He still ran every sprint and every drill full speed and with everything he had.

Unfortunately for him sometimes it still just wasn’t good enough for Coach Morgan. He just had that need to be nasty. Verbal, physical, emotional and psychological abuse had cost him his jobs but he still would never stop… unless he was forced to. Morgan didn’t know what kind of monster he was dealing with in Larry. Finally one day he said the magic words.

“What are you stupid or something Tackling Dummy. Get your ass down and drive with your legs. Do it like your mama taught cha boy!”

Just then Larry snapped. He charged Ralph Morgan and hit him so hard that they landed five feet behind where he was standing. Larry landed on top of him knocking the wind from his body leaving him gasping for air. The hit wasn’t enough, Larry had snapped. He just started banging the coaches head against the ground, repeating the same phrase over and over again.

“Pain is in the brain! Pain is in the brain!”

Eventually some of the other players dragged him off of the chubby little man but the damage had already been done. Ralph had a ton of pain and it was all in his brain. He now suffered from shaken baby syndrome; Larry rattled his brain. That was Coach’s last day ever to coach or drive or hold a job. He was now mentally handicapped. Larry was diagnosed with PTSD and received treatment rather than punishment. He avoided a lengthy jail sentence due to all of the character witnesses, slick lawyer talk and expert witnesses. Ralph Morgan was preaching the truth all along. Pain is… truly in the brain.

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