"Do you have a tie?"(Kevin Hughes) Author's Note:

This is an email I sent out to friends- and is an actual conversation I had at the grocery store. The thumbnail is from my sister's Wedding back in 1972...and everyone had a tie, or bow tie. No clip-on of either kind. Oh the memories!
*****
Aloha All,

I was talking to a Veteran the other day. He told me that his friend called him and said:

“Hey, do you have a tie I can borrow?”

Turns out his friend is in his seventies, and got asked out by one of the Ladies he plays bridge with…to a dance at the Senior Center. His first date in a real long time. So he wanted to look sharp. When he looked in his closet…sport coats, no suits, and no ties!

The guy telling me the story he didn’t have any ties to give his friend. I looked when I got home…and I don’t have any ties either! I don’t think I could tie a tie anymore. In the Army I had to tie one on (joke intended) every time I put on my Class A dress uniform.

And back in my day, ties were required for Interviews, work, and even in most restaurants. So I could tie a tie. Even the fancy Full Windsor knot was within my capabilities. My Uncle Bill tried (and failed) to teach me how to tie a bow tie. Alas, it was clip on bow ties for me, or the more Formal Tux Tie with the strap that went around your neck.

But I could make a decent knot at one time. And get the tail length correct too. But not anymore. I don’t even have a tie to practice with!

So at FoodLion I asked folks if they had a tie, or knew how to make any of the knots for a tie. Nope. Nobody under forty basically knew about ties. Even the Managers…who had to wear a tie, wore the tie either incorrectly, loosely, or with a knot that would have never passed inspection. LOL

One young kid told me he had a tie…but it zipped up! So the front looked like a tie, but all you did was slide the ring of material over your head, then zip up the front. Ta Da. I haven’t seen one of those, but sure would love to.

One of the Ladies that worked there told me her Father had to wear a suit to Work for forty years. So when he retired he gave away ever suit and tie to Catholic Charities. Only to, just a few years later, become active in his Church teaching young couples how to walk down the aisle for Weddings.

And since he also attended the Weddings…he had to go an buy a Suit and Tie again. That made me laugh. Another woman told me she kept her Dad’s favorite tie after he passed on. And everyone of her four male children had to wear it when they graduated from HS. And so far, two of them have worn it for their Graduation from College. I told her that was a wonderful tradition and legacy.

She made me laugh when she said: “My kids don’t know how to tie a tie. So I put it on them and tie the knot. Just like dancing, all of us women have to learn how to do what men do…backwards.”

That made me roll. I never thought of it that way before.

Maybe I will go to GoodWill with Kathy next time she goes, and pick up a tie to practice with. LOL But I forgot which tie qualifies as a “Power Tie”; or which ones go with Weddings and Business situations.

Is there an “informal” tie? I remember one time going to a restaurant that required ties and a jacket on men. They had a bunch of ties behind the Cloak room door, and even an extra jacket or two. Those days are gone.

I don’t remember (besides on the Ships) being denied entrance to anything or any restaurant... because I didn’t have a tie. Maybe I just don’t eat at classy enough places?

So there you go, a wonderful set of memories, lost skills, and proof that Society keeps moving on even if you don’t. I guess my spit shined shoes aren’t really necessary anymore either. Sigh. Two skills the Army thought highly of…crisp solid knots, and shiny shoes!

And the kicker for the end of the story:

The guy told me when he called his friend back to say he couldn’t find a tie. The guy told him:

“That’s okay. I called her and apologized but I wouldn’t be wearing a tie for our date. She laughed and told me: “That’s okay, Harold. I couldn’t find my gloves and pearls either.”

So are gloves and pearls the female equivalent of “ties”? If so, any of you girls still wear gloves and pearls on a first date?

It’s the little things that make conversations fun.

Smiles, Kevin

---