Word of the year: demure.(Kevin Hughes) Authors NOTE: When I went to look up pictures of a "demure woman", I was surprised to find not a single example of what that word meant to me. Just millions of poses that mimicked the Meme intention, where the young woman were anything but demure. Wicked cool, eh?

Words. I use them a lot. Those of you who get my emails already know that. People who just meet me at the grocery store - well, they realize that fairly quickly too. My daughter’s tell me that my texts read like emails. My emails read like long letters, and my letters read like books. Everyone uses words, my Dad used maybe 1,500 of them in his entire life.

For in my Dad’s generation, your words were few. You kept silent and let your work and behavior speak for you. If my Dad said: “Good Job.” You had to have done something marvelous. They took Vows back in my Dad’s Day, and made Promises too. God forbid you should break either of them. My generation used words my Dad never would have. We thought they were just words. My Dad’s generation knew better. Words aren’t just words. Not sure what the word for that is. LOL

I once had a gaggle of Comedian’s over the house for a home cooked meal. Believe me, home cooked meals when I was a Road Comic, (and when I was a Soldier) were real treats. One of the Comics used the “F” word like it was a form of verbal M&M’s. Handfuls of the “F” word were sprinkled throughout his conversation.

When I pointed out that my children were also seated at the table, and I would prefer he not use that word. He said:

“Why? It’s just a word. Watch!”

And with that he said the “F” word like ten times in a row while making a fanning motion in front of his mouth, to show the words were just puffs of air that disappeared as soon as they left his mouth.

It was hilarious, and my kids laughed. It lead to a real conversation about what words mean. It brought up the idea of boundaries, etiquette, and honoring the rules of the house. To his credit, he never said the “F” word again that evening - or on any of the other times he was invited to our house for dinner. So it turned out to be a “Teaching Moment” and a learning moment too. In his house, that word was used so much that it lost most of its impact. His family used it as a noun, adjective, verb, and even as a place holder where most folks might just say: “huh?”

Every generation has its words. My older brothers and sisters used the Beatnik talk that linked Jazz with the introduction of Rock and Roll - two words with separate meanings, when taken together mean a whole genre of Music, and I bet you never had a problem figuring out what “Rock and Roll” meant, or is. And that music was Righteous.

My generation followed along with: “tune in, drop out”, Far out, Peace, Groovy, as “Acid Rock” morphed into “Heavy Metal” then Grunge and Punk Rock. Rap music came as a Fad and stayed as a Mainstream Music Genre that is now the umbrella for several forms of Rap.

But the words I want to talk about aren’t related to Music, but to how they change meanings over time. Or are used in a way I did not learn.

Take: Sick, Dope, and Brat. I grew up learning that “sick” meant you were ill. “I can’t come to school today. I’m sick.”

A “Dope” was a person doing something stupid. A dope was leaning closer to the word jerk, but contained “stupidity” at all times. If you hurt your girlfriend’s feelings, your buddies would say: “You are such a dope. Why did you say that?”

A “brat”. “You little brat!” Meant bad, mischievous, or selfish behavior. It was clear to us what you meant if you said: “My little brother is a brat.”

Now sick is a good word. It means you did something spectacular, or notable. Dope has filled in that same slot. “I heard this new song, and it is Dope.” Meaning it is “fire.” Another word that has morphed from its original.

And brat means to act out with confidence. Wow. Words change.

And this year, 2024, the word of the year is: Demure. Yes, demure. But not the way I use it. It has morphed into a statement of sarcasm. An influencer named: Jools Lebron- with like two and a half million followers on her Social Media account- uses it sarcastically…and it caught on. She uses the phrase :

“Very demure, very mindful.”

Now those two short phrases are used by all kinds of celebrities, influencers, and even in ordinary conversations. It means the very opposite of the words themselves.

For example, in her postings she would say:

“I am going out tonight in Vegas. Very demure. Very mindful.”

And then she would show snapshots of her evening... where she was being anything but demure and mindful. Giggling while drinking and dancing wildly, drunkenly looking for her hotel room, and in general ignoring the actual meanings of the words, demure and mindful.

Words that create an entire set of meaning, feelings, and situations - beyond just a definition. I think that is far out, and right on.

Peace all.

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