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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Teens
- Theme: Family & Friends
- Subject: Pets / Animal Friends
- Published: 12/05/2024
More than just a loyal friend
Teen, F, from HCMC, Viet NamLesley sat on her wheelchair and stared out from the framed window that overlooks the view of the plain, snowy hills with huge, shadowing skeletal trees reaching out to the bleak December sky and the snowy owls hooting loudly atop the branches. Lesley and her family just moved in and are now spending their first winter over at their new house. As the snow fell rapidly outside the window, a loud knock erupted from the door followed by a loud bark.
Mom ran over to the door and opened it, wearing her knitted sweater with floral patterns decorating the sweater. Standing there on the doorsteps was a little lady with grey hair that sat atop her head. She got beautiful grey eyes and got wrinkles all over her face which made Lesley guess that she was born somewhere between the early 50s to the late 60s. She wore floral frocks and wore a pair of weathered cork clogs.
"Hi there dear!" she hollered merrily, "You must be Mrs. River, eh?"
"Yes" Mom said, "Come in Ms. Willow! We don't mind!"
"Thank you very much, dear" the old lady said, shaking her clogs off, "Well, Mrs. River, I hereby welcome you to our neighborhood! I'll be your next door neighbor and if you ever need me, I'm always there, knitting by the fire. And please may I confirm again, you're Mrs. River, right?"
"Yes Ms. Willow" she said, "Why not go have a conversation in the drawing room, Ms. Willow? And do you want a cup of tea?"
They both trotted off to the drawing room. Lesley looked outside the unclosed door. Standing there was a big Old English Shepherd dog, barking loudly. It frightened Lesley so much she shrieked loudly and tried to stand up.
"Help!" Lesley cried, trying to stand up, "T-There's a d-d-dog outside our house!"
"I see your fear for dogs activating again, loser?"
Lesley looked behind and saw her rude brother, Yuri standing on the carpet. He was grinning an smile that made Lesley very uncomfortable and looking at her with narrowed eyes.
"There's nothing to be scared about dogs! It's just that you're overreacting to get much attention! You wicked child!"
Lesley glared fearfully at her brother's eyes. Despite being older about a few several years than Yuri, Yuri always called her "child" and was horribly wicked. Lesley gulped and tried to wheel out from the room, but her brother blocked her way, his shadow looming over her body.
"Get out" Lesley said angrily
"Why? Don't you like your little brother?"
"Well, yeah! But for your sake, get out!"
"Meh, do you want to overcome your fear of dogs?"
"Yeah, but-"
"So that's it!" Yuri said gleefully, "Let's make this tiny encounter with a dog now!"
"No!"
But it was too late. Yuri grabbed her wheelchair's hand grip and pushed it to the unclosed door. Lesley shrieked as she knew she was about to meet her doom.
"STOP IT YURI!" Lesley cried, trying to stop Yuri pushing it further by dragging her legs on the ground. But a pang of sharp pain was just the effects.
"OW!" Lesley cried, jerking her legs back up, "Stop it Yuri!"
"But you said you want to overcome your fear!" Yuri laughed, "And now..."
The Old English Shepherd leapt and leapt, barking louder each time. Lesley screamed, but it'll only make the shepherd bark louder. Yuri grinned nastily. Lesley desperately screamed for mother's attention but mother wasn't coming out. At last, she was out in the snow with Yuri. He grinned and ran back to the door.
"Stay cool! Try to overcome your fear! Ha! Ha!" he cackled before jamming the door close.
Now Lesley was out here on the bleak weather with her deepest fear next to her. What was she going to do?
But before we see what happens to Lesley, let us understand her fear for dogs.
Back in the days, when Lesley was 5, she loved dogs. Her family that time owned a German Shepherd. She called it "Bailey" and she loved him. Bailey loved her too and together, they bask under the sun, spending a lot of time to play with each other.
But one day, when she was digging some worms up and putting them in a plastic teacup, Yuri drove Bailey so mad, Bailey chased Yuri all around. Bailey's teeth was shown and when Yuri climbed up a tree, Bailey's teeth sunk into Lesley's leg by mistake, paralyzing her legs. Lesley howled with pain and from then on, she grew to hate and fear dogs.
Now, Lesley was next to her fear and her wheelchair was on the brink of the hill her little house was atop. She was moments to sliding down the hill and getting injured deeply. The shepherd ran around her, licking her with a mix of curiosity and happiness. But Lesley got enough of it and thought of trying to stand up. When Lesley stood up, she knew she had made a big mistake. The shepherd was now sitting on the snow, staring worriedly at her. Lesley felt her leg being weak but was still determined to get back in. The Old English Shepherd barked, telling her to stop it, but she didn't listened and turned around to push her wheelchair facing the door. But just as she turned her wheelchair, a snowball hit her head and she lost balance and tripped on a rock. She was now falling down. The another snowball hit her wheelchair and it fell down. She was falling to her doom. Yuri must be watching along through the window because he shot out from the house, looking down.
"NOOOO!!!" Lesley screamed as the wheelchair was falling right above her. She knew she was about to fall to her death or get crushed to her death or both. She could barely make out Yuri screaming for help.
"LESLEY!" Her mother cried
Lesley felt the life draining out from her when she heard a bark. The shepherd was coming for her!
As Lesley hit the snow, the shepherd howled for help and tried to drag her back up. But Lesley was way too heavy for one dog to drag. Her wheelchair remained stuck in the snow. But things were about to get worse.
Just as the shepherd was finding another way to pull her up, a howl was heard. It was a wolf. Lesley trembled. She never felt such danger in her life. She can't walk. She can't move. And now, she is facing wolves trying to hunt her down. Lesley tried to scream, but was injured seriously and was weakened from her fall. The Old English Shepherd next to her howled and growled at the pack of wolves. But it seems to be defeat because there are about five or six wolves, stalking around the pair.
One of the wolves prowled around Lesley who was trembling on the snow, Lesley managed to sit up and cried, "Calm down Mr. Wolf! I'm too young to die!" but it was helpless because the wolves just surrounded her even more.
Suddenly, a wolf pounced on Lesley. Lesley screamed and felt a bite on her already-paralyzed leg. It wasn't the shepherd but the wolf. But she couldn't feel multiple attacks. She opened her eyes and saw the shepherd fighting the wolves.
"No!" Lesley cried when a wolf nearly bit into the dog's ear. Lesley tried to find something sharp, but couldn't. Just as she was about to let out another scream, she knew she was staring at the answer. Her wheelchair!
Lesley with all her might tried to haul the wheelchair, but her legs were paralyzed and she failed to lift the wheelchair up. She panted, knowing death is near for both her and the pooch when suddenly, a two paws reached out and pushed the wheelchair over to the wolves. They howled with pain when the wheelchair hit their heads but was not let down. They need Lesley for dinner.
Just as they prowled near Lesley and the shepherd, a gunshot sound rang in the air, deafening to all animals. Birds shot out from the skeletal trees, deers ran swiftly away and the wolves howled before retreating back to the forest. Feeling weak, Lesley lay down along side the shepherd who was bleeding from the harsh scratches of the wolves. Snow fell around the pair as help came.
[...]
Lesley woke up in the hospital, a bandage over her bleeding head. She looked around frantically and saw her mother.
"Mom! Mom! Is the dog okay?!" Lesley cried, worried
"Yes... He is fine. Ms. Willow said that he comes over to her house everyday to get food because he's a stray dog. Do you want to keep him as your pet?"
"Of course!" Lesley cried happily, "After this adventure, he had proven himself as a hero to me. My one and all, best friend!"
"What do you want to name him?" Mother smiled
"Bestie" Lesley said finally, grinning in her bed, "Now, where's my dinner?"
More than just a loyal friend(Rachel)
Lesley sat on her wheelchair and stared out from the framed window that overlooks the view of the plain, snowy hills with huge, shadowing skeletal trees reaching out to the bleak December sky and the snowy owls hooting loudly atop the branches. Lesley and her family just moved in and are now spending their first winter over at their new house. As the snow fell rapidly outside the window, a loud knock erupted from the door followed by a loud bark.
Mom ran over to the door and opened it, wearing her knitted sweater with floral patterns decorating the sweater. Standing there on the doorsteps was a little lady with grey hair that sat atop her head. She got beautiful grey eyes and got wrinkles all over her face which made Lesley guess that she was born somewhere between the early 50s to the late 60s. She wore floral frocks and wore a pair of weathered cork clogs.
"Hi there dear!" she hollered merrily, "You must be Mrs. River, eh?"
"Yes" Mom said, "Come in Ms. Willow! We don't mind!"
"Thank you very much, dear" the old lady said, shaking her clogs off, "Well, Mrs. River, I hereby welcome you to our neighborhood! I'll be your next door neighbor and if you ever need me, I'm always there, knitting by the fire. And please may I confirm again, you're Mrs. River, right?"
"Yes Ms. Willow" she said, "Why not go have a conversation in the drawing room, Ms. Willow? And do you want a cup of tea?"
They both trotted off to the drawing room. Lesley looked outside the unclosed door. Standing there was a big Old English Shepherd dog, barking loudly. It frightened Lesley so much she shrieked loudly and tried to stand up.
"Help!" Lesley cried, trying to stand up, "T-There's a d-d-dog outside our house!"
"I see your fear for dogs activating again, loser?"
Lesley looked behind and saw her rude brother, Yuri standing on the carpet. He was grinning an smile that made Lesley very uncomfortable and looking at her with narrowed eyes.
"There's nothing to be scared about dogs! It's just that you're overreacting to get much attention! You wicked child!"
Lesley glared fearfully at her brother's eyes. Despite being older about a few several years than Yuri, Yuri always called her "child" and was horribly wicked. Lesley gulped and tried to wheel out from the room, but her brother blocked her way, his shadow looming over her body.
"Get out" Lesley said angrily
"Why? Don't you like your little brother?"
"Well, yeah! But for your sake, get out!"
"Meh, do you want to overcome your fear of dogs?"
"Yeah, but-"
"So that's it!" Yuri said gleefully, "Let's make this tiny encounter with a dog now!"
"No!"
But it was too late. Yuri grabbed her wheelchair's hand grip and pushed it to the unclosed door. Lesley shrieked as she knew she was about to meet her doom.
"STOP IT YURI!" Lesley cried, trying to stop Yuri pushing it further by dragging her legs on the ground. But a pang of sharp pain was just the effects.
"OW!" Lesley cried, jerking her legs back up, "Stop it Yuri!"
"But you said you want to overcome your fear!" Yuri laughed, "And now..."
The Old English Shepherd leapt and leapt, barking louder each time. Lesley screamed, but it'll only make the shepherd bark louder. Yuri grinned nastily. Lesley desperately screamed for mother's attention but mother wasn't coming out. At last, she was out in the snow with Yuri. He grinned and ran back to the door.
"Stay cool! Try to overcome your fear! Ha! Ha!" he cackled before jamming the door close.
Now Lesley was out here on the bleak weather with her deepest fear next to her. What was she going to do?
But before we see what happens to Lesley, let us understand her fear for dogs.
Back in the days, when Lesley was 5, she loved dogs. Her family that time owned a German Shepherd. She called it "Bailey" and she loved him. Bailey loved her too and together, they bask under the sun, spending a lot of time to play with each other.
But one day, when she was digging some worms up and putting them in a plastic teacup, Yuri drove Bailey so mad, Bailey chased Yuri all around. Bailey's teeth was shown and when Yuri climbed up a tree, Bailey's teeth sunk into Lesley's leg by mistake, paralyzing her legs. Lesley howled with pain and from then on, she grew to hate and fear dogs.
Now, Lesley was next to her fear and her wheelchair was on the brink of the hill her little house was atop. She was moments to sliding down the hill and getting injured deeply. The shepherd ran around her, licking her with a mix of curiosity and happiness. But Lesley got enough of it and thought of trying to stand up. When Lesley stood up, she knew she had made a big mistake. The shepherd was now sitting on the snow, staring worriedly at her. Lesley felt her leg being weak but was still determined to get back in. The Old English Shepherd barked, telling her to stop it, but she didn't listened and turned around to push her wheelchair facing the door. But just as she turned her wheelchair, a snowball hit her head and she lost balance and tripped on a rock. She was now falling down. The another snowball hit her wheelchair and it fell down. She was falling to her doom. Yuri must be watching along through the window because he shot out from the house, looking down.
"NOOOO!!!" Lesley screamed as the wheelchair was falling right above her. She knew she was about to fall to her death or get crushed to her death or both. She could barely make out Yuri screaming for help.
"LESLEY!" Her mother cried
Lesley felt the life draining out from her when she heard a bark. The shepherd was coming for her!
As Lesley hit the snow, the shepherd howled for help and tried to drag her back up. But Lesley was way too heavy for one dog to drag. Her wheelchair remained stuck in the snow. But things were about to get worse.
Just as the shepherd was finding another way to pull her up, a howl was heard. It was a wolf. Lesley trembled. She never felt such danger in her life. She can't walk. She can't move. And now, she is facing wolves trying to hunt her down. Lesley tried to scream, but was injured seriously and was weakened from her fall. The Old English Shepherd next to her howled and growled at the pack of wolves. But it seems to be defeat because there are about five or six wolves, stalking around the pair.
One of the wolves prowled around Lesley who was trembling on the snow, Lesley managed to sit up and cried, "Calm down Mr. Wolf! I'm too young to die!" but it was helpless because the wolves just surrounded her even more.
Suddenly, a wolf pounced on Lesley. Lesley screamed and felt a bite on her already-paralyzed leg. It wasn't the shepherd but the wolf. But she couldn't feel multiple attacks. She opened her eyes and saw the shepherd fighting the wolves.
"No!" Lesley cried when a wolf nearly bit into the dog's ear. Lesley tried to find something sharp, but couldn't. Just as she was about to let out another scream, she knew she was staring at the answer. Her wheelchair!
Lesley with all her might tried to haul the wheelchair, but her legs were paralyzed and she failed to lift the wheelchair up. She panted, knowing death is near for both her and the pooch when suddenly, a two paws reached out and pushed the wheelchair over to the wolves. They howled with pain when the wheelchair hit their heads but was not let down. They need Lesley for dinner.
Just as they prowled near Lesley and the shepherd, a gunshot sound rang in the air, deafening to all animals. Birds shot out from the skeletal trees, deers ran swiftly away and the wolves howled before retreating back to the forest. Feeling weak, Lesley lay down along side the shepherd who was bleeding from the harsh scratches of the wolves. Snow fell around the pair as help came.
[...]
Lesley woke up in the hospital, a bandage over her bleeding head. She looked around frantically and saw her mother.
"Mom! Mom! Is the dog okay?!" Lesley cried, worried
"Yes... He is fine. Ms. Willow said that he comes over to her house everyday to get food because he's a stray dog. Do you want to keep him as your pet?"
"Of course!" Lesley cried happily, "After this adventure, he had proven himself as a hero to me. My one and all, best friend!"
"What do you want to name him?" Mother smiled
"Bestie" Lesley said finally, grinning in her bed, "Now, where's my dinner?"
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Rachel
12/05/2024Hi Hi everyone. Feedback matters! So if you have any feedback, whether good or bad, please tell me so I can improve in the future. Please tell me if there's any gramatical mistakes or spelling mistakes. Thank you for your attention!
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Barry
12/05/2024Rachel,
Your descriptive prose and storytelling are very good. I did find a handful of grammatical mistakes but nothing terribly bad or worth commenting on. My suggestion is that you learn how to improve your writing by reading the short stories of other good writers, people like the Russian, Chekhov, or Maupassant, Tolstoy, Victor Hugo or Thomas Hardy. They all write really good fiction with strong descriptive prose and interesting characters and plots.
You are definitely off to a good start but writing take infinite time, patience and hard work Good luck!
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