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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Adults
- Theme: Horror
- Subject: Horror / Scary
- Published: 12/22/2025
It was a regular sunny day, the kind that should have filled with warmth. Instead, I sat staring at a blank sheet of paper, the silence pressing down on me. Ever since winning the best painter award, the ideas had dried up. The emptiness of the page felt heavier than any canvas I had ever touched.
I decided to walk to the park near my house, hoping the world outside might spark. The air shimmered with light, children laughed by the lake, and for a moment I felt Almost an idea.
Then I heard a beautiful song, too beautiful to ignore, like water singing. But there had never been a waterfall in this park. Curiosity pulled me forward, and soon I found a cascade spilling into a hidden. Behind that there is a cave glowed faintly, walls shimmering as if alive.
Suddenly, the ideas came rushing back. I ran home desperate to capture but the path stretched endlessly. My legs grew heavy, the world bleaching into white, until everything was gone.
I woke with a gasp. It had been a dream. I look at a sheet, the cave, the waterfall was already drawn it wasn't me. I froze and stared on that cave. Something stared back - eyes I did not know. Eyes that move closer and closer, I tried to run away but I can never look away.
I decided to walk to the park near my house, hoping the world outside might spark. The air shimmered with light, children laughed by the lake, and for a moment I felt Almost an idea.
Then I heard a beautiful song, too beautiful to ignore, like water singing. But there had never been a waterfall in this park. Curiosity pulled me forward, and soon I found a cascade spilling into a hidden. Behind that there is a cave glowed faintly, walls shimmering as if alive.
Suddenly, the ideas came rushing back. I ran home desperate to capture but the path stretched endlessly. My legs grew heavy, the world bleaching into white, until everything was gone.
I woke with a gasp. It had been a dream. I look at a sheet, the cave, the waterfall was already drawn it wasn't me. I froze and stared on that cave. Something stared back - eyes I did not know. Eyes that move closer and closer, I tried to run away but I can never look away.
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Denise Arnault
12/24/2025This looks like a good outline for an interesting story, but it seems incomplete. There is not enough STORY, just the list of things that happened. Can you expand upon it?
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Kimbraith
12/24/2025Thank you for your thoughts. I wrote this as a brief, atmospheric piece rather than a fully developed narrative, but I understand your point and will consider expanding more in future work.
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Kankana Kriti
12/22/2025This story is so cool ! And the twist at the end with the drawing and eyes is super creepy.
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Kimbraith
12/22/2025Thank you. I'm just starting my writing journey so you can give me feedback freely. Is the only way I can fix what I need.
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