What She Said

What She Said

She said she had two grown children. Christina was supposed to be a school principal in Ohio, Jeremy a high-priced lawyer in Florida. But after she passed away, no one, not even the state, could find them.

She also said she had risen to head nurse in a hospital where she worked for almost thirty years. Yet, when one of her supposed past charges was asked about her, the person barely remembered her.

She also said she once owned a three-bedroom, two bath home along with her children before they became old enough to move out. Yet, no one could find any real estate records of her owning a house locally.

And lastly, no one could find any of her relatives in the state and town where she supposedly grew up.

You’re right, she was a liar of the highest order, which was why everyone who knew her while she was still alive were amazed that the story she told about stopping a robbery turned out to be true.

She said it happened on the way to the bank. She had just turned the corner holding her umbrella tightly in her hand (it had rained earlier), when a man ran out of the bank, almost knocking her over. She yelled at him to be more careful. That’s when she noticed the canvas bag he was carrying. It had the bank’s name on it. For some reason, she couldn’t explain, she was sure he had just robbed the bank.

Her yelling caused the robber to hesitate for a second and turn to face her, giving her the opportunity to raise her umbrella with its pointed end accidentally jammed into an area on his body that was extremely sensitive. This caused the robber to cry out and drop the money bag while clutching himself in pain. Still bent over, he raised his eyes up to her, then turned and attempted to quickly limp off.

After questioning witnesses, the police became convinced she had nothing to do with the robbery.

The next day, both TV and print news ran a story about a pedestrian named Mary (no last name) using an umbrella to stop a robbery. She even received a monetary reward from the bank.

For once, what she told everyone was true.