Physical Love Abuse(Mislaine Samuel) Physical Love Abuse

He was kind, caring, and rough all in one package. Never thought he would go as far as he did to make me realize.

It all started so well. He called me by tapping on my window to come outside. I didn’t know he was coming. I was kind of shocked yet happy that I could get out of my house and away from the homework that I was procrastinating about. I put my jacket on over my bra and walked out. My mom was on her sleeping pills so i didn’t really care how much noise I made. He had the car running with a heavy fog of weed in the car. I got in and closed the car door quick. I knew how he was about having all the smoke stuck in the car, making him higher, mellow and more focusable, if you can believe that.

“Hey babe”, I said, kissing him on his lips.

“What’s up babe?”, he asked, staring in my eyes and running his hands though my hair.

I loved everything about him. He had a don’t-care attitude that just went well with my image-is-everything ways. It was like we balanced each other out. I was 16 and he was 19 and a bad boy with a record. I was more of a good girl to the world but behind closed doors I was just as bad as he was. I had a record too, but just misdemeanors. He did juvenile time but decided not to go back for his mother. He was nice and romantic and put a lot of effort into making me his woman and not just his teenage girlfriend.

We drove for a nice spot to chill and talk. He parked into a park that had heavy treetops and a street light that was about to go out. He turned off the car and turned toward me. I was looking out the window not noticing that he was pulling me closer into his arms.

“Come here, next to me.” Grabbing my head and tilting my chin up to kiss me.

We stayed like that for a while. Touching me, rubbing me, hugging me, all of me. I couldn’t help myself. I grabbed his hair and pulled him tight. All of a sudden he stopped.

“Why did you stop? Is something wrong?” I said fixing my bra and jacket.

“No nothing’s wrong. It’s just I want to ask you a question.”

“Yeah, what is it? You can ask me anything.”

“It’s just that I've called you over and over again and you never pick up. we stopped going out and we barely make love anymore. Like what’s going on? You don’t want to be with me no more? Is that it?”

I looked at him with a sarcastic look. I didn’t know what he was talking about or where he was pulling this whole fabrication from. I thought he was too drunk and or high and didn’t know he was being delirious, but I needed to know where he was getting all his false information from.

“What are you talking about?” I said with a questionable expression.

“Why don’t you tell me what I’m talking about?” he said with a raunchy tone and leaning back in his seat fixing his pants that I'd undone.

I instantly got mad and started rambling at him. “Ok first of all, I lost my phone and you know that. That’s why you were tapping on my window. Two, I’m in my last year in high school and I need to focus on college, and of course I want to be with you it’s just I need time for myself. just like you have a job and a family, I have a life too. That’s it.”

He smiled at me and pulled me closer to him and whispered, “Sorry” in my ear then started kissing me. Suddenly he yanked my hair roughly and pushed me away from him. He instantly slapped me across my face. I was in shock and in pain which made the pain even more unbearable. I held my face and looked up at him. I could not decide if I should cry or run. I could feel my body getting hot with rage and I lunged at him with full force. Trying to choke, punch, and bite him to make him feel my rage. All the while he was trying to push me off him. I didn’t want to stop fighting. But he was too strong for me, grabbing my wrists and pulling me close to his face.

“Look, I love you. You are all I have here in this world that is keeping me on the straight and narrow. If I lose you I lose myself. We need each other. You hear me?” looking deep into my eyes with his teeth showing.

I shook my head and stared at him. I never knew that’s how he felt about me, about us, and about our future together. I was scared to lose him, but I felt tough as a person, to do whatever it took to keep what's mine. His love was what I was protecting. Never thought it would go this far for him to show me his love and to strengthen my confidence, nor did I know that this very night would turn out like this.

“Do you really love me that much?”

“Yeah, you have no idea how much I love you, need you and want you all in one. But for this to work out you need to be strong and fight back for what you want. Do you understand?”

“Yeah babe, I get it. But you have to promise me that you will never hit me again or I will kill you. Do you understand?”

We both laugh.

“Yeah I understand. I just wanted to see if you were willing to fight for what you want and what you have. Now come here.”

We kissed each other and he started to show me how much he loved me only in the ways he knew how. He was everything I wanted in my life and everything I needed to happen.

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