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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Adults
- Theme: Survival / Success
- Subject: Pain / Problems / Adversity
- Published: 09/30/2012
Lost Ways
Born 1990, F, from Ohio, United States(Intro:) As I walk through the valley of shadow of death I take a look at myself and remember these words. Words that call out to me, words that will always belong to me, words of hate, sorrow, hurt, and pain, and most of all disgust. I have lost all power and all faith. I can tell you exactly what I do and who I am. I can never tell you who I was or who I will be. But I do know one thing and that is my name isn't Jennifer anymore. My name is more powerful and strong, my name is lifeless. My name is death, my name can destroy you if you let it. I destroy homes and tear families apart. I'm more costly than diamonds more precious than gold. I'm easily found under your kitchen sink, your childs closet, and in the woods. I have many names but one you know me the best ill overpower you my name is crystal meth. If you try me you'll never break free and ill own your soul. Ill possess you. you'll steal and you'll lie. You'll even steal from your parents just to get high. I turn people from god and separate you from your friends and family. You'll give up everything, your friends, family, money, home, and children. When I'm finished with you your lucky to live. Ill drive you insane. Ill give you nightmares, visions, shakes, and sweats I want you to know there all gifts from me. You'll regret trying me they always do. But you came to me not I to you. Ill bring you more misery than words can tell come take my hand and ill drag you to hell.
(CHAPTER 1) So my life wasn't always a typical teen I wasn't into sports didn't really have good grades. I had a lot of friends and I always had fun. I always took those consequences like being grounded, can't talk or hang out with your friends after school. What can I say, every teenager has to be bad at least once in their teenage years. But I always respected my parents. For all the teens who say "mom I hate you" "dad I hate you" "I wish you was dead" "don't tell me what to do I'm not a kid anymore" ....the truth is your parents are never wrong. They only do that stuff to protect you. Remember your parents was teens once and they did what your doing to your parents now. You'll grow up and think "why didn't I jus listen to my parents". Now enough with that parenting stuff. Ima tell you alil bit about me. When I was 16 I went homeschooling we moved all the time so my parents didn't want me to fall behind from moving so much. I got my diploma at 17 we are now living in ohio. I have many talents like dancing,singing,writing, and taking care of kids. I have good friends that support me. My parents are not separated. I was a happy girl nothing really upset. I never lie, or steal. My life was happy and normal. I got a job at a fast food place when I was 17. Got my license and a cheap car. When I was 18 I got my own apartment and a great boyfriend that I've been with for about 4 months. I was loving my life and most of all being on my own.
(CHAPTER 2) we have a new girl that started work. I had to train her for a week. She's actually a really cool girl. She hasn't been in ohio that long. I think she said 8 months or more. Her name was amy she was 18 when I met her. Her parents were divorced, her younger brother lives with her aunt, she's a high school drop out. She quit when she was 15. Her father is a lawyer who had an affair with his client. Her mother kicked him out and left state when amy was 13. Amy hasn't heard or seen him since. Her mother is recovering from alcohol addiction. Amy doesn't have that much money she lives very poor. I feel bad for her cause she's been on her own since she was 16 her mother doesn't pay attention to her. Its kinda amazing how a girl like that can be so open with a girl like me. We hung out a lot. She's really fun to be around. Amy became my best friend. She eventually moved in with me. It was great having her there. She would leave 4 days a week at 8:00pm til 2:00 am. I never questioned her about it cause its none of my business. She payed half the bills, help clean, and never missed work. I thought I knew everything about her. But I was wrong she kept a deep secret from me. I found out when she wanted me to go to this party with her. I was mad and confused at first. But I fell for the spell and slipped right in with amy and her friends. I didn't think id ever do it. I never thought I could feel so good. Once turned into twice, twice turned into three and so on. I felt stress free, I felt good, I felt cool, I felt wanted, I felt alive. I never thought it would turn my life into a total disaster. I never thought id fall so hard. I never thought my worst enemy would become such a precious friend of mine.
(CHAPTER 3) 4 months later and my life isn't normal anymore. I'm more deeper in this mess than ever. No matter what I do I cannot break free of this drug. This drug called crystal meth. The damage is done. Its like satan it owns my soul. I'm behind on bills, I barely go to work anymore, I decided that getting high is my number one priority. My whole check goes to my needs and my needles. I've lost all strength and all power over my body. I absolutely have to feel the pleasure of the needle in my arm and the precious sweet drug run through my tiny little veins. My car got repoed, my parents hate me. They think I need help but they don't know what I need. My boyfriend left me. And, amy well I kicked her out a few weeks ago I got fed up with her telling me I have a drug problem and that I need help. What is she talking about I don't have a drug problem. She got me in this mess, yes it was amy who introduced me to this precious little drug. She's just jealous cause I get it way more than she. She was always on my case. Its my apartment I can do what I want. She can't tell me what to do. I'm the one that helped her out. She never appreciated anything. So when she got paid id go in her room and steal money. She owes me anyways I'm not doing anything wrong. I gave up everything for my best friend. And my best friend makes me feel so good. I love you meth don't ever betray me.
(CHAPTER 4) so here I am living on the streets with no job, no money, no home, no family, no friends, and no car. I sell myself to men just to get money for my meth. Later on I eventually met a guy who loved meth to. I stopped selling myself and moved in the garage with him. He taught me how to make meth and the lab. So when he's away I can do it myself. The things I need is: plastic tubing, mason jars, propane tanks, camp stove fuel, empty pill bottles, ephedrine tablets, empty cans of paint thinner, ammonia, glass containers, rock salt, coffee filters red stains, funnels, batteries, and hydrogen peroxide. He taught me slowly and carefully. I eventually moved back on the streets the guy I stayed with put hands on me for not sleeping with him. He said I used him and stole his meth. He's so wrong it was my meth and my meth only. I didn't need him or anybody just me and my meth.
(CHAPTER 5) I'm 20 years old now I'm more carried away with meth. I now weigh 100 pounds I used to weigh 170. My arms are covered in what they call track marks. Both arms gets so tender and sore that ill have to shoot up in my hand or big toe. The girl I am now is lost cold hungry and desperate. My image of a pretty face is gone. My eyes are watery and bloodshot. I can't even remember the last time I've seen my eyes pure white. My face is breaking out, my lips are pealing from them being so chapped. I got bags under my eyes, I hardly sleep. I get only 3 hours of sleep a week. The meth keeps you wide awake and full of energy. I only eat little baby portions of food. Meth makes you not want to eat or drink anything. Meth is very tricky and powerful. You have to force yourself to eat cause if not you'll go weeks without eating or drinking. My finger and toe nails are purple. My skin is pale white and rough. My hair is always greasy. My teeth are rotting, my heart beat races ten times more than what its supposed to beat. My body is weak, my mind is playing tricks on me, I have visions and there's nothing there its just in my head. The skin around the track marks are black and blue. I can barely sleep, I have crazy killing nightmares that makes your bones wanna jump out of your skin. My body is always shaking, my teeth and mouth are always bleeding and sore. When I get sick I only throw up acid. My breath reeks of burned plastic. I smoke the meth when my body parts are to sore to shoot up. The meth has a bad taste to it. Smells like burned plastic and taste like hot metal. But it don't matter to me as long as I get high. I'm never going anywhere meth and I are best friends forever. I can't escape the feeling I love and never will. Dear meth, ill never betray or leave you. Your friend, Jennifer.
(CHAPTER 6) I was set up. I'm now in jail for 6 months. I have to go to rehab and if I'm making progress ill get time takin off. The guy I lived with in the garage is now dead the Meth lab blew up. Amy set me up. She came and seen me today I've been here for a week now. Amy cleaned herself up she said she didn't set me up to hurt me she did it cause she cared and I needed help. I hate her I told her not to ever come back. She made my life a living hell. She took me away from the one thing that mattered the most to me. Meth. It held me together and made me feel good. My body loved it. I betrayed my best friend. I promised id never betray or leave it. Its not my fault right? Its amys. I hate amy, I hate everybody, I even hate myself. My parents never came and seen me yet. They hate me but they don't understand that my friend made me happy. They always said whatever makes me happy they'll stand by my side. They lied, they don't care how I feel and they never will. I'm alone now, my friend is calling out to me. I feel and hear it. I'm feeling very weird, what's going on with me? Why do I feel this way?
(CHAPTER 7) I'm dying, my friend has put a spell on me like the devil. I'm sweating, sick, and shaking. My head is spinning, I'm hearing laughter in my head, my breath is short, the visions are getting worse. Oh my god! What's happening to me? My whole body aches. I try to lay down but a few minutes later I jump up and start screaming and scratching at my skin. There's something crawling in my skin. Bugs! There's bugs crawling in my skin. I keep digging at my skin and they wont get out. My arms are bleeding and scratched up. They finally rushed me to the hospital. The doctors say I'm withdrawaling. There's no bugs under my skin. They called it crank bugs it might feel like there's bugs in my skin but its just my nerves jumping and mind playing tricks on me. They put methadone inside me to keep me from withdrawling. I've been in this hospital for almost a week now. My shakes and sweats are slowly going away. The aches are gone, the nightmares and visions are still there. My heart beat is alil better it races up and down. I can eat and I had a full 8 hours of sleep everynight since the accident. What did I do to myself? How can my meth, my best friend be so cruel, so vicious, so mean, and so powerful.
(CHAPTER 8) I'm now in rehab I have to stay for 8 months. I've been here for about a month now. I'm still confused on what happened to me. I'm still craving meth. My nightmares and visions are slowly fadding they come and go. Lastnight I had a nightmare I woke up screaming in the middle of the night. I've gained 17 pounds. My eye sight is clear, my lips are normal. My scratches are healing even though some left scars. My skin is getting color again. My face is clearing up. My nose is not dry anymore. I get nose bleeds every once in awhile. My track marks are still there but they will scar and eventually fade. My hair is shiney and clean. My teeth are getting fixed. The sores are gone in my mouth. My nails are still purple they will stay that way. My parents came to see me today I miss them. I know I hurt them, I know I did wrong. I learned my lesson. I hate meth it does not own me anymore. The power over me is gone. My parents want me to come home when I get out. I'm goin to, I know ill be safe with them. Nothing or nobody can harm me. Not even meth.
(CHAPTER 9) I thought I knew all about meth. I knew, what it was made of, how to make it, the pleasure it gives you. The way it smelt and taste. I was wrong I didn't know all about it. I learned so much about meth in this drug class in the last couple of months. METH: is a highly addictive and toxic to the brain, it will get you high but it will damage your body and your brain for life. Small amounts of meth can cause and produce rapid heartbeat and high blood pressure. If you take high doses like me it can cause stroke, death, heart attack, and organ failure to overheating. It increases the release of the brain chemical dopamine. At the same time it blocks the brain from absorbing the dopamine released. My drug addiction was a long term effect its ugly and scary. You lose weight, lose your teeth, develope scabs and open sores on your skin and face. Sometimes chronic meth users become panicky and violent. Meth causes disapproval behavior, paranoia, hallucinations, and delusions. Most delusions are crank bugs. Street names for meth are: crystal meth, tina, cristy, glass, ice, chalk, bikers coffee, poor mans cocaine, speed, and tweak. Meth can be used by smoking with foil or pipe, snorted, swallowed, or injected either dry or dissolved in water. The highness of meth last for 12 hours depending on how you take it. I've learned a lot I was stupid and dont know what I was getting myself into. I'm no longer a meth user. I can stand up and proudly say my name is Jennifer and meth no longer has the power over me. I'm clean happy and strong I beat meth addiction.
(CHAPTER 10) I've been clean and out of rehab for about 3 weeks now. I'm now 23 I live with my parents. Were getting along great. I'm the happy Jennifer that I was raised to be. I will never make the mistakes I did again. I got my job back, now I gotta work on getting my car back and a apartment. I talk to amy again. I forgave her and apologized to her. She's clean and drug free she fought it herself. After she seen what it did to me she quit. Ill admitt I got worse than she ever did. She always cared. I just shut her and my family out. I hope this journal reaches out to people struggling on drugs. I want them to feel and see what I went through while reading this. Anyone can beat drug addiction, you have to want it. Mind over matter don't let it fool you. Remember this pain and struggle I went through. My name is jennifer and I beat drug addiction. Love always, jennifer.
(CHAPTER 11) The sorrow the pain it never goes away. The shakes the aches the look on your face. It was poison you was shooting through your veins. It literally and mentally drove you insane. I thought you was better, you looked happy and pure. Nothing but smiles, why did you do it once more. I found you lying on the floor with a needle stuck in your arm. I thought you was well, but you tricked me with your charm. I should've never offered it to you. Oh if I only knew, id say to you it would only hurt you. I miss your smile your laugh and the way you sound. Todays the day we bury you underground. Its an awful day its hurtful, cold, wet, and rainy. I love you jenn.
Your friend, Amy.
Lost Ways(michelle)
(Intro:) As I walk through the valley of shadow of death I take a look at myself and remember these words. Words that call out to me, words that will always belong to me, words of hate, sorrow, hurt, and pain, and most of all disgust. I have lost all power and all faith. I can tell you exactly what I do and who I am. I can never tell you who I was or who I will be. But I do know one thing and that is my name isn't Jennifer anymore. My name is more powerful and strong, my name is lifeless. My name is death, my name can destroy you if you let it. I destroy homes and tear families apart. I'm more costly than diamonds more precious than gold. I'm easily found under your kitchen sink, your childs closet, and in the woods. I have many names but one you know me the best ill overpower you my name is crystal meth. If you try me you'll never break free and ill own your soul. Ill possess you. you'll steal and you'll lie. You'll even steal from your parents just to get high. I turn people from god and separate you from your friends and family. You'll give up everything, your friends, family, money, home, and children. When I'm finished with you your lucky to live. Ill drive you insane. Ill give you nightmares, visions, shakes, and sweats I want you to know there all gifts from me. You'll regret trying me they always do. But you came to me not I to you. Ill bring you more misery than words can tell come take my hand and ill drag you to hell.
(CHAPTER 1) So my life wasn't always a typical teen I wasn't into sports didn't really have good grades. I had a lot of friends and I always had fun. I always took those consequences like being grounded, can't talk or hang out with your friends after school. What can I say, every teenager has to be bad at least once in their teenage years. But I always respected my parents. For all the teens who say "mom I hate you" "dad I hate you" "I wish you was dead" "don't tell me what to do I'm not a kid anymore" ....the truth is your parents are never wrong. They only do that stuff to protect you. Remember your parents was teens once and they did what your doing to your parents now. You'll grow up and think "why didn't I jus listen to my parents". Now enough with that parenting stuff. Ima tell you alil bit about me. When I was 16 I went homeschooling we moved all the time so my parents didn't want me to fall behind from moving so much. I got my diploma at 17 we are now living in ohio. I have many talents like dancing,singing,writing, and taking care of kids. I have good friends that support me. My parents are not separated. I was a happy girl nothing really upset. I never lie, or steal. My life was happy and normal. I got a job at a fast food place when I was 17. Got my license and a cheap car. When I was 18 I got my own apartment and a great boyfriend that I've been with for about 4 months. I was loving my life and most of all being on my own.
(CHAPTER 2) we have a new girl that started work. I had to train her for a week. She's actually a really cool girl. She hasn't been in ohio that long. I think she said 8 months or more. Her name was amy she was 18 when I met her. Her parents were divorced, her younger brother lives with her aunt, she's a high school drop out. She quit when she was 15. Her father is a lawyer who had an affair with his client. Her mother kicked him out and left state when amy was 13. Amy hasn't heard or seen him since. Her mother is recovering from alcohol addiction. Amy doesn't have that much money she lives very poor. I feel bad for her cause she's been on her own since she was 16 her mother doesn't pay attention to her. Its kinda amazing how a girl like that can be so open with a girl like me. We hung out a lot. She's really fun to be around. Amy became my best friend. She eventually moved in with me. It was great having her there. She would leave 4 days a week at 8:00pm til 2:00 am. I never questioned her about it cause its none of my business. She payed half the bills, help clean, and never missed work. I thought I knew everything about her. But I was wrong she kept a deep secret from me. I found out when she wanted me to go to this party with her. I was mad and confused at first. But I fell for the spell and slipped right in with amy and her friends. I didn't think id ever do it. I never thought I could feel so good. Once turned into twice, twice turned into three and so on. I felt stress free, I felt good, I felt cool, I felt wanted, I felt alive. I never thought it would turn my life into a total disaster. I never thought id fall so hard. I never thought my worst enemy would become such a precious friend of mine.
(CHAPTER 3) 4 months later and my life isn't normal anymore. I'm more deeper in this mess than ever. No matter what I do I cannot break free of this drug. This drug called crystal meth. The damage is done. Its like satan it owns my soul. I'm behind on bills, I barely go to work anymore, I decided that getting high is my number one priority. My whole check goes to my needs and my needles. I've lost all strength and all power over my body. I absolutely have to feel the pleasure of the needle in my arm and the precious sweet drug run through my tiny little veins. My car got repoed, my parents hate me. They think I need help but they don't know what I need. My boyfriend left me. And, amy well I kicked her out a few weeks ago I got fed up with her telling me I have a drug problem and that I need help. What is she talking about I don't have a drug problem. She got me in this mess, yes it was amy who introduced me to this precious little drug. She's just jealous cause I get it way more than she. She was always on my case. Its my apartment I can do what I want. She can't tell me what to do. I'm the one that helped her out. She never appreciated anything. So when she got paid id go in her room and steal money. She owes me anyways I'm not doing anything wrong. I gave up everything for my best friend. And my best friend makes me feel so good. I love you meth don't ever betray me.
(CHAPTER 4) so here I am living on the streets with no job, no money, no home, no family, no friends, and no car. I sell myself to men just to get money for my meth. Later on I eventually met a guy who loved meth to. I stopped selling myself and moved in the garage with him. He taught me how to make meth and the lab. So when he's away I can do it myself. The things I need is: plastic tubing, mason jars, propane tanks, camp stove fuel, empty pill bottles, ephedrine tablets, empty cans of paint thinner, ammonia, glass containers, rock salt, coffee filters red stains, funnels, batteries, and hydrogen peroxide. He taught me slowly and carefully. I eventually moved back on the streets the guy I stayed with put hands on me for not sleeping with him. He said I used him and stole his meth. He's so wrong it was my meth and my meth only. I didn't need him or anybody just me and my meth.
(CHAPTER 5) I'm 20 years old now I'm more carried away with meth. I now weigh 100 pounds I used to weigh 170. My arms are covered in what they call track marks. Both arms gets so tender and sore that ill have to shoot up in my hand or big toe. The girl I am now is lost cold hungry and desperate. My image of a pretty face is gone. My eyes are watery and bloodshot. I can't even remember the last time I've seen my eyes pure white. My face is breaking out, my lips are pealing from them being so chapped. I got bags under my eyes, I hardly sleep. I get only 3 hours of sleep a week. The meth keeps you wide awake and full of energy. I only eat little baby portions of food. Meth makes you not want to eat or drink anything. Meth is very tricky and powerful. You have to force yourself to eat cause if not you'll go weeks without eating or drinking. My finger and toe nails are purple. My skin is pale white and rough. My hair is always greasy. My teeth are rotting, my heart beat races ten times more than what its supposed to beat. My body is weak, my mind is playing tricks on me, I have visions and there's nothing there its just in my head. The skin around the track marks are black and blue. I can barely sleep, I have crazy killing nightmares that makes your bones wanna jump out of your skin. My body is always shaking, my teeth and mouth are always bleeding and sore. When I get sick I only throw up acid. My breath reeks of burned plastic. I smoke the meth when my body parts are to sore to shoot up. The meth has a bad taste to it. Smells like burned plastic and taste like hot metal. But it don't matter to me as long as I get high. I'm never going anywhere meth and I are best friends forever. I can't escape the feeling I love and never will. Dear meth, ill never betray or leave you. Your friend, Jennifer.
(CHAPTER 6) I was set up. I'm now in jail for 6 months. I have to go to rehab and if I'm making progress ill get time takin off. The guy I lived with in the garage is now dead the Meth lab blew up. Amy set me up. She came and seen me today I've been here for a week now. Amy cleaned herself up she said she didn't set me up to hurt me she did it cause she cared and I needed help. I hate her I told her not to ever come back. She made my life a living hell. She took me away from the one thing that mattered the most to me. Meth. It held me together and made me feel good. My body loved it. I betrayed my best friend. I promised id never betray or leave it. Its not my fault right? Its amys. I hate amy, I hate everybody, I even hate myself. My parents never came and seen me yet. They hate me but they don't understand that my friend made me happy. They always said whatever makes me happy they'll stand by my side. They lied, they don't care how I feel and they never will. I'm alone now, my friend is calling out to me. I feel and hear it. I'm feeling very weird, what's going on with me? Why do I feel this way?
(CHAPTER 7) I'm dying, my friend has put a spell on me like the devil. I'm sweating, sick, and shaking. My head is spinning, I'm hearing laughter in my head, my breath is short, the visions are getting worse. Oh my god! What's happening to me? My whole body aches. I try to lay down but a few minutes later I jump up and start screaming and scratching at my skin. There's something crawling in my skin. Bugs! There's bugs crawling in my skin. I keep digging at my skin and they wont get out. My arms are bleeding and scratched up. They finally rushed me to the hospital. The doctors say I'm withdrawaling. There's no bugs under my skin. They called it crank bugs it might feel like there's bugs in my skin but its just my nerves jumping and mind playing tricks on me. They put methadone inside me to keep me from withdrawling. I've been in this hospital for almost a week now. My shakes and sweats are slowly going away. The aches are gone, the nightmares and visions are still there. My heart beat is alil better it races up and down. I can eat and I had a full 8 hours of sleep everynight since the accident. What did I do to myself? How can my meth, my best friend be so cruel, so vicious, so mean, and so powerful.
(CHAPTER 8) I'm now in rehab I have to stay for 8 months. I've been here for about a month now. I'm still confused on what happened to me. I'm still craving meth. My nightmares and visions are slowly fadding they come and go. Lastnight I had a nightmare I woke up screaming in the middle of the night. I've gained 17 pounds. My eye sight is clear, my lips are normal. My scratches are healing even though some left scars. My skin is getting color again. My face is clearing up. My nose is not dry anymore. I get nose bleeds every once in awhile. My track marks are still there but they will scar and eventually fade. My hair is shiney and clean. My teeth are getting fixed. The sores are gone in my mouth. My nails are still purple they will stay that way. My parents came to see me today I miss them. I know I hurt them, I know I did wrong. I learned my lesson. I hate meth it does not own me anymore. The power over me is gone. My parents want me to come home when I get out. I'm goin to, I know ill be safe with them. Nothing or nobody can harm me. Not even meth.
(CHAPTER 9) I thought I knew all about meth. I knew, what it was made of, how to make it, the pleasure it gives you. The way it smelt and taste. I was wrong I didn't know all about it. I learned so much about meth in this drug class in the last couple of months. METH: is a highly addictive and toxic to the brain, it will get you high but it will damage your body and your brain for life. Small amounts of meth can cause and produce rapid heartbeat and high blood pressure. If you take high doses like me it can cause stroke, death, heart attack, and organ failure to overheating. It increases the release of the brain chemical dopamine. At the same time it blocks the brain from absorbing the dopamine released. My drug addiction was a long term effect its ugly and scary. You lose weight, lose your teeth, develope scabs and open sores on your skin and face. Sometimes chronic meth users become panicky and violent. Meth causes disapproval behavior, paranoia, hallucinations, and delusions. Most delusions are crank bugs. Street names for meth are: crystal meth, tina, cristy, glass, ice, chalk, bikers coffee, poor mans cocaine, speed, and tweak. Meth can be used by smoking with foil or pipe, snorted, swallowed, or injected either dry or dissolved in water. The highness of meth last for 12 hours depending on how you take it. I've learned a lot I was stupid and dont know what I was getting myself into. I'm no longer a meth user. I can stand up and proudly say my name is Jennifer and meth no longer has the power over me. I'm clean happy and strong I beat meth addiction.
(CHAPTER 10) I've been clean and out of rehab for about 3 weeks now. I'm now 23 I live with my parents. Were getting along great. I'm the happy Jennifer that I was raised to be. I will never make the mistakes I did again. I got my job back, now I gotta work on getting my car back and a apartment. I talk to amy again. I forgave her and apologized to her. She's clean and drug free she fought it herself. After she seen what it did to me she quit. Ill admitt I got worse than she ever did. She always cared. I just shut her and my family out. I hope this journal reaches out to people struggling on drugs. I want them to feel and see what I went through while reading this. Anyone can beat drug addiction, you have to want it. Mind over matter don't let it fool you. Remember this pain and struggle I went through. My name is jennifer and I beat drug addiction. Love always, jennifer.
(CHAPTER 11) The sorrow the pain it never goes away. The shakes the aches the look on your face. It was poison you was shooting through your veins. It literally and mentally drove you insane. I thought you was better, you looked happy and pure. Nothing but smiles, why did you do it once more. I found you lying on the floor with a needle stuck in your arm. I thought you was well, but you tricked me with your charm. I should've never offered it to you. Oh if I only knew, id say to you it would only hurt you. I miss your smile your laugh and the way you sound. Todays the day we bury you underground. Its an awful day its hurtful, cold, wet, and rainy. I love you jenn.
Your friend, Amy.
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