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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Adults
- Theme: Love stories / Romance
- Subject: Comedy / Humor
- Published: 08/19/2013
He-He Ha-Ha-Ho-Ho NO-NO!
Born 1963, F, from Loule, PortugalHe-He Ha-Ha Ho-Ho NO NO
Elsie had known for years that her husband played away. Doug was an ugly son-of-a-bitch, but had a way with the ladies. His magnetic charm had been the reason Elsie had fallen for him, married him and trusted him without question. Now all she had was regrets that hounded her on a daily business. Why had she not seen the devious personality behind the exterior? The bare-faced liar and serial cheat. Why did she stay? Out of duty she told herself over and over again. They had built a home, raised two beautiful children and now all she had to do was continue the charade for another decade or so.
Doug was into all kinds of charity work. It gave him a chance to mingle with the opposite sex as much as he wanted and nobody thought badly of him while he was giving so freely. It was a win-win situation, because his long suffering wife had to plaster a smile on her face despite impregnated dirty details sown and grown. A chance meeting brought a ray of hope into Elsie’s life. She’d been shopping in town when her path crossed his. Rupert Dales had been her first love, but they’d parted after a silly row after a trip to the cinema. He’d never quite left her mind and now she knew why. As soon as their eyes met, both felt the tingle.
Over a hot cup of coffee they chatted about the past, the present, but not the future. How could they? They didn't have one, at least not together. Elsie felt his need, could almost hear the words he yearned to say. Yet they failed him. Just as well, it was easier that way. Eventually she explained that she had to leave and pick up something from the toy department nearby. Her granddaughter had set her heart on a sweetheart doll for Christmas so Elise had made sure she would get it by placing an order. “Mind if I tag along?” Rupert asked timidly. Elsie had every intention of shaking her head with some lame excuse, but didn’t and instead readily agreed.
They walked briskly as time was getting on and the store would be closing soon. She didn't have a clue where her husband was that day, but it was nothing new so she did not give it a second thought. The huge store was quiet as closing time approached. Elise headed to the toy department, still feeling comfortable with the company. Once at the counter they waited for a member of staff, but it appeared that they were already engaged. Childish giggling and laughter came from behind a dark curtain with SANTA COMES TO TOWN emblazoned across it. Rupert’s lips curled into a tell-tale smile and Elsie blushed realizing that Santa was still busy!
They were just about to walk away when Elsie heard the He-He! Ha-Ha Ho- Ho! “Wait a minute. I know that voice!” she hissed under her breath. Rushing forward she grabbed the heavy curtain, pulled it back as the same ditty started to fill the air. Her eyes widened at the sight of Doug dressed as Santa Claus with a young assistant on his knee. Both of his fat dimpled hands were lost up her skirt as his long white beard clung to his chin, while she looked like a ventriloquist dummy in a doomed and groomed hair-piece. His eyes met Elsie’s as did his words, “He-He Ha-Ha Ho-Ho NO NO!
Elsie expected to feel anger of some sort, but didn't. All she did feel was relief. A huge sigh left her as she grinned at the state of affairs. What an idiot! His eyes pleaded for forgiveness as he threw the woman off his knee, but Elsie turned to face the man of her dreams. It was time to take back what she’d lost years ago. Rupert was standing where she’d left him, aghast at the side-show. “Some people have no scruples!” she cried then added, “Let’s go Rupert Darling we have got a lot of catching up to do.”
By Annie Frame Copyright August 2013.
He-He Ha-Ha-Ho-Ho NO-NO!(Annie Frame)
He-He Ha-Ha Ho-Ho NO NO
Elsie had known for years that her husband played away. Doug was an ugly son-of-a-bitch, but had a way with the ladies. His magnetic charm had been the reason Elsie had fallen for him, married him and trusted him without question. Now all she had was regrets that hounded her on a daily business. Why had she not seen the devious personality behind the exterior? The bare-faced liar and serial cheat. Why did she stay? Out of duty she told herself over and over again. They had built a home, raised two beautiful children and now all she had to do was continue the charade for another decade or so.
Doug was into all kinds of charity work. It gave him a chance to mingle with the opposite sex as much as he wanted and nobody thought badly of him while he was giving so freely. It was a win-win situation, because his long suffering wife had to plaster a smile on her face despite impregnated dirty details sown and grown. A chance meeting brought a ray of hope into Elsie’s life. She’d been shopping in town when her path crossed his. Rupert Dales had been her first love, but they’d parted after a silly row after a trip to the cinema. He’d never quite left her mind and now she knew why. As soon as their eyes met, both felt the tingle.
Over a hot cup of coffee they chatted about the past, the present, but not the future. How could they? They didn't have one, at least not together. Elsie felt his need, could almost hear the words he yearned to say. Yet they failed him. Just as well, it was easier that way. Eventually she explained that she had to leave and pick up something from the toy department nearby. Her granddaughter had set her heart on a sweetheart doll for Christmas so Elise had made sure she would get it by placing an order. “Mind if I tag along?” Rupert asked timidly. Elsie had every intention of shaking her head with some lame excuse, but didn’t and instead readily agreed.
They walked briskly as time was getting on and the store would be closing soon. She didn't have a clue where her husband was that day, but it was nothing new so she did not give it a second thought. The huge store was quiet as closing time approached. Elise headed to the toy department, still feeling comfortable with the company. Once at the counter they waited for a member of staff, but it appeared that they were already engaged. Childish giggling and laughter came from behind a dark curtain with SANTA COMES TO TOWN emblazoned across it. Rupert’s lips curled into a tell-tale smile and Elsie blushed realizing that Santa was still busy!
They were just about to walk away when Elsie heard the He-He! Ha-Ha Ho- Ho! “Wait a minute. I know that voice!” she hissed under her breath. Rushing forward she grabbed the heavy curtain, pulled it back as the same ditty started to fill the air. Her eyes widened at the sight of Doug dressed as Santa Claus with a young assistant on his knee. Both of his fat dimpled hands were lost up her skirt as his long white beard clung to his chin, while she looked like a ventriloquist dummy in a doomed and groomed hair-piece. His eyes met Elsie’s as did his words, “He-He Ha-Ha Ho-Ho NO NO!
Elsie expected to feel anger of some sort, but didn't. All she did feel was relief. A huge sigh left her as she grinned at the state of affairs. What an idiot! His eyes pleaded for forgiveness as he threw the woman off his knee, but Elsie turned to face the man of her dreams. It was time to take back what she’d lost years ago. Rupert was standing where she’d left him, aghast at the side-show. “Some people have no scruples!” she cried then added, “Let’s go Rupert Darling we have got a lot of catching up to do.”
By Annie Frame Copyright August 2013.
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