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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Adults
- Theme: Love stories / Romance
- Subject: Personal Growth / Achievement
- Published: 10/21/2013
An Aroma of Affair
Born 1961, F, from Kalispell, MT, United StatesAn Aroma of Affair
By P.S. Winn
Copyright 2013
It was raining out. Not just raining, it was pouring. The rain ran down the window where I stood. I had planned on my husband, Jim, being late, but not Rachael, our daughter. Now I had double worries.
I should have been used to Jim’s late hours by now. Almost every night he came in after midnight. Jim is an accountant and spring is his busiest time. Although he has never been this busy before.
Last night when he came home, I thought I could smell perfume on him, not my brand. I didn’t mention anything to him.
Now, my mind has been on a crazy overload all day. Was it my imagination? Is he lying about the late hours? Have I done something to drive him away? What do I do then?
I feel like breaking down and crying. But no, that would certainly not help matters.
Car lights flashed in the front window. I watch as Rachael climbs out of the car. Then as she waves good-bye to her friends. She is only fourteen, but seems years older. Rachael opened the front door. She was immediately full of apologies.
“Oh mom, I’m sorry if I worried you. I mean it, it’s this awful rain. We had to slow down and take our time getting here. After all, we did want to get here.”
I smiled at Rachael. She always was so thoughtful and caring. I should have known better than to worry. I hoped Rachael’s little sister Becky would end up as good as her. If their attitudes were as alike as their looks I would have no problem. If there wasn't a four year difference between the sisters they would have been twins. I kissed Rachael’s cheek and sent her up to the room she shared with Becky.
Now, if Jim would just get home. I usually waited in our bedroom for him. Not tonight though. I decided I was going to confront Jim tonight. I walked into the kitchen, turning on the radio as I entered. I made a pot of coffee as I listened to the country western music that filled the air. Our town had one radio station. They played classical, rock and easy listening in the day. At night you got country western.
I sat down at the table Jim had made for me. He had built it right after we had been married. That had been sixteen years ago. I had only been eighteen at the time. Fresh and young and very much in love. Jim had been so handsome. Now I thought he was even more so. He had what people called ‘dark good looks’. With his almost black hair and those dark brown eyes of his. Jim worked in his office most of the time, but he still had the build of an athlete. I consider myself in pretty good shape, but Jim puts me to shame.
Standing, I walked over to pot a cup of the freshly brewed coffee. I felt myself craving a cigarette, even though Jim and I had both quit a few years back. I have to admit I do feel a lot better since I quit. Still, old habits die hard and when I worry I want a cigarette. I definitely could have used one now.
If only I could have made myself confront Jim last night. Instead I was such a chicken. I guess I really am scared. Scared that my fears are true. I don’t think I could forgive Jim if he had an affair. Maybe I am old fashioned but I still believe a marriage is sacred. If you want to cheat get divorced first. I’d rather not worry about getting divorced at all. I, myself, could never cheat and have an affair. I just couldn't see myself hurting Jim that way. Even if I didn’t love him, which I do very much; I respect him enough not to hurt him like that. I can only hope Jim feels the same of me.
I am just having a hard time trying to put that smell of perfume out of my mind. I know I didn’t imagine it, or did I? I couldn't get my head straight. Jim’s late, late hours weren't helping me either.
I had to take the girls into consideration here too. Rachael and Becky were always my top priority. How would they feel? What if it all ended in divorce? How would they accept that? If cheating was involved, then I knew a divorce would follow, it would have to. Once you lost trust you didn’t have much. Already I was feeling mistrust and I had no idea what had happened, if anything.
Jim and I have always been so happy. The first year and a half of marriage it was just the two of us. We had such fun then, going on picnics and late walks. Mostly because money at the time was tight and we couldn't afford much.
When I got pregnant with Rachel Jim was happy and supportive. He worried constantly about me being comfortable and pain free, especially when the labor pains came. He even came with me into the delivery room. Back then poor Jim almost had to punch the doctor before he was allowed in. With Becky Jim had been invited in.
Jim has always been a wonderful father. He sat up with me to take care of the girls the times they had been sick. I know he loves them both very much and they feel the same. That thought hurt. I didn’t want to hurt either Jim or the girls. What I really wanted was a husband who loved me and no other woman. I wasn't going to settle on less than that, no matter what.
I poured myself another cup of coffee and looked around the kitchen. I always spend a lot of time in this room. I had redone the whole thing about five years ago. I wanted it to be light and airy. I had stripped all the dark wood cupboards and stained them light. I never thought I could do it myself, but I had really enjoyed the project. Jim had been very encouraging when I had doubted my own abilities.
Now I loved the light cupboards with their burnt stenciled borders. The curtains and floor were yellow with a design that matched the stencil. An assortment of knickknacks, collected over the years, covered my counters and walls. The kitchen was comfortable and emitted a warm feeling. I really loved it, my oasis. Without Jim’s encouragement I never would have finished the room, he had always stood beside me. I loved him for that.
Two years ago, both of my parents had been killed in a car crash. I was devastated. All my life I had enjoyed a close, loving relationship with my parents. To have them both pass away like that had knocked me so far down I thought I’d never be able to get back up. Jim had been the one to help me through that terrible time. His love had turned around my sorrow and hatred for what had happened. Now I am able to look back on the time I did have with my parents with fondness.
There were other times too.
I had been having pains in my stomach. The doctor’s found cysts on my ovaries. When they removed them, the doctor’s also told me that it would be in my best interest not to have more children, and tie my tubes. After the operation I cried for days, feeling like I had somehow given up my womanhood. How could Jim love me when I couldn't give him any more of the children he always loved so much? Jim however, loved me more than ever before.
Now I wondered, how could such a loving, caring man like that possibly have an affair? It didn’t seem possible, but I had watched my own friends, both male and female, watched them as their partners left them for others. The devastation of being left alone. The humiliation of being the one left. Knowing that others knew the circumstances and that they were talking. Those same people who thought their marriages were somehow immune. Just like I was feeling now.
So many things, just going round and round in my head as I watched the hands go round and round on the kitchen’s wall clock.
I finished one pot of coffee and put on another. Anger and worry mixed together as I waited. At two A.M. I walked silently upstairs to check on Rachael and Becky. Both girls slept soundly, the sleep of the unworried. I covered them both up with their blankets, then silently closed their door behind me.
I was lucky to have such good kids. Both girls did well in school. They had outgoing personalities and were well behaved. Yes, I was lucky to have such wonderful daughters.
In fact, everything had been terrific until I had smelled that damn perfume on Jim. Oh, how could he do this? Or did he even do something? I felt like I was going crazy. My life has been so good. I didn’t want it to change now.
The sound of a car outside broke my thoughts. I knew this time the car belonged to Jim. I straightened my shoulders both physically and mentally. I needed to confront Jim tonight, and I would need all the courage I could muster. There was no way I was going to spend another day like today. One filled with confusion and worry.
I heard the slam of his car door, followed by that of the front door. I stood silently in the kitchen. I knew Jim would see the light on and come out here.
A moment later, and there he was. Standing in the kitchen doorway was my husband with his good looks. Tall, dark and handsome. But as I really looked at my husband I also noticed the dark circles under his eyes. Maybe he had been working all these late nights after all. What about the perfume though? Was that really only my imagination after all?
As Jim stepped forward and kissed me, I realized it wasn't. That smell was on him again and stronger than ever.
I got ready to question Jim about everything, but he spoke first, halting my words.
“Honey, what are you doing up so late? I’m glad to see you, but you need your sleep too.”
I started to answer when I noticed Jim had one arm behind his back. He must have had it there all along. Jim noticed the direction of my attention. Slowly he brought his arm out from behind his back. In his hands he held a bottle of perfume. Through the clear glass I could see the golden liquid inside. Jim looked at me.
“This is for you. I was going to wrap it and leave it on the dresser, a surprise for morning. Since you are still awake, you’ll have to take it this way.”
Jim stepped forward and handed me the perfume.
“I know this can’t make up for all the late hours, but maybe it can put a dent in the payment you deserve.”
As I opened the tiny bottle and smelled the now familiar fragrance tears streamed down my cheeks. How stupid I had been. As I thought of my ridiculous imagination, I began laughing. Jim must have thought I’d gone crazy. Instead of that, Jim pulled me into a warm embrace. Nothing had felt more wonderful. All of my idiotic imaginings left me as Jim picked me up and carried me to our bedroom.
On the counter the bottle of perfume sat lonely and forgotten. It would probably stay that way. I could never tell Jim, but I will never be able to use his present.
That fragrance could never be to my liking.
An Aroma of Affair(P.S. Winn)
An Aroma of Affair
By P.S. Winn
Copyright 2013
It was raining out. Not just raining, it was pouring. The rain ran down the window where I stood. I had planned on my husband, Jim, being late, but not Rachael, our daughter. Now I had double worries.
I should have been used to Jim’s late hours by now. Almost every night he came in after midnight. Jim is an accountant and spring is his busiest time. Although he has never been this busy before.
Last night when he came home, I thought I could smell perfume on him, not my brand. I didn’t mention anything to him.
Now, my mind has been on a crazy overload all day. Was it my imagination? Is he lying about the late hours? Have I done something to drive him away? What do I do then?
I feel like breaking down and crying. But no, that would certainly not help matters.
Car lights flashed in the front window. I watch as Rachael climbs out of the car. Then as she waves good-bye to her friends. She is only fourteen, but seems years older. Rachael opened the front door. She was immediately full of apologies.
“Oh mom, I’m sorry if I worried you. I mean it, it’s this awful rain. We had to slow down and take our time getting here. After all, we did want to get here.”
I smiled at Rachael. She always was so thoughtful and caring. I should have known better than to worry. I hoped Rachael’s little sister Becky would end up as good as her. If their attitudes were as alike as their looks I would have no problem. If there wasn't a four year difference between the sisters they would have been twins. I kissed Rachael’s cheek and sent her up to the room she shared with Becky.
Now, if Jim would just get home. I usually waited in our bedroom for him. Not tonight though. I decided I was going to confront Jim tonight. I walked into the kitchen, turning on the radio as I entered. I made a pot of coffee as I listened to the country western music that filled the air. Our town had one radio station. They played classical, rock and easy listening in the day. At night you got country western.
I sat down at the table Jim had made for me. He had built it right after we had been married. That had been sixteen years ago. I had only been eighteen at the time. Fresh and young and very much in love. Jim had been so handsome. Now I thought he was even more so. He had what people called ‘dark good looks’. With his almost black hair and those dark brown eyes of his. Jim worked in his office most of the time, but he still had the build of an athlete. I consider myself in pretty good shape, but Jim puts me to shame.
Standing, I walked over to pot a cup of the freshly brewed coffee. I felt myself craving a cigarette, even though Jim and I had both quit a few years back. I have to admit I do feel a lot better since I quit. Still, old habits die hard and when I worry I want a cigarette. I definitely could have used one now.
If only I could have made myself confront Jim last night. Instead I was such a chicken. I guess I really am scared. Scared that my fears are true. I don’t think I could forgive Jim if he had an affair. Maybe I am old fashioned but I still believe a marriage is sacred. If you want to cheat get divorced first. I’d rather not worry about getting divorced at all. I, myself, could never cheat and have an affair. I just couldn't see myself hurting Jim that way. Even if I didn’t love him, which I do very much; I respect him enough not to hurt him like that. I can only hope Jim feels the same of me.
I am just having a hard time trying to put that smell of perfume out of my mind. I know I didn’t imagine it, or did I? I couldn't get my head straight. Jim’s late, late hours weren't helping me either.
I had to take the girls into consideration here too. Rachael and Becky were always my top priority. How would they feel? What if it all ended in divorce? How would they accept that? If cheating was involved, then I knew a divorce would follow, it would have to. Once you lost trust you didn’t have much. Already I was feeling mistrust and I had no idea what had happened, if anything.
Jim and I have always been so happy. The first year and a half of marriage it was just the two of us. We had such fun then, going on picnics and late walks. Mostly because money at the time was tight and we couldn't afford much.
When I got pregnant with Rachel Jim was happy and supportive. He worried constantly about me being comfortable and pain free, especially when the labor pains came. He even came with me into the delivery room. Back then poor Jim almost had to punch the doctor before he was allowed in. With Becky Jim had been invited in.
Jim has always been a wonderful father. He sat up with me to take care of the girls the times they had been sick. I know he loves them both very much and they feel the same. That thought hurt. I didn’t want to hurt either Jim or the girls. What I really wanted was a husband who loved me and no other woman. I wasn't going to settle on less than that, no matter what.
I poured myself another cup of coffee and looked around the kitchen. I always spend a lot of time in this room. I had redone the whole thing about five years ago. I wanted it to be light and airy. I had stripped all the dark wood cupboards and stained them light. I never thought I could do it myself, but I had really enjoyed the project. Jim had been very encouraging when I had doubted my own abilities.
Now I loved the light cupboards with their burnt stenciled borders. The curtains and floor were yellow with a design that matched the stencil. An assortment of knickknacks, collected over the years, covered my counters and walls. The kitchen was comfortable and emitted a warm feeling. I really loved it, my oasis. Without Jim’s encouragement I never would have finished the room, he had always stood beside me. I loved him for that.
Two years ago, both of my parents had been killed in a car crash. I was devastated. All my life I had enjoyed a close, loving relationship with my parents. To have them both pass away like that had knocked me so far down I thought I’d never be able to get back up. Jim had been the one to help me through that terrible time. His love had turned around my sorrow and hatred for what had happened. Now I am able to look back on the time I did have with my parents with fondness.
There were other times too.
I had been having pains in my stomach. The doctor’s found cysts on my ovaries. When they removed them, the doctor’s also told me that it would be in my best interest not to have more children, and tie my tubes. After the operation I cried for days, feeling like I had somehow given up my womanhood. How could Jim love me when I couldn't give him any more of the children he always loved so much? Jim however, loved me more than ever before.
Now I wondered, how could such a loving, caring man like that possibly have an affair? It didn’t seem possible, but I had watched my own friends, both male and female, watched them as their partners left them for others. The devastation of being left alone. The humiliation of being the one left. Knowing that others knew the circumstances and that they were talking. Those same people who thought their marriages were somehow immune. Just like I was feeling now.
So many things, just going round and round in my head as I watched the hands go round and round on the kitchen’s wall clock.
I finished one pot of coffee and put on another. Anger and worry mixed together as I waited. At two A.M. I walked silently upstairs to check on Rachael and Becky. Both girls slept soundly, the sleep of the unworried. I covered them both up with their blankets, then silently closed their door behind me.
I was lucky to have such good kids. Both girls did well in school. They had outgoing personalities and were well behaved. Yes, I was lucky to have such wonderful daughters.
In fact, everything had been terrific until I had smelled that damn perfume on Jim. Oh, how could he do this? Or did he even do something? I felt like I was going crazy. My life has been so good. I didn’t want it to change now.
The sound of a car outside broke my thoughts. I knew this time the car belonged to Jim. I straightened my shoulders both physically and mentally. I needed to confront Jim tonight, and I would need all the courage I could muster. There was no way I was going to spend another day like today. One filled with confusion and worry.
I heard the slam of his car door, followed by that of the front door. I stood silently in the kitchen. I knew Jim would see the light on and come out here.
A moment later, and there he was. Standing in the kitchen doorway was my husband with his good looks. Tall, dark and handsome. But as I really looked at my husband I also noticed the dark circles under his eyes. Maybe he had been working all these late nights after all. What about the perfume though? Was that really only my imagination after all?
As Jim stepped forward and kissed me, I realized it wasn't. That smell was on him again and stronger than ever.
I got ready to question Jim about everything, but he spoke first, halting my words.
“Honey, what are you doing up so late? I’m glad to see you, but you need your sleep too.”
I started to answer when I noticed Jim had one arm behind his back. He must have had it there all along. Jim noticed the direction of my attention. Slowly he brought his arm out from behind his back. In his hands he held a bottle of perfume. Through the clear glass I could see the golden liquid inside. Jim looked at me.
“This is for you. I was going to wrap it and leave it on the dresser, a surprise for morning. Since you are still awake, you’ll have to take it this way.”
Jim stepped forward and handed me the perfume.
“I know this can’t make up for all the late hours, but maybe it can put a dent in the payment you deserve.”
As I opened the tiny bottle and smelled the now familiar fragrance tears streamed down my cheeks. How stupid I had been. As I thought of my ridiculous imagination, I began laughing. Jim must have thought I’d gone crazy. Instead of that, Jim pulled me into a warm embrace. Nothing had felt more wonderful. All of my idiotic imaginings left me as Jim picked me up and carried me to our bedroom.
On the counter the bottle of perfume sat lonely and forgotten. It would probably stay that way. I could never tell Jim, but I will never be able to use his present.
That fragrance could never be to my liking.
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Zornitsa
01/12/2021Hey,I was wondering if i could use your story for my prose competition?Can we get any contact?
ReplyHelp Us Understand What's Happening
Zornitsa
01/14/2021Thank you so much! :)
Help Us Understand What's Happening
Help Us Understand What's Happening
JD
02/06/2020Truly happy Marriages are so rare... perhaps that is why women are always second guessing things and cannot help but wonder when their men do not come home till late night or the wee hours of the morning from 'work'. They've been pre-conditioned to expect the worst by all the cheaters who went before. I'm glad this particular suspicion turned out to be only an aroma.... Thanks for sharing your short stories on Storystar P.S.
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