Will do? Can do? Have done?

Will do? Can do? Have done?

“There are times in our lives when we are weighed down by our own concerns, too engrossed in ourselves to see that Life is not that bad. That beyond our skulls and self-spun webs, are nicer, lighter aspects of life that we have to take the time to notice. But, we are heavy and our minds are filled with the fog of doubt and worry.”

This is the start of a sermon by a priest that I know. He is actually an uncle of mine. He has been a priest for over forty years and told me once that he sometimes recycles his old ‘speeches’, as he knows the content is still relevant and people do not remember material from decades ago. He said if he did not feel he was called to the priesthood, he would have been a pilot and a part time comedian. I told him to stick to his day job. The nourishment of souls is far greater than telling topical humor in a smoky bar.
While sitting on a bench one day, in a park near his home, Uncle Rasmin was struck by a series of questions he felt compelled to write down. He had addressed these issues before, in his personal life, as part of his theological training, and in more vague terms in addressing parishioners in masses past. But he stated to me, that he never asked these questions in public directly. What follows is a selection of what Father Rasmin Kurtz proposed to the faithful that attended mass just after Christmas about a decade ago.

“Here are three questions you can ask yourself at different times in your life. You can ask them in chronological order, looking towards the future, or they can be asked in a random order. Three simple questions that can elicit amazing answers, if you are willing to search your soul.”

What will I do with my life?
What can I do with my life?
What have I done with my life?

“Someone views their Life, respectively, when they are young, after having lived for a while, and towards the end. The first is filled with hope, undeveloped memories and unattainable dreams. The second question asked by someone who has accomplished a few things, had some schooling, or experienced what it is like to earn a paycheck and pay bills. Finally, question three. It can be asked at a point of transition or when more conscious that Life has an end.”

“When we are about ten, or at the cusp of our teen years, we look to the future with eyes full of hope and a mind that allows for any possibility. ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ Were you ever asked this question? If so, maybe you answered: doctor, nurse, cosmonaut, actor, or race car driver. Some children actually grow up to wear the colors of their dreams. Most of us have to try on several costumes before we discover who we are. Some of us never discover our roles in life, or are not given the opportunity. “
“If we are able to dream, untethered by stress, and supported by those who raise us, we question Life, and wonder what we can do. If all is tranquil in our lives, there at times burns within us the fire of optimism. We are unaware that we are able to fail. It is at this time that our dreams are unrealistic and filled with the naivety of youth. Our hopes are unreachable and random and remain unbroken. We are toy sail boats in a small contained pond, propelled by a warm and constant breeze. Everything looks enormous, days move slower, and we still believe in figments of our imagination. What will we do with our lives? We are hope filled creatures wrapped in gossamer dreams.”

“As we leave childhood and shatter the window of fantasy, left behind are most of the lofty dreams we know we will never attain. We are smarter and more worldly. Our lives have taken us down different paths; some well-groomed, others left neglected. We know of death and several sweet or noxious shades of love. Jobs were gained and lost, hearts broken, and perhaps mended again. It may be our destiny to have children, or work a mediocre job, or recover from malady. Still within us rests hopes and untapped abilities. We may be able to improve our position and ponder what we can still do with the years within our reach that appear without end.”
“After decades elapse and our feet begin to tire from our journey, we become reflective. Gone is most of our hope, and time. Perhaps, some great shock in our life lifts the final veil of uncertainty. We realize that life will end, and we look behind at the things we have done. If at this point we are still unsatisfied, we still may be able to act. To heal or help, to fulfill or forget.”

“We are saddened that years have escaped us, loved ones are gone, and our childhoods appear as a dusty painting out of reach of our embrace. ‘What have I done with my life?’ It is natural to be critical of ourselves now. If we can fight through the heavy anchor chain of regret, we may still be able to accomplish one dream close to our withering hearts.

What will I do with my Life?
What can I do with my Life?
What have I done with my Life?

Though other scenarios can be described, one can see when these questions can be asked, when we are given a second chance. Maybe we start with the last question and work towards accomplishing something large. Traces of gossamer dreams remain perhaps. Slightly drunk with enthusiasm, we start to carve another path in a different, more hopeful direction. We do not know the length of this journey. We must act when we can with the time we are given.”