Getting Over You(MTJ) The last time I saw him was the last day of school. As he walked towards the road with his friends by his side, they looked back at the school and smiled. He noticed me staring sadly at him, not far away, and gave me a small, reassuring smile.

Now, just a few months later, I still find myself thinking of him, wondering if he’s with someone he cares about or how he’s doing. What am I feeling? Is what people call “unrequited love”? My stomach twists in horror and I bring one hand to cover my mouth and the other to lie on my belly. I know the answer, but I can’t bring myself to admit it.

But every time I think of him, I feel lonely and yearn to be with him. My days are long and meaningless, I find myself daydreaming in the middle of class or getting lost in my thoughts which are completely jumbled. Teenage girl thoughts are complicated...


[Present day]

I sit in the cafeteria playing with my food again. My two friends are just an arms reach away, but I ignore them. My mind is thinking of HIM again. 'What do I have to do to move on?' I wonder. 'What is he doing right now?'

"TJ? TJ!" I hear my friend calling.

Snapping out of my thoughts, I turn to her and sigh. "Yes?"

She glares at me with disgust. "What is with you these days? You're sighing and out of it. Out of everything actually! Are we boring you?"

"What?" I ask, clearly confused. It takes a minute for me to realize they just want to talk to me. "Oh sorry. I... I'm sorry. I'm going to go outside for a while. Don't wait for me."

As I walk toward the door of the cafeteria, I hope and I pray they don't follow me. I want to be alone. I can't stand being in a crowded room while I'm trying to think. I keep my head locked at the door, while my eyes look search for a spot to sit.

Lunch is a free period. Students can leave the school for a while to get lunch or go home, but I haven't once taken a step out of school during my lunch periods. So this is my first time going outside. When I push the door open, a rush of air pushes me back. Surprised and a bit annoyed, I push back and finally manage to open the door.

The moment I step out of the school, excitement fills the pit of my stomach and I breathe a long sigh of relief. 'Who knew being outdoors soothes a stressed mind?' I think with a grin on my face. That's when I see a few students outside staring at me.

It's not new, but the looks they give me make me look away, trying to put a dismissive mask on my face. I glance back at the group and I notice the girls are turned whispering and laughing to a boy with blonde hair between them. They're obviously gossiping about me.

"Don't make it look so obvious, morons." I mumble out loud. Then continue to walk to a tree away from them, surprised at my choice of words. When I get to the tree, I take one last glance at the table, curiously. Four out of the five students are completely turned away from me, but a boy with glasses looks at me. When our eyes meet, we both turn away, embarrassed. Blood rushes to my face and my heart starts to beat quickly. 'What was that? Why was he looking at me?'

I pause, then press my palm over my heart. 'I know this feeling!' I think, but quickly dismiss it and scowl at myself. 'I don't even know him!'



A few minutes before the bell rings for third period, I think about getting up and apologizing to my friends for my behaviour. I use the tree for support and stand, brushing dirt off my jeans. I take a step, then find myself staring at a boy's eyes. Startled and flustered, I move back, getting the leg of my jeans stuck on the tree's root and fall.

I try to let out a scream, but it stays in my throat. 'I'm falling and I'm going to hit the tree!!' I scream in my mind urgently. I know the boy is there so I try my luck and reach out my hands. No one grabs it. I will fall. So, I shut my eyes and grit my teeth, preparing for impact.

I hit something hard and hear a tearing sound beside my ear. I also hear a heartbeat and feel a person's breath on my forehead. It takes me a second I realize that I fell on the boy. I open my eyes one-by-one and see his face; he has a thin face and an angular chin, his lips are in a half-smile, but his dark brown eyes are in pain.

"You ok?" He manages to say smiling. I realize I've been staring at him for too long and try to sit up without touching him.

"Yeah thanks." I say softly. As I study him, I notice he didn't change his position. His head is still pointed down, looking to where I was, he is in a seated position with his legs tucked under him, and his right arm is on the tree. "Sorry. Do you need help getting up?"

I kneel beside him and lift his left arm over my shoulder. I start to stand up. He screams.

"What's wrong?" I ask puzzled. He opens his mouth to say something, but I hear nothing. I move in closer to his mouth and hear "my arm".

I look at the arm I lifted, but he didn't scream when I put it around me. Before I look at the other arm on the tree, I begin to hesitate. But why? I walk around him and study his right arm.

I clamp my hand over my mouth and stare in horror. His arm is hooked to the tree.


A few hours later, I sit beside his hospital bed in pure dread. He saved me, but he got hurt doing so. I don't even know him!

Right after I got over the horror, I found a teacher who called the ambulance. They drove me and the boy to the hospital. While they look the pieces of wood out of his arm, a doctor asked me to explain the details. I told him everything, except my embarrassment. His parents came to talk to the doctor too. I tried to avoid their cold glares as they did. Luckily, they left right after that or else I might have lost my cool (if I had any).

I fold my arms over his bed and bury my head in the space between it, my long black hair falling over my face. After thinking about how I'm a terrible person, I feel a hand on my head. I look up and see the boy sitting up. I meet his eyes again. I feel guilty and try to turn away, but his smile draws me in.

"Are you ok?" He asks.

Frowning, I say, "I'm fine, but what about you? You're hurt really badly! They had to put stitches on you! Why'd you save me? You don't even know me!"

By the time I finish speaking or yelling, I notice I'm standing and his eyes are locked on the window. 'Why am I yelling at this guy...?' I think, suddenly exhausted by my outburst.

He trains his eyes on me again, this time, instead of the kind look, he wears a determined glare. "If I hadn't saved you, you would've been in more pain than I am in now. If I hadn't saved you, you would have gotten stitches in your head! It was my decision. Don't question me. I wanted to save you."

As I sit down, I repeat his last sentence in my head. He wanted to save me. I glance at him again, then at his arm. Silently, I run my fingers lightly over the bandages.

"You." He says nodding to me. "What's your name?"

"TJ." I cough.

"Meaning?"

"Tora James." I say embarrassed. My heart is beginning to run again and I find it hard to breathe. 'It's just a name. It's just a name.' I repeat in my mind to calm me down.

"Cool." He has a proud grin on his face and I stare at him oddly. "I'm Damion Kime, 9th grade, glasses kid and second smartest kid in my classes."

For some reason, I find myself laughing and following along. "TJ, 9th grade," Sometimes, when people interest you or make you feel happy, you just need to let go of everything that stresses you and free yourself. "an average student..." With Damion, maybe I can let go of my fist love and all of my secrets. And little-by-little open up. "and Otaku girl."

We both laugh and he motions me to sit beside him. I climb on the bed and rest my head on his shoulder.

Somewhere in my cold, broken heart, a warm bandage is placed. This is the start of something new.

As Damion falls asleep beside me, I smile and whisper, "Good bye...my first love."

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