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- Story Listed as: Fiction For Teens
- Theme: Love stories / Romance
- Subject: Faith / Hope
- Published: 09/15/2014
Death Bed
I’m lying here and all I can think about is you. There’s a faint wailing in my ear and several people panicking among themselves, an uncertain amount of ambulances pronouncing their arriving by their overbearing sirens… however all I hear is you.
4 hours before-
Skipping college again is not one of the brightest decisions I’ve made but hey, we all make mistakes right? Daddy didn’t really give me a choice. It was either go to college and be an outcast or disobey his trust and faith in me? Unfortunate for him, I chose the latter. Worry and guilt engulfed my mind as I walked with my head hung low and my music blaring through my headphones. I used this trick as a way to block out the inner problems but they always found their way to my corrupted mind. ‘smile’ I told myself, ‘everything will work it self out eventually’. I’m not crazy I swear, occasionally i just like to talk to myself, inside my head, to keep myself positive. That’s not crazy right?
As I lift my careless eyes of the path that I am walking on, I manage to spot several over aged men peering at me from their car windows. What gives the them the right to think its okay to just stare at me with out my consent? Or better yet, what gives them the right to shout demeaning things at me from their car windows? I have never quite understood the behaviour of human beings. One minute they’re so sweet and approachable, the next they’re looking at you like you’re something to eat. Personally I find that quite uncomfortable but what does my opinion matter? I’m just the girl who lies upfront to her father.
Squinting to my right, I capture a quick glance of my reflection in a vacant car. My hair looks fine, a bit wind swept but other than that it looks no different from any other day. Naturally straight, people say they’d kill to have hair like mine but to me, its just another boring feature to my plain old face. My eyes are blue but not too blue, my lips are plump but not too plump. So to cut everything short, I’m just another average face to forget about.
I’ve nearly reached my mothers house, her home is the only place where I can hide until ‘college’ is over with. I just wish I could look my father in the eye and say ‘look daddy, I’m not attending college and I haven’t been for the last three weeks…please forgive me’. However I know it wouldn’t be sunshine’s and rainbows that erupt, it would be my worst nightmare. I can 100% stand my ground and say that without a doubt I hate drama. Anything that causes tension and shouting is not a personal favourite of mine. So with my eyes lowered back to the ground I make my way to the only place I can go.
I don’t think I can feel the steady rhythm of my heart beat anymore, it’s changing from rapid to barely there. Bloods slowing trickling down the side of my face but I don’t care about that, I don’t care that one of my legs are probably broken in several different places, I don’t care that one minute I’m awake and the next I’m not, I don’t care that there’s a strange women shining a blinding light into my weary eyes. I just want to feel your hand griping onto mine. I need you.
15 minutes before-
I’ve out stayed my welcome at my mothers house and I’m carelessly making the forty minutes journey back. Feeling of happiness floods my heart when the memory of me and you interrupts my mind.
‘hey you’re not shy are you’?
Butterflies are fluttering aimlessly in the pit of my stomach as I reply ‘normally? No. But around you I cant see to control myself.’
Grinning at that comment he places one arm under both of my legs and hauls me onto his lap. We’re sat parked up in his car in the middle on nowhere. I should be terrified of the deathly darkness but I’m with him. Nothing close to fear crosses my mind. His sandy blonde hair looks effortless but goes perfectly with the structure of his face. His eyes glisten as he sits there just staring into my imperfect eyes, the butterflies are going crazy. His tongue trails over his luscious lips as his head slowly bends closer to mine… It was nowhere near what I expected it to be like, It was even better.
Just in time my mind comes back alive when I begin to cross the road. Then out of nowhere a reckless car swerves in my direction and crash! I need you.
‘sweetie can you please tell me your name?’
I don’t know who’s asking me these questions, the voice doesn’t sound familiar. My hearts picking up its pace as my breathing starts to lose control.
‘Deep breaths sweet heart, it’s all going to be okay. We’re just going to get you to the hospital and patch you up right away. You’ll feel better in no time.’
Patronising much? I’m not seven! I’m seventeen. I’m bubbling up with anger but I know deep down that she’s just trying to help. However I also know she’s lying about the state I am in…my legs are numb and my heads exploding! What is happening to me?
I wake up to blinding lights and white walls staring down at me. Oh god there’s a hand wrapped in mine could it be..? Is it…? Turning my head makes the visitor automatically gasp.
‘Nurse! Nurse she’s awake.’
I’d know that high pitch scream from anywhere, its my mother. Trying to force my eyes open is proving to be a difficult challenge but I slowly take in my surroundings. Over by the corner stands my father. His hands are tucked inside his pockets but he immediately un-tucks them and rushes to my side as my eyes land on his.
‘Don’t do that to me! I thought I’d lost you, I thought you’d gone and I-I…’
‘Daddy please don’t cry’ I croak out. Reality hits me as I ask ‘Daddy what happened? Where am I?’
‘I’ll explain soon girl, just get some rest. It’s going to be okay? You’re going to be okay?’
It sounded more like a question and I would have reassured him if it wasn’t for my eyelids rudely closing and sleep talking over my mind and soul.
What seems like forever I finally wake up…to the sound of crying. Looking beside my temporary bed I find my second oldest sister, Marley, holding onto my hand and producing tears from her eyes like never before. Her hands jerks away and reaches towards my head as she realises I’m partly conscious. Caressing my hair with her tender hand she sits open-mouthed staring at me. She looks as though she has something to say but cant quite gather the voice to say it.
‘does he know?’
Her eyes avert as I ask this question.
‘Marley does he know what happened? Is he coming down? Please tell me he’s coming down?’
A single tear rolls down her eyes as she shakes her head.
‘He’s with her isn’t he?’
Not many of you know what’s going on right now so I’ll do my best to explain; I fell in love with a guy who was already supposed to be in love with someone else. However his words told me otherwise. We’re in a long distance relationship and it proving to be hard but he’s worth the effort. Unfortunately he’s still with her, although he says he’ll sort it out soon. I’m not sure what he means by that but I know he’ll choose either of us and I’m just praying he chooses me.
Hours have gone by as I sit impatiently in this rather uncomfortable bed waiting for him to turn up, but he never does. I can tell my condition is getting worse because I’m finding it hard to breathe. I’m holding on to the hope that he’ll arrive soon but I have a feeling that when the hope slowly dies…so will I. Never ending thoughts run through my head; ’I never got to tell him the three most important words.’ ‘Does he really love me?’ ‘Why isn’t he here when I need him them most?’
I’m slowly breaking my bond with the hope I hold onto. I don’t want to let go of the life I’m clinging fearlessly to but my finger tips are ever so slightly releasing. Forever I was telling myself that maybe death would be better, I’m soon changing my mind when death is crudely forced upon me. My mum wouldn’t cope, she’d close down her mind and soul and be forever useless to my three sister who need all the loving they can get. The people bonded to me by blood will shed tears and may let darkness corrupt their minds. I don’t want to be lying worthless in this bed. I just want him.
Slowly reaching over to the bedside table I gather in my hands the notepad and pen the ever so patronising nurse left. As neat as I can, I write this letter:
‘Dear Ansel,
For whatever my death will land upon you I am truly sorry. I never thought for a minute that the last time I saw you would be in the memory minutes before the life changing event. You’re the last person I thought of when the pain erupted and the first person I thought of when I awoke. For the minimum amount of time I have spent with you I would like to say thank you. All I’ve wanted for some time now is to feel alive, you gave me that and I am forever in your debt. I never understood the love songs until we eventually made love that night. You would ask me if I was okay every step of the way and that made me even more grateful to have met you. Don’t feel guilty that you never made it to my bedside because for a while now I’ve been asking you the question ‘who are you going to choose?’ and finally you have given me the answer. You may not consciously know that yet but you have. You chose her. Don’t for one second think my feelings towards you have changed because they didn’t. Don’t for a second think I hate you because I don’t. The butterflies remain the same as I think about your face. The only difference is, now your truly hers. Ansel? I forgive you.’
A tear slides from my face and lands upon the words I have just written. I can feel my heart giving up and my breathing starts to reduce. Just as my eyes begin to close I hear footsteps make their way to my bedside. With one gently movement a hands carefully grips mine and I hear the familiar voice quietly whisper ‘I choose you.’
THE END
Death Bed(Courtney Sanderson)
Death Bed
I’m lying here and all I can think about is you. There’s a faint wailing in my ear and several people panicking among themselves, an uncertain amount of ambulances pronouncing their arriving by their overbearing sirens… however all I hear is you.
4 hours before-
Skipping college again is not one of the brightest decisions I’ve made but hey, we all make mistakes right? Daddy didn’t really give me a choice. It was either go to college and be an outcast or disobey his trust and faith in me? Unfortunate for him, I chose the latter. Worry and guilt engulfed my mind as I walked with my head hung low and my music blaring through my headphones. I used this trick as a way to block out the inner problems but they always found their way to my corrupted mind. ‘smile’ I told myself, ‘everything will work it self out eventually’. I’m not crazy I swear, occasionally i just like to talk to myself, inside my head, to keep myself positive. That’s not crazy right?
As I lift my careless eyes of the path that I am walking on, I manage to spot several over aged men peering at me from their car windows. What gives the them the right to think its okay to just stare at me with out my consent? Or better yet, what gives them the right to shout demeaning things at me from their car windows? I have never quite understood the behaviour of human beings. One minute they’re so sweet and approachable, the next they’re looking at you like you’re something to eat. Personally I find that quite uncomfortable but what does my opinion matter? I’m just the girl who lies upfront to her father.
Squinting to my right, I capture a quick glance of my reflection in a vacant car. My hair looks fine, a bit wind swept but other than that it looks no different from any other day. Naturally straight, people say they’d kill to have hair like mine but to me, its just another boring feature to my plain old face. My eyes are blue but not too blue, my lips are plump but not too plump. So to cut everything short, I’m just another average face to forget about.
I’ve nearly reached my mothers house, her home is the only place where I can hide until ‘college’ is over with. I just wish I could look my father in the eye and say ‘look daddy, I’m not attending college and I haven’t been for the last three weeks…please forgive me’. However I know it wouldn’t be sunshine’s and rainbows that erupt, it would be my worst nightmare. I can 100% stand my ground and say that without a doubt I hate drama. Anything that causes tension and shouting is not a personal favourite of mine. So with my eyes lowered back to the ground I make my way to the only place I can go.
I don’t think I can feel the steady rhythm of my heart beat anymore, it’s changing from rapid to barely there. Bloods slowing trickling down the side of my face but I don’t care about that, I don’t care that one of my legs are probably broken in several different places, I don’t care that one minute I’m awake and the next I’m not, I don’t care that there’s a strange women shining a blinding light into my weary eyes. I just want to feel your hand griping onto mine. I need you.
15 minutes before-
I’ve out stayed my welcome at my mothers house and I’m carelessly making the forty minutes journey back. Feeling of happiness floods my heart when the memory of me and you interrupts my mind.
‘hey you’re not shy are you’?
Butterflies are fluttering aimlessly in the pit of my stomach as I reply ‘normally? No. But around you I cant see to control myself.’
Grinning at that comment he places one arm under both of my legs and hauls me onto his lap. We’re sat parked up in his car in the middle on nowhere. I should be terrified of the deathly darkness but I’m with him. Nothing close to fear crosses my mind. His sandy blonde hair looks effortless but goes perfectly with the structure of his face. His eyes glisten as he sits there just staring into my imperfect eyes, the butterflies are going crazy. His tongue trails over his luscious lips as his head slowly bends closer to mine… It was nowhere near what I expected it to be like, It was even better.
Just in time my mind comes back alive when I begin to cross the road. Then out of nowhere a reckless car swerves in my direction and crash! I need you.
‘sweetie can you please tell me your name?’
I don’t know who’s asking me these questions, the voice doesn’t sound familiar. My hearts picking up its pace as my breathing starts to lose control.
‘Deep breaths sweet heart, it’s all going to be okay. We’re just going to get you to the hospital and patch you up right away. You’ll feel better in no time.’
Patronising much? I’m not seven! I’m seventeen. I’m bubbling up with anger but I know deep down that she’s just trying to help. However I also know she’s lying about the state I am in…my legs are numb and my heads exploding! What is happening to me?
I wake up to blinding lights and white walls staring down at me. Oh god there’s a hand wrapped in mine could it be..? Is it…? Turning my head makes the visitor automatically gasp.
‘Nurse! Nurse she’s awake.’
I’d know that high pitch scream from anywhere, its my mother. Trying to force my eyes open is proving to be a difficult challenge but I slowly take in my surroundings. Over by the corner stands my father. His hands are tucked inside his pockets but he immediately un-tucks them and rushes to my side as my eyes land on his.
‘Don’t do that to me! I thought I’d lost you, I thought you’d gone and I-I…’
‘Daddy please don’t cry’ I croak out. Reality hits me as I ask ‘Daddy what happened? Where am I?’
‘I’ll explain soon girl, just get some rest. It’s going to be okay? You’re going to be okay?’
It sounded more like a question and I would have reassured him if it wasn’t for my eyelids rudely closing and sleep talking over my mind and soul.
What seems like forever I finally wake up…to the sound of crying. Looking beside my temporary bed I find my second oldest sister, Marley, holding onto my hand and producing tears from her eyes like never before. Her hands jerks away and reaches towards my head as she realises I’m partly conscious. Caressing my hair with her tender hand she sits open-mouthed staring at me. She looks as though she has something to say but cant quite gather the voice to say it.
‘does he know?’
Her eyes avert as I ask this question.
‘Marley does he know what happened? Is he coming down? Please tell me he’s coming down?’
A single tear rolls down her eyes as she shakes her head.
‘He’s with her isn’t he?’
Not many of you know what’s going on right now so I’ll do my best to explain; I fell in love with a guy who was already supposed to be in love with someone else. However his words told me otherwise. We’re in a long distance relationship and it proving to be hard but he’s worth the effort. Unfortunately he’s still with her, although he says he’ll sort it out soon. I’m not sure what he means by that but I know he’ll choose either of us and I’m just praying he chooses me.
Hours have gone by as I sit impatiently in this rather uncomfortable bed waiting for him to turn up, but he never does. I can tell my condition is getting worse because I’m finding it hard to breathe. I’m holding on to the hope that he’ll arrive soon but I have a feeling that when the hope slowly dies…so will I. Never ending thoughts run through my head; ’I never got to tell him the three most important words.’ ‘Does he really love me?’ ‘Why isn’t he here when I need him them most?’
I’m slowly breaking my bond with the hope I hold onto. I don’t want to let go of the life I’m clinging fearlessly to but my finger tips are ever so slightly releasing. Forever I was telling myself that maybe death would be better, I’m soon changing my mind when death is crudely forced upon me. My mum wouldn’t cope, she’d close down her mind and soul and be forever useless to my three sister who need all the loving they can get. The people bonded to me by blood will shed tears and may let darkness corrupt their minds. I don’t want to be lying worthless in this bed. I just want him.
Slowly reaching over to the bedside table I gather in my hands the notepad and pen the ever so patronising nurse left. As neat as I can, I write this letter:
‘Dear Ansel,
For whatever my death will land upon you I am truly sorry. I never thought for a minute that the last time I saw you would be in the memory minutes before the life changing event. You’re the last person I thought of when the pain erupted and the first person I thought of when I awoke. For the minimum amount of time I have spent with you I would like to say thank you. All I’ve wanted for some time now is to feel alive, you gave me that and I am forever in your debt. I never understood the love songs until we eventually made love that night. You would ask me if I was okay every step of the way and that made me even more grateful to have met you. Don’t feel guilty that you never made it to my bedside because for a while now I’ve been asking you the question ‘who are you going to choose?’ and finally you have given me the answer. You may not consciously know that yet but you have. You chose her. Don’t for one second think my feelings towards you have changed because they didn’t. Don’t for a second think I hate you because I don’t. The butterflies remain the same as I think about your face. The only difference is, now your truly hers. Ansel? I forgive you.’
A tear slides from my face and lands upon the words I have just written. I can feel my heart giving up and my breathing starts to reduce. Just as my eyes begin to close I hear footsteps make their way to my bedside. With one gently movement a hands carefully grips mine and I hear the familiar voice quietly whisper ‘I choose you.’
THE END
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