A Time To Cry(Bette Sartore) The sky was as black as her mood. Annie had shivered twice before she realised that the wind had died and that it was raining, the tiny droplets making their presence felt on her face. How long had she been standing there, one hour, three hours? Well, It didn't matter, she had nowhere else to go. Why answered itself in her mind with I don't know so many times that she had lost all sense of reality. "Tom!" she cried out into the night.... But Tom couldn't answer her calls anymore. Tom was dead. One minute he was waving at her from outside the fish and chip shop and the next minute he had disappeared behind a sea of faces. By the time she had crossed the road he was gone. A heart attack the doctor had told her.

He had been a wonderful husband, a kind and considerate man who loved his family. He worked hard at his job at the mill and was made a foreman by the time Larry their eldest was born. Made you wonder why a good man like Tom was taken just when he had reached an age where he could enjoy himself. Annie shivered against the cold rain, depression had become a way of life in the days since Tom's death. She didn't know where to turn or what to do. The bills were piling up and the rent was due Tuesday. Lawrence and Stanley were lost to the war in Vietnam and their daughter Sophie had married a toffee-nosed slug and now lived in England, ashamed of her humble beginnings. Tears poured down Annie's face for the umpteenth time that day. They were falling faster than she could wipe them away.

The chill was creeping into her bones now but she knew she would be just as cold at home, with no wood, a leaking roof and broken windows. Tom would have cried had he seen the house. "Bloody little faggots!" said Annie loudly to nobody as she remembered the pain on returning home from the hospital after Tom's death. She thought nothing else could touch her heart that day, until she saw what the vandalistic little buggers had done. Yes, Tom would have cried and she was glad he wasn't there to see it. 'Funny,' Annie thought to herself, 'it didn't feel so cold now'. She made her way down to the bus shelter, forcing her legs to move and sat squarely on the seat. She tried to think of what to do, what would Tom do? Well he wouldn't sit here and cry that's for sure she told herself. Tom was the practical one, he always knew what to do. There had been some talk about women's shelters, perhaps she could go and ask at the council office in the morning, that would be a start. Maybe they would put her in a home for old ladies, well, she wouldn't mind that either. Company, hot meals and a warm bed, that would be lovely and Tom would approve.

'Better make a move soon,' Annie thought, 'I'll look for my old water bottle and throw some extra coats on the bed'. Her arms and legs felt leaden, defeating her efforts to rise. The tears that fell this time however would have to stay on her face for she couldn't lift her hand to wipe them away. If Tom was here, he would wipe away her tears. Tom always looked after her, that's why it was so hard to know what to do. Annie had never had to organise anything before, Tom told her what to do and she did it, simple! Her thoughts turned to her dead boys and she wished for them fervently, but Sophie she dismissed from her mind almost without any thought at all. Annie chided herself for being silly, she hadn't eaten all day and that was why she had no strength. She would sleep a little while and then she would be able to get up. Besides, she wasn't cold at all now. Annie shut her eyes against the foggy night and let her mind drift. She felt more than heard footsteps nearing the shelter. Forcing her eyes open Annie blinked in disbelief and a tremor shuddered through her. "Tom" she said, "Tom, you've come for me."

Annie's body was found next morning by Jimmy, the bus driver. Frost covered the ground and the air had a decided chill to it. He watched the old lady's frail body being lifted on to the stretcher and shook his head in disbelief. The paramedics had told him there were many old, malnourished and homeless people whom the cold had taken. The thing that had them all guessing, was why Annie had died with a smile on her face.

---