Linda(Jonah Leigh Ramos) “Linda”- April 8, 2010

Dear Diary,
I woke up this morning finding mom and dad crying. Well actually, just hearing them in that situation. I was awake but I remained lying in bed feeling not in the mood to stand up immediately to shout out “Good morning!”
Anyway, I think I was half asleep that time. Flying high in the air assured me I was not totally awake yet. Though, I heard mom and dad holding their conversation in my room. I even felt mommy sitting beside me by my bed— her hand running through my hair.
Their talk was of no interest to me— something about hospitals, surgeries, medicines, and whatsoever. Just what confuses me is that they utter my name, but at least I find no analogy with the Linda they speak of.
“She’s weak,” "Not yet", and with those statements, yeah, that Linda’s not me. I’m healthy and strong, I am not sick… hmmm… wonder who that girl is… I want to meet her— we have the same names!

Hearing their stories about that girl of my same age of 8, I felt pity for her. They say she has this certain kind of disease, what’s that? Leukemia? Wherein the events, they say, are very quick and Leukemia-undetectable, caused by lack of symptoms. Poor Linda… Does that mean she’ll be dying no sooner?

Daddy is a doctor. I heard him say this morning that the sickness was only discovered in her when she was brought to a hospital after vomiting blood earlier— hey! I remember I vomited some red juice last 2 days. My parents said it was blood, but I said it was tomato juice. I kind of drank too much the night before, hehe. They were so nervous they brought me to a hospital! I asked why daddy just didn’t take care of me? He had no (hospital) tools in the house.

Now where was I?... right. I remember dad saying, “Well, we better make the best of her last days.” Wow! That’s really sweet of mom and dad to be thoughtful of a patient’s life. I’m just thinking about that “make the best of her last days” thing. They mentioned they would not tell Linda about her condition— I think they’re afraid. That’s sad, but the good thing is what the occurrences are leading Linda to is that she’ll be meeting Jesus in heaven. God will welcome her there. What a happy thing that is!

I jerked and so mom learned that I was “then” awake. When I faced her, I asked, “Why are you crying mom?” and “Nothing baby,” came the response. She hugged me so tight I could not breathe! I don’t want to open up a conversation about Linda ‘cause she and dad might get disappointed that I have just been eavesdropping, so I didn’t say a word.

Dad excused himself. I think he was crying when he left. Why? But mom got my attention by saying, “We’ll go to the mall today, honey. You better get up now.” I wonder what’s the occasion? Mommy told me I could point out whatever I wanted and they’ll buy it for me. Yeheeeyyy!!! I’ve been dreaming of a Barbie doll just lately.

“I’ll first play with my toys today, mommy, then invite my friends tomorrow…”
”Tomorrow…” mom smiled but cried the more.

This’ll be a great day!

-Linda 4-8-10 (Writing this on board our car while on our way to the mall)

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