Congratulations !
You have been awarded points.
Thank you for !
- Story Listed as: Fiction For Teens
- Theme: Fairy Tales & Fantasy
- Subject: Horror / Scary
- Published: 02/11/2011
Broken Doll
Born 1996, F, from Abbotsford, BC, CanadaOne night, I was walking home. They say that on old Crows' Hill there used to be a mansion. The great house suddenly collapsed on itself for no reason one day. Sometimes when the fog rolls in, day or night, you can see the old house. Or so they say. Some claim to have heard wood rattling together, as if the house is trying to pick itself back up. On my usual route, I pass by Crows' Hill. There is a dense fog tonight, but I'm not superstitious. I saw an old man hobbling in the opposite direction as I was going. As we passed each other, he greeted me.
“Why hello there!” He said. I stopped and turned to him.
“Hello.” I replied. “Are you sure it's safe for you to be out on such a cold night?” I questioned.
“The same could be said for you.” The old man responded, glancing at me mischievously. “Besides, I for one, enjoy nights such as these.” He laughed heartily before asking, “Do you know what used to be inside the mansion on Crows' Hill?”
“I'm sorry, I don't believe in ridiculous stories such as those.” I said. Completely ignoring my pleas, the old man continued.
“The mansion was just a huge stage inside with a life-sized wooden doll in the middle. The myth is, that the doll used to be human, and that she was the wife of the owner of the mansion. She died from a terrible disease long ago, so her husband made her into a wooden doll by putting her skin on wooden parts. The man became obsessed, and started to create a collection of human dolls.” He finished. “Well, I should be on my way.” and he disappeared into the rumbling fog, leaving me in utter shock. The fog got so heavy, and I was so puzzled, that I managed to get myself lost. It was cold, dark and late, and I was shivering and wet. I saw a large house, a mansion. It was old and broken, but standing.
“It must be abandoned.” I thought. “And there's no way it's that made-up fairy tale mansion. I guess I'll use it for tonight.” Sauntering along the path, I made it to the creaking wooden door. It was already open, so I slipped in.
“Sorry to intrude...” I whispered, half joking. Before my eyes, there was an expanse of a wood floor, stretching freely from the door to the grand stairs with a scarlet cape. There was a woman, standing perfectly still in the middle of the floor. She was in a ballet form, with her left leg on the tip of the toe, her right foot pointing to her left knee, and her arms bent above her in an arch. Then, she began to dance. At first, her movements were elegant and graceful, but soon became rigid and brittle. Whenever she moved, the house seemed to move with her. It swayed and groaned when she bended and flew. Aware of the danger, my body would not move because my mind was mesmerized. In twisted amusement, I watched as the woman's left arm fell off. Upon hitting the ground, the left side of the mansion crumbled beneath itself. I realized that the lady wasn't human at all, but rather, a wooden doll. Eventually, its whole body broke, and the house along with it. The last thing I saw was the old man.
The last thing I heard was the old man saying, “Rest at ease. I will not let your beautiful body go to waste, for you have the honour of becoming part of my collection.”
Broken Doll(rachel)
One night, I was walking home. They say that on old Crows' Hill there used to be a mansion. The great house suddenly collapsed on itself for no reason one day. Sometimes when the fog rolls in, day or night, you can see the old house. Or so they say. Some claim to have heard wood rattling together, as if the house is trying to pick itself back up. On my usual route, I pass by Crows' Hill. There is a dense fog tonight, but I'm not superstitious. I saw an old man hobbling in the opposite direction as I was going. As we passed each other, he greeted me.
“Why hello there!” He said. I stopped and turned to him.
“Hello.” I replied. “Are you sure it's safe for you to be out on such a cold night?” I questioned.
“The same could be said for you.” The old man responded, glancing at me mischievously. “Besides, I for one, enjoy nights such as these.” He laughed heartily before asking, “Do you know what used to be inside the mansion on Crows' Hill?”
“I'm sorry, I don't believe in ridiculous stories such as those.” I said. Completely ignoring my pleas, the old man continued.
“The mansion was just a huge stage inside with a life-sized wooden doll in the middle. The myth is, that the doll used to be human, and that she was the wife of the owner of the mansion. She died from a terrible disease long ago, so her husband made her into a wooden doll by putting her skin on wooden parts. The man became obsessed, and started to create a collection of human dolls.” He finished. “Well, I should be on my way.” and he disappeared into the rumbling fog, leaving me in utter shock. The fog got so heavy, and I was so puzzled, that I managed to get myself lost. It was cold, dark and late, and I was shivering and wet. I saw a large house, a mansion. It was old and broken, but standing.
“It must be abandoned.” I thought. “And there's no way it's that made-up fairy tale mansion. I guess I'll use it for tonight.” Sauntering along the path, I made it to the creaking wooden door. It was already open, so I slipped in.
“Sorry to intrude...” I whispered, half joking. Before my eyes, there was an expanse of a wood floor, stretching freely from the door to the grand stairs with a scarlet cape. There was a woman, standing perfectly still in the middle of the floor. She was in a ballet form, with her left leg on the tip of the toe, her right foot pointing to her left knee, and her arms bent above her in an arch. Then, she began to dance. At first, her movements were elegant and graceful, but soon became rigid and brittle. Whenever she moved, the house seemed to move with her. It swayed and groaned when she bended and flew. Aware of the danger, my body would not move because my mind was mesmerized. In twisted amusement, I watched as the woman's left arm fell off. Upon hitting the ground, the left side of the mansion crumbled beneath itself. I realized that the lady wasn't human at all, but rather, a wooden doll. Eventually, its whole body broke, and the house along with it. The last thing I saw was the old man.
The last thing I heard was the old man saying, “Rest at ease. I will not let your beautiful body go to waste, for you have the honour of becoming part of my collection.”
- Share this story on
- 7
COMMENTS (0)